Aug. 27, 2025

Let's Talk About It Tuesday (Recorded LIVE on 8-26-25)

Let's Talk About It Tuesday (Recorded LIVE on 8-26-25)
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It’s "Let’s Talk About It Tuesday", and you already know what that means : Real Fun, Real Life, Real Talk nothing less, nothing fake. Hosting the chaos is Big Corleone, the voice that never folds, with his crew of raw minds and sharp tongues Lady G, Simon Phoenix, and TG Love. Together, we’re bringing the conversation that most won’t touch. No politics, no religion, no stigma just uncut dialogue that hits where it hurts, and heals where it should. Buckle up… because Tuesday just got real.

Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/this-might-hurt-podcast--3239767/support.

WEBVTT

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S s.

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Mmh, Hey, what's up?

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Everybody?

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Just be cold young with this merry podcast and this

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is my cold the Lovely Lady G. I dook thought

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on how you doing?

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What's up everybody?

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How's everybody doing tonight? I hope everybody is having a

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wonderful evening. And thanks suspending it with us. What happened?

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So what's so funny?

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No, I said, ain't nobody going, Oh yeah, nobody?

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Well we have we have a chat room if y'all

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want to hop into the chat room and say what

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you want to say, discuss what you want to discuss.

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We have a lot of a lot of shit to

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talk about tonight. First and foremost, I want to ask

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I looked thought on how she been, how you doing?

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How's everything going good?

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Just got back back from you know, a little break,

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worked a little bit, but I'm back back in to

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the swing of things.

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All right, Yeah, man, how you doing? How you doing?

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Man?

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Everything's good? Hope everything is good? So so yeah, I mean,

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as far as I'm concerned, and everything's cool, everything's things

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all right, you know what I'm saying. Live, We're alive,

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you know what I mean. So that's that's that's something.

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Yeah, it's always something to be happy about.

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Yeah, always, definitely. So we have a couple of topics

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at hand that we're going to talk about discuss tonight.

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We also want to throw it to the chat room

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as well. If there's something you guys want to hear

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us discuss something you have and you know something you

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want to talk about, throw it right at us. You

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know what I'm saying. We'll be more than have be

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to you know, discuss whatever it is the fans want

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to hear you know what I'm saying. So first of all,

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we're going to start off with a situation. One of

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the fans the show wrote in and asked a question

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and he wants, I guess some kind of advice or

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something on his situation. So he has his situation. He

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owes back child support, right, he owes back child support,

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and he owes a substantial amount of money. Now, the

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problem is that he has two kids. The one kid

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he doesn't pay child support for anymore because he's he's

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out of school and you know, he's over eight, he's

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like twenty seven or whatever. But now his other child,

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the problem is that legally, if the child graduates high

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school and doesn't continue schooling. I'm assuming the child support

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should stop.

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Right In the state of New Jersey, kids get child

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support until the age of till their nineteenth birthday.

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Nineteen h so it's nine eighteen, it's nineteen.

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Unless they go to it's nineteen their nineteenth birthday. Because

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so when they hit their nineteenth birthday, that's in the

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state of New Jersey, that's when childhood stopped, or child

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support stops. If they decide to go to a trade school,

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any kind of secondary education, as long as they're taking

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twelve credits or going full time, support can contain you

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until the age of twenty three.

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Okay, So his situation is like this, His kid graduated

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high school, didn't go back, didn't go back to school

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at all, child support was still being deducted, and then

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what ended up happening was, he says the child the

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kid moved to Florida with fiance, boyfriend or something and

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now lives in Florida, but the child support is still

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being deducted where the mom lives in some other states

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somewhere else.

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So right, so, basically New Jersey contacted the mother asked

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if you know informing her that child support would stop

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at nineteen unless she requested an extension and could prove

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that the child was attending some kind of secondary education.

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So before it cuts off, about six months before, everyone

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receives a notification and a request to submit if they

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would like to ask for an extension. So somebody asked

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for an extension, and that's why it's still collecting, because

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nobody has filed to have it terminated.

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Oh so you have to file get terminated. This does

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automatically stop.

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No, it should, but she may have filled out the

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application to have it continue. But it was his responsibility

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as the person paying. It was his responsibility to file

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to make sure that the childhood that child support was terminated. Mhm,

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I see something in the chat going on right there.

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Oh yeah, and he has to pay. He has to pay,

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thanks Melissa. He has to pay his arrears. So that's

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probably also why it's still coming out. So the child support,

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the active child support may have finished, but he still

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owes all those years of arrears. That doesn't stop collecting

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just because.

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Yeah that that that I that I know. As long

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as he as long as he continues to owe whatever it.

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Is he owes, that case is going to stay open.

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It's going to stay open. Yeah. Yeah, that's that's that's

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that's wild. It's it's it's just that what he's what

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he's trying to say is why why is it Why

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is it still adding on to what he owes if

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the child is not in school or doesn't even live

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where the mother lives, and she's out of state, and

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why is it still Well, it.

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Doesn't matter if she's out of state or not. What

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he owes he owes no matter where she goes. And

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I'm not so sure that it is, uh still collecting.

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It could just be the arrears. Uh. Some states actually

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tackle on interest really Yeah, Like New York they tack

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on interest. Uh wow, Maryland they tack on interest.

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Oh shit really yeah wow.

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So so if you if you owe, if if the

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child support has stopped and you owe and you haven't,

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if you have yet to pay the arrears, money gets

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tacked on in New York and Maryland.

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Yeah, it's if it's there, if it's their orders. Yeah,

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as long as you owe money, there's going to be

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interest charged.

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Oh I didn't know that.

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Yeah, because see, every state is every state has its

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own governing laws. Even internationally, every country has its own

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governing laws like, for instance, in the state of Pennsylvania,

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the age of majority is eighteen. It stops at eighteen

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unless the child is in high school. State of New

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Jersey is nineteenth birthday or if they continue to go

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on to school up to twenty three. Other states stop

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at eighteen, and other states, you know, continue on and

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if the child is disabled they can get it for lifetime.

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Really, yeah, you.

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Are dropping some knowledge just how to do that? Not

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loud enough, but all right, Yeah, I didn't I didn't

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know that. I had no no clue that that's how.

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That's how. And I thought I thought it was eighteen.

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I didn't know in the state this state it was nineteen.

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So even it hasn't been that way for a very

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long time, there used to be a point where New

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Jersey didn't have a state of majority, a state of emancipation,

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I mean age of emancipation, but they did. I don't

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know how many years it's been, but yeah, it's stayed

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nineteenth birthday.

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So to the dude that rode in and asked the question,

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your answer, bro, And the crazy, the crazy part about

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it is, so the state the state that let me

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see if he has it in here, the state that

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the the family moved to after leaving New Jersey was

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actually Maryland. HM.

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Well, see, you also have to understand something. It doesn't

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matter what state somebody moves to. What matters is the

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state that the core order, the support order was created in.

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So there's something called there's something called CEJ which is

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the control the state with the controlling order. Right, So

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even though they moved to five million states, right, it

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doesn't matter. As long as they register that core order

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in their state, it's still going to collect, but it

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will always follow the state that created the order. It

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will always follow their state rules. So no matter what state,

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if it's a New Jersey order, if the order was

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created in the state of New Jersey, New Jersey is

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the one that controls the order. No other state can

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modify or change that order unless they register it for modification.

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But New Jersey will still always own that core order.

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So they move to Maryland, that's fine, but it doesn't

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matter what Maryland's law is because it's a New Jersey

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core order, so that the age of emancipation will always

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be nineteen and if they go to school, it will

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be twenty three. Where somebody who lives in the state

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of New Jersey. But their support order is from Pennsylvania.

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It doesn't matter that they live in New Jersey. It

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doesn't go by New Jersey law because it's a Pennsylvania order.

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So once that child hits the age of eighteen or

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finishes high school, it's going to automatically be terminate, even

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in the state of New Jersey because it's not a

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New Jersey order, it's Pennsylvania's order. And so some people try,

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some people try to be slick uh, and they'll close

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or they let the Pennsylvania order like execute, like finish,

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and then and then they'll try to apply in New

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Jersey so they can get those extra couple of years.

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But it doesn't. But it doesn't work that way. The

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judge will tell you no, because once an order for

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a child is terminated, you can't get extra you know,

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extra time on that mm hmm.

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Okay. Knowledge, yeah, love learning things.

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And I'll always be the one to teach you.

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Yeah, oh yeah.

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But even even further than that, even further than the laws,

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the rules, the regulations is the whole idea of and

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and it happens a lot the back and forth about

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you know, some people feeling like it's not fair that.

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And the funny thing is the law not the laws,

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but the tides are changing. It's not as prevalent as

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it used to be. Where back in the day when

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people were still like stay at home moms most of

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the time things like that, the men really didn't have

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too much that they could work with. It was, you know,

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the judges and the courts were really in mom's side,

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right because she's the one doing all the raising and

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things like that. But culture has shifted where more men

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are taking care of the kids, having custody of their

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kids and things like that, and judges really are trying

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to create that joint custody. So men are not owing

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as much as they used to. But the thing is,

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whether it's a man a woman, it doesn't matter. Yes,

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we still have a lot of work to do in

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the system. However, it's improving. It's better than it used

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to be. But the thing is, the point blank is

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two people got together once upon a time, chose one another,

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had a child or children. Right, that does not that

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responsibility does not change just because you're not together anymore.

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You don't stop being a parent just because your relationship

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has ended. And what's happening is you know, men and women.

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I know people don't be because it's a majority of

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men because that's what they do. But it's women too.

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There are women who owe thousands of dollars in arrears

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in child support. The thing is, everybody's always saying, oh, well,

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you know, she should let that go, or he should

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let that go, or why do I have to pay

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this much or that much? Because your child is still

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your responsibility and not everyone in this world was brought

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up to believe that being a good parent involves contributing

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half of what the child needs or children need. So

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when people break up, it's all like, well, I don't

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have to pay for this anymore, and I don't have

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to pay for that because we're not living together or

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we're not married anymore, and that's just not true. You know,

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all the states have a formulary where they compare how

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much time the children spend with both parents, what are

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the incomes of both parents, and that's how they determine,

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you know, the amount of child support that is paid.

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But a lot of people and it's funny because it

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has unfortunately more to women. You know, where the guys

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talk them into dropping the child support or dismissing the arrears.

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And you know, if they do that that, I mean,

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that's their choice. That's their choice. But you also see

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a lot of people who come back again, especially women,

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who come back and want to reinstate that. And you know,

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because they'll say, well, he promised that I dropped the case,

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that he would pay me so much a month. I

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don't care who you are if you believe that there's

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00:19:10.920 --> 00:19:19.960
something wrong, because nobody, I mean, even though you're on probation.

236
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By doing that the truth is the only fair way

237
00:19:24.799 --> 00:19:28.599
to do it is to go through the system because

238
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it keeps it keeps the checks and balances for both sides.

239
00:19:33.119 --> 00:19:38.440
It ensures that it ensures that the custodial parent gets

240
00:19:38.519 --> 00:19:41.799
the support that they need to raise the child. And

241
00:19:41.839 --> 00:19:45.319
then it also ensures for the non custodial parent that

242
00:19:45.400 --> 00:19:50.200
they're doing their part. So it's like and they can,

243
00:19:51.519 --> 00:19:54.480
you know, have their checks and balances. And you know,

244
00:19:54.640 --> 00:19:56.920
like happens to some people when you get older and

245
00:19:56.920 --> 00:19:59.039
the kids start talking about you ain't never done nothing

246
00:19:59.079 --> 00:20:01.880
for me. And you know, because people are talking in

247
00:20:01.920 --> 00:20:04.880
their ear and you know, influencing them. You know, he

248
00:20:04.920 --> 00:20:07.400
can pull out his little sheet and be like, yeah,

249
00:20:07.440 --> 00:20:10.839
I did I pay child support for eighteen nineteen, twenty

250
00:20:10.880 --> 00:20:13.920
three years. And here's my proof, you know, here's my

251
00:20:14.200 --> 00:20:15.440
here's my receipts.

252
00:20:16.599 --> 00:20:19.119
Yes, but see, the thing the thing about about child

253
00:20:19.200 --> 00:20:24.720
support to me is that I think it's not just

254
00:20:24.799 --> 00:20:27.759
about a financial obligation to the child. You know what

255
00:20:27.799 --> 00:20:33.039
I'm saying. I mean, it shouldn't I get I get

256
00:20:33.079 --> 00:20:36.599
the whole having to pay the child support thing. I mean,

257
00:20:36.640 --> 00:20:40.799
I've been doing it. Oh, I have done it. I

258
00:20:40.839 --> 00:20:45.039
started when I was like sixteen seventeen years old, you

259
00:20:45.079 --> 00:20:50.160
know what I'm saying. And I paid all the way through.

260
00:20:51.440 --> 00:20:53.759
My oldest was twenty three, like you said, you know,

261
00:20:54.759 --> 00:21:02.119
And but it's more, it's more than just a financial obligation.

262
00:21:03.599 --> 00:21:08.920
Definitely, definitely. But yeah, Amanda, I and I and I

263
00:21:08.960 --> 00:21:12.240
agree with you, Amanda. I see this on a daily basis.

264
00:21:12.920 --> 00:21:18.200
So many men working under the table so that they

265
00:21:18.519 --> 00:21:23.440
don't have their wages garnished, you know, so many men

266
00:21:23.480 --> 00:21:26.079
who don't put things in their names so that they

267
00:21:26.119 --> 00:21:30.440
don't have their their pay taken away and stuff like that.

268
00:21:30.960 --> 00:21:34.279
But like you're saying, Corleon, it's more about the sense

269
00:21:34.279 --> 00:21:40.680
of principle, right, you can't make someone be a good parent.

270
00:21:41.200 --> 00:21:45.759
That's the unfortunate thing. And there are just people out

271
00:21:45.839 --> 00:21:50.599
there that are so wrapped up in themselves, so selfish

272
00:21:50.640 --> 00:21:55.799
in a new relationship or whatever that it's not that

273
00:21:55.880 --> 00:21:58.480
they don't care about their kids, but they don't care

274
00:21:58.480 --> 00:22:02.640
about their kids there they don't. But also some of

275
00:22:02.640 --> 00:22:05.240
them just weren't taught. They don't have the skills to

276
00:22:05.400 --> 00:22:08.920
understand that you are responsible for the things in this

277
00:22:09.039 --> 00:22:12.200
life that you create, not just kids, but any situation

278
00:22:12.359 --> 00:22:15.920
you create, you need to be responsible and accountable for it.

279
00:22:16.440 --> 00:22:20.279
But everybody does not want to take that responsibility, you know,

280
00:22:20.519 --> 00:22:25.519
like it's not a bad thing, it's not a good thing.

281
00:22:25.519 --> 00:22:33.359
But like my ex husband, he's he he's consistent with

282
00:22:33.400 --> 00:22:39.359
the payments, but what good I mean the payments helped

283
00:22:39.559 --> 00:22:44.279
to keep the children alive and fed, you know, keep

284
00:22:44.359 --> 00:22:46.960
us with a roof over our head, But at the

285
00:22:47.079 --> 00:22:51.480
end of the day, what type of time does he

286
00:22:51.640 --> 00:22:52.480
spend with them?

287
00:22:52.960 --> 00:22:53.039
What?

288
00:22:53.880 --> 00:22:56.960
You know? You know, so it's great he's consistent with

289
00:22:57.000 --> 00:23:00.680
the financial but it's not just about the financial. You know.

290
00:23:00.839 --> 00:23:04.559
People are fighting. Yeah, people are fighting each other just

291
00:23:04.599 --> 00:23:07.400
for the sake of getting back at one another. And

292
00:23:07.640 --> 00:23:11.160
the only people that suffer in that situation are the

293
00:23:11.240 --> 00:23:18.240
children because they're losing time, they're losing love, they're losing

294
00:23:19.039 --> 00:23:21.720
you know, knowledge, like the things that they can be

295
00:23:21.839 --> 00:23:25.240
taught because one adult is mad at another adult and

296
00:23:25.359 --> 00:23:30.119
acting like children, you know, and they make the situations

297
00:23:30.240 --> 00:23:34.119
about how they can one up the other one, or

298
00:23:34.160 --> 00:23:37.519
because they're angry, how can I get back at them,

299
00:23:38.240 --> 00:23:41.240
how can I make them pay? And then even women,

300
00:23:41.519 --> 00:23:46.079
let me tell you, I get so disgusted with some

301
00:23:46.319 --> 00:23:50.319
of our women, you know that use the child as

302
00:23:50.359 --> 00:23:53.240
a pawn. Well, you don't pay child support, so you

303
00:23:53.279 --> 00:23:57.960
can't see your kids. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Guys. One

304
00:23:58.039 --> 00:24:01.279
has nothing to do with the other. Just because he's

305
00:24:01.319 --> 00:24:04.920
a deadbeat in the finances doesn't mean that he loses

306
00:24:05.039 --> 00:24:08.880
parental rights to see his children, you know. And that's

307
00:24:08.920 --> 00:24:12.079
a little unfair, you know. It's like I'm holding our

308
00:24:12.160 --> 00:24:16.680
kid hostage because you won't step up to the plate. No,

309
00:24:17.119 --> 00:24:20.039
how about you do everything that you need to do

310
00:24:20.119 --> 00:24:24.559
as a parent and be responsible. Let the child, because

311
00:24:24.559 --> 00:24:27.759
it's about your child. Let the child see their other parents,

312
00:24:28.319 --> 00:24:31.680
Let them spend time, because, believe it or not, that

313
00:24:31.920 --> 00:24:35.359
person is going to show their children who they really are.

314
00:24:36.400 --> 00:24:41.799
So you know, so what, they don't pay the child support,

315
00:24:41.839 --> 00:24:45.279
then keep going after them, keep petitioning to the state

316
00:24:45.359 --> 00:24:49.319
to enforce the child support. But you're being very immature

317
00:24:49.359 --> 00:24:53.640
and childish when just because someone's not paying their support

318
00:24:54.160 --> 00:24:56.720
that now you're going to withhold the children from seeing

319
00:24:56.759 --> 00:24:57.680
their other parents.

320
00:24:58.079 --> 00:24:58.519
You're going to.

321
00:24:58.519 --> 00:25:01.200
Break the kid's part just because you don't have money

322
00:25:01.240 --> 00:25:05.759
in your pocket. You know. Yeah, I mean, and it sucks.

323
00:25:05.839 --> 00:25:10.680
It sucks, But we're not We're not punishing the other parent.

324
00:25:10.759 --> 00:25:15.400
We're punishing our kids. Yeah, punishing our children, and they

325
00:25:15.519 --> 00:25:20.319
become resentful after a while, you know, right, But there's

326
00:25:20.359 --> 00:25:24.000
there's just I've just seen so many people use the

327
00:25:24.119 --> 00:25:27.079
children as a way to get back at the other parent.

328
00:25:28.079 --> 00:25:32.480
And it might work for a little bit, but that

329
00:25:32.559 --> 00:25:34.759
don't last long because in the end, the kids are

330
00:25:34.759 --> 00:25:37.279
the ones that have the animosity and they lose.

331
00:25:39.039 --> 00:25:41.400
Let me, let me bring in doves.

332
00:25:41.440 --> 00:25:51.640
Hold up, mm hmm, you hey, yo, what's up? Hold on, lady, G.

333
00:25:51.839 --> 00:25:52.400
Was on a roll.

334
00:25:54.400 --> 00:25:56.319
I was done, my thought I was done.

335
00:25:56.319 --> 00:26:00.160
My thoughts continue continue because you know, I mean, like, like,

336
00:26:00.200 --> 00:26:01.680
you know what, it's so ironic, how like.

337
00:26:02.440 --> 00:26:08.720
If any questions now not like it's ironic because like

338
00:26:09.519 --> 00:26:11.519
you're explaining the exact same thing that.

339
00:26:12.119 --> 00:26:12.640
I went through.

340
00:26:13.480 --> 00:26:16.920
Now, you know what I mean, let me let me

341
00:26:17.000 --> 00:26:18.480
row the windows for this one, because you know what,

342
00:26:21.440 --> 00:26:24.359
as a man, right, I'm not gonna you know, I'm

343
00:26:24.359 --> 00:26:26.240
not gonna sit here and play victim or whatever, because

344
00:26:26.279 --> 00:26:28.559
you know what, some of the things were self inflicted.

345
00:26:29.039 --> 00:26:30.960
You know, I was in my twenties, you know what

346
00:26:30.960 --> 00:26:34.799
I'm saying, like like, you know, like if I would

347
00:26:34.839 --> 00:26:36.599
have learned how to swallow my pride and like you know,

348
00:26:36.799 --> 00:26:38.480
push my ego to the side, you know, like I

349
00:26:38.480 --> 00:26:41.640
would have a better relationship with with my both my

350
00:26:41.720 --> 00:26:45.279
kids moms, right, but yeah I didn't.

351
00:26:45.559 --> 00:26:51.559
So you know, like my daughter, like my.

352
00:26:51.880 --> 00:26:56.599
Oldest daughter's mom, she really, like you said, use my

353
00:26:56.680 --> 00:26:58.839
child against me, you know, And I'm still trying to

354
00:26:58.839 --> 00:27:02.480
clean that up as speak in Today's a birthday, Happy.

355
00:27:02.160 --> 00:27:04.640
Birthday, Mama, Dad loves you still.

356
00:27:06.319 --> 00:27:10.160
You know, she's twenty one today, so you know, like today,

357
00:27:10.200 --> 00:27:14.160
you know, like you know, like our relationship is like yeah,

358
00:27:15.200 --> 00:27:17.480
like here and there, but I texted, you know, like

359
00:27:17.839 --> 00:27:20.799
I texted her most you know, and you know she

360
00:27:21.119 --> 00:27:23.680
you know, like she don't respond, like you know, like

361
00:27:23.720 --> 00:27:26.799
three fourths at the time. But I expect that, you know,

362
00:27:26.920 --> 00:27:29.880
because like there was a huge thirteen year gap which

363
00:27:29.880 --> 00:27:31.960
I wasn't in her life because.

364
00:27:33.599 --> 00:27:37.960
Right, okay, so can I ask about that, dubs? Yeah,

365
00:27:38.000 --> 00:27:41.599
well so I hear that a lot too. You know,

366
00:27:41.799 --> 00:27:46.279
like I didn't do something because of the other parents.

367
00:27:47.440 --> 00:27:50.839
So when you think back on that, despite what she

368
00:27:51.119 --> 00:27:54.240
was doing, right, what do you think you could have

369
00:27:54.480 --> 00:27:57.720
done to at least still show your daughter.

370
00:27:58.079 --> 00:28:02.079
You were abroad? So swallow my product. That's that yo.

371
00:28:02.119 --> 00:28:05.519
You know what. It's not like I didn't want to

372
00:28:05.519 --> 00:28:06.440
see her, because I did.

373
00:28:06.480 --> 00:28:11.680
But you know, the truth is, like I guess I

374
00:28:11.759 --> 00:28:13.720
hurt my daughter's mom so much to the point where

375
00:28:13.720 --> 00:28:15.559
she hated my guts that she did what she did

376
00:28:15.680 --> 00:28:18.559
because you know, to take away to take away your

377
00:28:18.640 --> 00:28:19.799
child from the father's life.

378
00:28:19.839 --> 00:28:24.279
I mean, that's hatred right there, and that I deserve it.

379
00:28:24.319 --> 00:28:27.519
I mean at some point, I mean, like, yeah, I

380
00:28:27.599 --> 00:28:30.680
kind of did, but like not to this extent, And

381
00:28:30.720 --> 00:28:31.480
that's possible.

382
00:28:31.599 --> 00:28:36.519
That's possible people do take it to the unteened degree.

383
00:28:36.240 --> 00:28:38.039
You know, like like you know, like not to this

384
00:28:38.119 --> 00:28:42.519
extent where you know what I mean, like where like

385
00:28:42.559 --> 00:28:44.480
my relationship with my daughter is like kind of like

386
00:28:44.519 --> 00:28:48.200
you know, it's like very like Frosty, and.

387
00:28:50.039 --> 00:28:52.759
You know, like I don't. I don't talk to my

388
00:28:52.920 --> 00:28:53.720
daughter about her mom.

389
00:28:55.319 --> 00:28:58.359
You know what I'm saying, because I'm always going to

390
00:28:58.440 --> 00:29:00.880
be the villain of someone's story, you know, stay what

391
00:29:00.880 --> 00:29:03.400
I'm saying. I'm always going to be the villain. So

392
00:29:03.559 --> 00:29:06.759
in this story, I'm the villain, right And I told

393
00:29:06.759 --> 00:29:08.440
my daughters. I told my daughter that. I was like, yo,

394
00:29:08.480 --> 00:29:10.759
you know what, in everyone's story on your side of

395
00:29:10.799 --> 00:29:15.079
the family, everybody's story, I'm the villain, you know which,

396
00:29:15.119 --> 00:29:16.640
you know, Like I was like, I'm not proud of it.

397
00:29:17.400 --> 00:29:19.319
I was like, you know, whatever they said, half of

398
00:29:19.359 --> 00:29:22.799
it is probably true and half of it is now right,

399
00:29:22.839 --> 00:29:25.960
you know. I was like, you know, like I'm not

400
00:29:26.079 --> 00:29:29.160
I'm not gonna, you know, like sit here and play victim,

401
00:29:29.240 --> 00:29:30.160
like who won't this me?

402
00:29:30.319 --> 00:29:33.119
No, I don't you know, I'm not gonna do that.

403
00:29:33.200 --> 00:29:39.519
But to you know, so yes, it influenced. It influenced

404
00:29:39.559 --> 00:29:43.200
how you how you acted and reacted. But that's the

405
00:29:43.240 --> 00:29:51.039
thing too, like I don't care this other parent does.

406
00:29:52.119 --> 00:29:57.079
There's nothing you can do that is going to stop

407
00:29:57.119 --> 00:30:01.359
me from showing up even when like, even when it's

408
00:30:01.400 --> 00:30:05.599
difficult to do so, right, I'm gonna try to exhaust.

409
00:30:06.680 --> 00:30:10.400
You know what when when we went to court, right,

410
00:30:11.319 --> 00:30:13.640
like you know, like my daughter's mom lied lied on

411
00:30:13.759 --> 00:30:16.720
me to the point where it's like, you know, like

412
00:30:16.759 --> 00:30:20.400
the judge was like believing it, you know, right right right,

413
00:30:20.960 --> 00:30:23.200
So I got burned, you know what I'm saying, Like

414
00:30:23.240 --> 00:30:26.599
she said I was a gang member. She said once

415
00:30:26.680 --> 00:30:28.319
she said that, you know, once upon time there was

416
00:30:28.359 --> 00:30:30.319
guns in the house. And I'm my mind, I'm like,

417
00:30:31.359 --> 00:30:32.279
what when was this?

418
00:30:33.400 --> 00:30:37.640
You know? Like see my averagance in court also made.

419
00:30:37.519 --> 00:30:42.400
It believable that worked against you because because you know,

420
00:30:43.039 --> 00:30:44.960
when she was telling her story, I got up. I

421
00:30:44.960 --> 00:30:47.039
started clapping, mind you, this is this is new work.

422
00:30:47.079 --> 00:30:50.920
Two twelve Washington Street, Esse's County. I hate that building

423
00:30:50.920 --> 00:30:53.000
as well. I hate that building much as I hate

424
00:30:53.039 --> 00:30:56.519
five ninety. You know what I'm saying, they both equally.

425
00:30:56.519 --> 00:30:57.519
You know what I'm saying. I can't wait.

426
00:30:57.599 --> 00:31:02.000
I can't wait till they employe those buildings. Right, So

427
00:31:03.279 --> 00:31:04.680
my arrogant you know what I'm saying, I died of

428
00:31:04.759 --> 00:31:07.440
because I knew she was lying. I started clapping my hands.

429
00:31:07.480 --> 00:31:10.279
I was like that's an Oscar worthy. That's an Oscar worthy.

430
00:31:11.000 --> 00:31:16.720
You know what I'm saying performance right there, right, and

431
00:31:16.799 --> 00:31:21.440
after that, you know, like it just went downhill fast,

432
00:31:22.279 --> 00:31:24.960
right where I had to go to like I had

433
00:31:25.000 --> 00:31:26.759
to report the east Oorring to you know, do these

434
00:31:26.920 --> 00:31:30.000
domestic violence classes and whatever. And I was doing them.

435
00:31:30.240 --> 00:31:32.599
But then like, you know, like, but see the thing

436
00:31:32.680 --> 00:31:34.200
is right. I told them, I said, yo, I work

437
00:31:34.240 --> 00:31:36.759
those days. Is there a weekend? They're like, nope, it's

438
00:31:36.799 --> 00:31:40.759
just it's just Wednesday night, right, And I work Wednesday

439
00:31:40.839 --> 00:31:43.440
nights at the time, So I had to do doubles

440
00:31:43.440 --> 00:31:45.920
on Thursdays just to do those. Just do those classes

441
00:31:46.000 --> 00:31:49.279
on Mondays on Wednesdays, right, And then like my supervisors,

442
00:31:49.319 --> 00:31:52.160
you know what I'm saying, Like on supervisor, my boss says,

443
00:31:52.160 --> 00:31:53.519
I can't be doing that no more. I'm like, yo,

444
00:31:53.519 --> 00:31:55.480
I got something going on, you know what I'm saying.

445
00:31:55.680 --> 00:31:57.400
I just got like two more months left. They're like, yeah,

446
00:31:57.400 --> 00:31:59.759
we can't do it, you know, because like they're coming

447
00:31:59.759 --> 00:32:01.759
down on us and this, thatand the third. So then

448
00:32:01.839 --> 00:32:05.480
like I try to tell them and mind you you

449
00:32:05.519 --> 00:32:07.880
know what I'm saying, These DV classes they cost thirty

450
00:32:07.920 --> 00:32:08.480
five dollars.

451
00:32:08.319 --> 00:32:11.319
A piece at the time, right, but it's good you know.

452
00:32:12.559 --> 00:32:15.880
Also yo yo, also yo, what I mean, So I

453
00:32:15.920 --> 00:32:16.720
also have to go to.

454
00:32:18.279 --> 00:32:20.200
Like a at the time for my you know, for

455
00:32:20.319 --> 00:32:23.519
my daughter's mom, and I'm like what you know, like then,

456
00:32:23.640 --> 00:32:26.200
but then again, I mean it made sense later on

457
00:32:26.240 --> 00:32:29.880
in life right and anger management, and I'm paying and

458
00:32:29.880 --> 00:32:31.839
I'm coming out of pocket with these classes. But like

459
00:32:33.279 --> 00:32:35.200
I'm doing, I may doing all this and then like

460
00:32:36.519 --> 00:32:37.839
all of a sudden, like you know, like I got

461
00:32:37.839 --> 00:32:42.920
a letter in my house talking about, yeah, she's moving.

462
00:32:42.920 --> 00:32:46.200
I don't want to sign that, leading until I was

463
00:32:46.279 --> 00:32:48.359
like forced to go back to court to sign and letting.

464
00:32:49.559 --> 00:32:52.039
So so real, so real quick, so real quick. So

465
00:32:53.839 --> 00:32:55.440
that's that's what I was trying. That's what I was

466
00:32:55.480 --> 00:33:01.920
trying to say before. Like sometimes like when when a

467
00:33:02.039 --> 00:33:04.440
dude wants to be there and wants to do what

468
00:33:04.480 --> 00:33:09.079
he wants to do to support the child emotionally and

469
00:33:09.200 --> 00:33:11.720
wants to support the child, you know what I'm saying,

470
00:33:11.960 --> 00:33:15.599
in other ways other than financial, they get, they get

471
00:33:15.680 --> 00:33:17.480
they get some of this stuff, you know what I'm saying.

472
00:33:19.200 --> 00:33:23.400
But yo, well also because but that's but part of

473
00:33:23.440 --> 00:33:27.160
that is because whether we like it or not. You

474
00:33:27.160 --> 00:33:33.559
can support your children emotionally physically, but that doesn't feed them,

475
00:33:33.759 --> 00:33:37.559
that doesn't clothe them. So why does one parent have

476
00:33:37.640 --> 00:33:42.160
to be responsible for all of the financial, right and

477
00:33:42.279 --> 00:33:45.599
emotional and you only get to be there for the emotional.

478
00:33:45.680 --> 00:33:48.599
Oh wait wait, we can also bring us in real quick, right.

479
00:33:48.920 --> 00:33:52.000
So for thirteen years I was playing you know what,

480
00:33:52.039 --> 00:33:55.359
I was paying for a child that was mine but

481
00:33:55.440 --> 00:33:59.640
non existent. You see what I'm saying for thirteen years

482
00:33:59.680 --> 00:34:02.319
because because she decided to up and leave to Maryland.

483
00:34:04.279 --> 00:34:06.519
You know, So for thirteen years and your mind you

484
00:34:06.519 --> 00:34:07.880
I didn't even know where my daughter was. That the

485
00:34:07.880 --> 00:34:09.000
only thing I knew was that she knew to move

486
00:34:09.039 --> 00:34:11.440
to Maryland. I did not know, you know, like what

487
00:34:11.599 --> 00:34:13.639
part of Maryland? It was just Maryland. I knew she was.

488
00:34:13.639 --> 00:34:16.239
But did you? But did you? But did you do

489
00:34:16.320 --> 00:34:17.239
anything about it?

490
00:34:18.119 --> 00:34:19.320
Ye'all? I was trying to fight it. You know what

491
00:34:19.320 --> 00:34:19.679
I'm saying.

492
00:34:19.719 --> 00:34:22.360
Every time I try to fight it, yo, listen once

493
00:34:22.840 --> 00:34:25.199
once that you know what I'm saying. See, this is

494
00:34:25.199 --> 00:34:27.400
why this is where you know, like I put my

495
00:34:27.400 --> 00:34:29.960
foot in my mouth was from the first time that

496
00:34:30.039 --> 00:34:32.320
first apparents in court, it did me dirty for the

497
00:34:32.360 --> 00:34:37.199
rest of the times, you know, because like I'm like, yo,

498
00:34:37.320 --> 00:34:38.760
hold on, you know what I'm saying, I'm almost done.

499
00:34:38.800 --> 00:34:40.679
It's just that you know, oh yeah, oh yeah, you

500
00:34:40.719 --> 00:34:42.159
haven't been in class two weeks. I say, I'm trying

501
00:34:42.159 --> 00:34:44.920
to rearrange that because of my schedule, you know. You

502
00:34:44.960 --> 00:34:47.000
know what I'm saying, Like I like, yo, you know what,

503
00:34:47.039 --> 00:34:49.199
I kept off trying and everything. Everything that I tried

504
00:34:49.239 --> 00:34:53.400
to do, it just backfired and she ended up, you know,

505
00:34:53.480 --> 00:34:55.880
like taking me to court saying I won't sign the papers.

506
00:34:55.880 --> 00:34:57.159
You know what I'm saying for her to move, and like,

507
00:34:57.199 --> 00:34:58.760
you know, she has a better job and chance down

508
00:34:58.840 --> 00:34:59.360
there or whatever.

509
00:35:00.599 --> 00:35:03.920
So well, because she was providing to the she was

510
00:35:03.960 --> 00:35:08.079
providing to the judge that you weren't providing.

511
00:35:08.960 --> 00:35:09.760
And if I was.

512
00:35:11.559 --> 00:35:16.639
Child support, yeah, but you can so you could be yes,

513
00:35:16.719 --> 00:35:19.760
but you can be on child support and still be

514
00:35:19.920 --> 00:35:20.800
missing things.

515
00:35:20.920 --> 00:35:21.119
Right.

516
00:35:21.760 --> 00:35:24.440
And then if your mother or father, it doesn't matter

517
00:35:24.440 --> 00:35:30.000
who can prove that moving, hold on, that moving would

518
00:35:30.039 --> 00:35:35.000
benefit the child more than staying, then more than likely

519
00:35:35.079 --> 00:35:37.960
the judge is going to rule in their favor if

520
00:35:38.000 --> 00:35:39.599
the other parent doesn't agree.

521
00:35:40.320 --> 00:35:46.119
But see, now, hold on though, you know, like what

522
00:35:46.360 --> 00:35:48.280
she you know, you know that what she did and

523
00:35:48.320 --> 00:35:50.039
how she did it. I mean it was like, yo,

524
00:35:50.079 --> 00:35:51.599
you know what it was slick. I felt for the bait.

525
00:35:51.679 --> 00:35:55.440
I was stupid at the time. No, like you know,

526
00:35:55.679 --> 00:35:58.480
like I'm not gonna you know, disclosed, you know, disclose

527
00:35:58.599 --> 00:36:03.519
what she did right right, but you know, like let's

528
00:36:03.559 --> 00:36:05.679
just say, you know, like it was it was proofing

529
00:36:05.719 --> 00:36:09.239
of putting for the judge ce you know. And that's

530
00:36:09.320 --> 00:36:11.320
and that's where the anger management class and the DV

531
00:36:11.400 --> 00:36:14.559
class came from, you know, like, and I'm like DV.

532
00:36:14.760 --> 00:36:17.639
I'm like, yo, So pushing her out the way is

533
00:36:17.679 --> 00:36:19.559
domestic violence? When I'm trying to jump out the window

534
00:36:19.559 --> 00:36:20.800
because she wouldn't let me out the door?

535
00:36:22.119 --> 00:36:27.039
Mm hmm yeah, did you call the cops on someone

536
00:36:27.360 --> 00:36:29.920
without permission? Is violation?

537
00:36:32.599 --> 00:36:33.840
But all right, you know what I'm saying.

538
00:36:33.840 --> 00:36:35.639
But also, you know what when someone's trying to leave

539
00:36:35.679 --> 00:36:37.199
out the door and you and you right in front

540
00:36:37.239 --> 00:36:38.360
of it, you know what I'm saying, like holding me

541
00:36:38.440 --> 00:36:39.159
hostage or whatever.

542
00:36:39.800 --> 00:36:43.840
You know what I'm saying for an argument, But.

543
00:36:43.800 --> 00:36:47.360
I'm fortunate, right yeah, you know, like like.

544
00:36:47.159 --> 00:36:48.840
Like yo, you know what, and I'm trying to push

545
00:36:48.880 --> 00:36:51.119
you out the way so I can get out, you

546
00:36:51.159 --> 00:36:53.360
know what I'm saying. And yet you know, like I

547
00:36:53.360 --> 00:36:55.000
have I have to be forced to jump I'm saying,

548
00:36:55.079 --> 00:36:57.199
jump out the first floor window. Thank God's the first floor,

549
00:36:57.800 --> 00:36:59.400
you know, but I had to jump out the window.

550
00:37:00.199 --> 00:37:00.400
You know.

551
00:37:00.480 --> 00:37:03.800
So it was like, you know, like everything, like I'm

552
00:37:03.800 --> 00:37:07.719
telling you everything just like you know, and everything that

553
00:37:07.760 --> 00:37:10.280
could have gone wrong that day went wrong. And every

554
00:37:10.280 --> 00:37:12.440
time I went to two twelve Washington Street and North,

555
00:37:13.000 --> 00:37:13.800
it was just wrong.

556
00:37:14.320 --> 00:37:17.599
You know, like same thing with found ninety five North.

557
00:37:17.599 --> 00:37:18.920
You know what I mean. Like it was just such

558
00:37:18.960 --> 00:37:20.320
a dread. You know.

559
00:37:20.440 --> 00:37:24.400
So it's like, you know, my kids are adults now,

560
00:37:24.760 --> 00:37:26.559
you know, like like I said, my daughter just turned

561
00:37:26.559 --> 00:37:29.719
twenty one today. You know, I wish that happy birthday

562
00:37:29.920 --> 00:37:32.599
and whatnot. You know, like and like you know, we

563
00:37:33.119 --> 00:37:35.360
had a little talk that made me feel better. You know,

564
00:37:35.760 --> 00:37:39.320
it really made my day, you know, because like I'm

565
00:37:39.320 --> 00:37:40.800
still like, you know, like I have to rebuild a

566
00:37:40.840 --> 00:37:45.760
relationship where it yeah right, And it's like everything that

567
00:37:45.800 --> 00:37:48.199
I missed out on, you know, like like it hurts,

568
00:37:48.519 --> 00:37:52.679
you know what I'm saying, Like it hurts, but.

569
00:37:51.559 --> 00:37:52.880
God gave me another opportunity.

570
00:37:52.960 --> 00:37:56.719
So I mean, which is good because sometimes we don't

571
00:37:56.960 --> 00:38:02.079
as human beings, we don't always think, you know, Like

572
00:38:02.119 --> 00:38:05.440
people call me an overthinker, but being an overthinker is

573
00:38:05.480 --> 00:38:07.920
what helps me to stay out of those type of

574
00:38:07.960 --> 00:38:13.599
situations because, yeah, because you think it over and over,

575
00:38:13.679 --> 00:38:16.199
you've thought of everything, so that when we make decisions,

576
00:38:16.199 --> 00:38:21.440
When overthinkers make decisions, basically you can be guaranteed that

577
00:38:21.480 --> 00:38:25.559
whatever decision they made was is the decision that they've

578
00:38:25.599 --> 00:38:29.159
made because they've thought about all the millions of ways

579
00:38:30.400 --> 00:38:34.199
it could go wrong. So you can be sure that

580
00:38:34.239 --> 00:38:37.639
when an overthinker makes a choice, that that's really their choice,

581
00:38:38.360 --> 00:38:40.400
you know, because we've already thought about how it would

582
00:38:40.400 --> 00:38:42.920
go wrong, how it could go right, and we're sure

583
00:38:43.000 --> 00:38:46.320
that that's the decision that we want to make. But

584
00:38:46.440 --> 00:38:48.079
sometimes we do we do.

585
00:38:49.559 --> 00:38:53.000
You know what, like when I start overthinking right, you know,

586
00:38:53.079 --> 00:38:55.639
like not to be funny, but like if anyone ever

587
00:38:55.679 --> 00:39:02.280
seen what's it call it advengags defenity that that part

588
00:39:02.320 --> 00:39:04.480
with doctor strangers, like trying to figure out ways to

589
00:39:04.599 --> 00:39:06.719
you know, to be thanals. Like that's me, you know

590
00:39:06.760 --> 00:39:08.679
what I'm saying, Like like when it comes to a situation,

591
00:39:08.960 --> 00:39:10.719
I'm thinking of everything. They're trying to get every place

592
00:39:10.800 --> 00:39:16.320
covered or whatever, you know, like you know, and like, yeah,

593
00:39:16.360 --> 00:39:17.880
you know what, Like sometimes my girl will be getting

594
00:39:17.880 --> 00:39:18.239
pissed off.

595
00:39:18.239 --> 00:39:19.840
She's like, yo, why are you overthinking for I'm like,

596
00:39:19.960 --> 00:39:21.880
because you know what I'm saying.

597
00:39:22.239 --> 00:39:26.800
Because it's how people some people function. See that gets

598
00:39:26.840 --> 00:39:29.519
me because it's like all of us, every single one

599
00:39:29.559 --> 00:39:36.000
of us, have different experiences, different upbringings, different environments, different everything, right,

600
00:39:36.719 --> 00:39:40.519
and none of us we're brought up the same way.

601
00:39:40.679 --> 00:39:44.639
None of us value the same things. So the way

602
00:39:44.760 --> 00:39:48.239
we the way we act and react to things is

603
00:39:48.400 --> 00:39:52.920
going to be different. But we walk around expecting everyone

604
00:39:53.920 --> 00:39:58.280
to think, feel, and act like us, and so we

605
00:39:58.360 --> 00:40:02.840
get mad and start judging people because they don't think

606
00:40:02.920 --> 00:40:07.280
or act like us. You know, where to one person

607
00:40:07.519 --> 00:40:09.760
it means one thing, but to somebody else that means

608
00:40:09.760 --> 00:40:17.199
something totally different. You know. It's just it's just amazing

609
00:40:17.400 --> 00:40:20.679
how we get caught up in our emotions and we react.

610
00:40:20.719 --> 00:40:25.360
That's the human nature. We react due to emotion.

611
00:40:26.880 --> 00:40:32.159
But no, that's true because because you know what, I'm

612
00:40:32.159 --> 00:40:33.880
gonna tell you something funny. So like when my son

613
00:40:33.960 --> 00:40:37.360
called me that they told me that he was going

614
00:40:37.440 --> 00:40:39.360
to be a dad. I started laughing, Like that was

615
00:40:39.360 --> 00:40:42.880
like my first reaction, started laughing, right, I say, I

616
00:40:42.880 --> 00:40:45.199
think I'll call you back. So I ain't calling back

617
00:40:45.239 --> 00:40:46.840
like for like a half an hour, and he calls

618
00:40:46.880 --> 00:40:50.480
me back again. He was like that, I'm here. I'm here,

619
00:40:50.559 --> 00:40:54.679
still laughing. I'm like, I'm like, bro, you know because

620
00:40:54.719 --> 00:40:56.800
you know what, like you know, to hear that you're

621
00:40:56.800 --> 00:40:58.119
going to be a grandfather, I mean, like you know

622
00:40:58.159 --> 00:41:00.639
what I'm saying, like or grandparents in general, you know

623
00:41:00.639 --> 00:41:03.000
what I mean, Just like like.

624
00:41:03.000 --> 00:41:05.440
You guys, yo, I got I gotta, I gotta I

625
00:41:05.440 --> 00:41:08.960
gotta do. I'll be right back, hold on, just keep talking,

626
00:41:09.000 --> 00:41:09.519
keep talking.

627
00:41:09.960 --> 00:41:12.400
So so like so like you know what, like my

628
00:41:12.519 --> 00:41:18.079
reaction to certain news is laughter, you know, and and

629
00:41:18.079 --> 00:41:20.000
and like you know what, like I don't mean for

630
00:41:20.039 --> 00:41:22.079
it to you know what I'm saying, Like like I

631
00:41:22.079 --> 00:41:23.960
don't mean for it to be offensive to nobody or

632
00:41:24.039 --> 00:41:25.840
like you know, like just be like yo, you know,

633
00:41:26.440 --> 00:41:27.000
but it's just stop.

634
00:41:27.760 --> 00:41:28.519
It's how I react.

635
00:41:28.599 --> 00:41:32.000
So what was what was the feeling that caused you

636
00:41:32.119 --> 00:41:33.960
to react that way?

637
00:41:36.480 --> 00:41:38.599
Because you know what, I've seen him.

638
00:41:38.639 --> 00:41:41.119
I've seen him like you know, like days before, right,

639
00:41:41.360 --> 00:41:42.599
and like you know, like you come to this house,

640
00:41:42.599 --> 00:41:45.519
see his little sister or whatever. Right, But then like

641
00:41:45.519 --> 00:41:47.280
you know, like he stopped like you know, like coming

642
00:41:47.320 --> 00:41:49.920
around like frequenting, and I'm like hmmm. I was like,

643
00:41:49.960 --> 00:41:51.159
all right, you know what, I already know he has

644
00:41:51.159 --> 00:41:54.519
a girlfriend and stuff. Right, So, like like he passed

645
00:41:54.519 --> 00:41:56.199
by one day, I'm here looking at him and I'm

646
00:41:56.239 --> 00:41:57.039
like I'm like.

647
00:41:57.000 --> 00:41:59.119
This right, like out of aye, like this right.

648
00:41:59.599 --> 00:42:03.000
I'm like listen, you know, I said, oh, everything's good

649
00:42:03.000 --> 00:42:05.320
with you going? Yeah, all right, listen young to be

650
00:42:05.360 --> 00:42:07.280
a grandfather. And he looks at me like this, He's

651
00:42:07.280 --> 00:42:08.519
like yeah, yeah, I know that.

652
00:42:08.639 --> 00:42:11.199
I know. All right, just letting you know.

653
00:42:11.960 --> 00:42:16.119
And then he stopped coming around, right, And then like

654
00:42:16.159 --> 00:42:17.840
you know, like I'm trying to figure out why, you

655
00:42:17.840 --> 00:42:19.719
know what I'm saying, like like oh, you know what,

656
00:42:19.719 --> 00:42:22.880
he's probably busy and working and whatever. And then like

657
00:42:22.960 --> 00:42:27.639
you know that they calls me up and and like

658
00:42:28.920 --> 00:42:30.920
you know, like what's called Like you know, I'm home

659
00:42:30.960 --> 00:42:34.400
and whatnot, you know, and he's a dad, you're sitting down.

660
00:42:34.480 --> 00:42:35.920
I was like, you know what I'm saying. I was like, oh,

661
00:42:36.039 --> 00:42:38.840
hell yeah, you know, I said, what's something?

662
00:42:38.840 --> 00:42:38.960
Man?

663
00:42:38.960 --> 00:42:43.920
What you said, what you got into And he was like, yeah,

664
00:42:44.920 --> 00:42:49.719
you're going to be a grandfather. I was like like yeah,

665
00:42:50.599 --> 00:42:52.599
I said yeah, stop lying, man, you played too much.

666
00:42:52.760 --> 00:42:54.760
I'm like, look, man, but what what was the feeling?

667
00:42:54.920 --> 00:42:57.400
I mean, were you disappointed? Were you angry?

668
00:42:58.639 --> 00:43:02.280
Now? I was in shock? Right, Okay? Now, well one

669
00:43:02.280 --> 00:43:02.519
of them.

670
00:43:02.599 --> 00:43:04.599
I'm sure one of the reasons he started coming around

671
00:43:04.679 --> 00:43:07.559
was because you already made it clear to him that

672
00:43:07.559 --> 00:43:07.960
that's not.

673
00:43:08.079 --> 00:43:12.199
Exactly Yeah, now you know what it was to you know,

674
00:43:12.320 --> 00:43:18.320
like because me having a child like like around his age,

675
00:43:18.679 --> 00:43:21.519
right and not being ready for it. You know what

676
00:43:21.519 --> 00:43:23.519
I'm saying, Like I didn't want him to go through that,

677
00:43:23.960 --> 00:43:26.960
you know, like where like where like everything starts moving

678
00:43:27.519 --> 00:43:32.320
like faster, faster than what you're used to, right, So

679
00:43:32.400 --> 00:43:34.480
I don't want him to go through that, you know

680
00:43:34.519 --> 00:43:36.280
where it's like you know what I'm saying, Like everything

681
00:43:36.320 --> 00:43:38.719
like you know, like like thinks like you know, like

682
00:43:38.719 --> 00:43:41.079
like like those changes are hard, you know what I'm saying,

683
00:43:41.079 --> 00:43:45.599
Like it's hard to adapt to you know, like yeah.

684
00:43:45.440 --> 00:43:49.199
But human nature is I have to learn and fall

685
00:43:49.320 --> 00:43:50.639
on my face on my.

686
00:43:50.639 --> 00:43:53.519
Own exactly, you know, Like, and I don't want him

687
00:43:53.519 --> 00:43:54.840
to go through that unless he was ready.

688
00:43:56.320 --> 00:43:57.679
I was like, yeah, you're sure you're ready for this?

689
00:43:57.719 --> 00:44:00.480
Man, He's like, well I have to be now, Yeah,

690
00:44:00.480 --> 00:44:01.320
there's no choice.

691
00:44:01.840 --> 00:44:03.440
I would say, well, you're in love because you know,

692
00:44:03.559 --> 00:44:06.000
like I'm going through the same thing right now. So

693
00:44:07.639 --> 00:44:09.039
I'm gonna go, you know, like I'm gonna guide you

694
00:44:09.119 --> 00:44:14.559
along the way, you know. Like so, like I just

695
00:44:14.599 --> 00:44:16.480
told like so I told my sons, said, Yo, first

696
00:44:16.480 --> 00:44:19.320
things first, you know, she starts, you know, like we're her.

697
00:44:19.480 --> 00:44:21.840
You know what I'm saying, where her homemones acting up?

698
00:44:22.639 --> 00:44:28.320
Feed her? Feed her? She could be yelling at you like, yo,

699
00:44:28.320 --> 00:44:29.159
you want McDonald's.

700
00:44:30.159 --> 00:44:34.239
Oh my godness, how about I'm just loving her. Why

701
00:44:34.320 --> 00:44:35.199
is it going to be feed?

702
00:44:36.119 --> 00:44:39.119
Feed her? Feed her first? I love him? I told them.

703
00:44:39.159 --> 00:44:40.719
I told them that. You know what I'm saying.

704
00:44:40.880 --> 00:44:44.199
I say, once she's calm, you know, because I say

705
00:44:44.239 --> 00:44:47.079
because like women when they're pregnant and they have like

706
00:44:47.079 --> 00:44:51.320
this hormonal changes, it's like it's like, you know, like

707
00:44:51.360 --> 00:44:54.679
you're dealing with somebody that you never saw before, you know,

708
00:44:54.800 --> 00:45:00.239
like a different side. So you know, like what is

709
00:45:00.239 --> 00:45:01.280
a good place to start?

710
00:45:03.599 --> 00:45:06.039
Oh man, all right, okay.

711
00:45:05.920 --> 00:45:07.480
No, Like but other than that.

712
00:45:07.519 --> 00:45:09.199
I mean like that was like that was my nerves,

713
00:45:09.239 --> 00:45:11.480
like you know, like like you know, I was like, wow,

714
00:45:11.599 --> 00:45:14.119
you know, I'm you know, I'm gonna be a grandfather.

715
00:45:14.119 --> 00:45:15.639
I was like, Yo, my daughter's gonna be an honest,

716
00:45:15.639 --> 00:45:16.119
she's only.

717
00:45:16.000 --> 00:45:22.800
Two years old. Wow, you know what I mean, Like yeah.

718
00:45:22.480 --> 00:45:26.480
I'm like so, I'm like so like, I'm like, yo,

719
00:45:26.519 --> 00:45:28.800
there's gonna be a huge conflict adventuress you know, because

720
00:45:28.800 --> 00:45:35.159
I could just hear right now, Daddy there was like yo,

721
00:45:35.440 --> 00:45:38.039
leaving me salon or like back and forth. You know,

722
00:45:38.079 --> 00:45:40.039
like it's gonna be a huge conflict adventures man.

723
00:45:40.079 --> 00:45:43.239
Because but that was your fault because then nobody tell

724
00:45:43.280 --> 00:45:45.559
you to be old as dirt having more babies.

725
00:45:46.519 --> 00:45:49.960
Yeah. But you know what though, I mean I have plans.

726
00:45:50.039 --> 00:45:52.719
God had plans. Yeah, you know, if you want to

727
00:45:52.719 --> 00:45:54.960
make God laugh, go ahead, make plans.

728
00:45:55.440 --> 00:45:57.559
Yeah. But the thing is, don't ask for something if

729
00:45:57.559 --> 00:45:59.440
you're not willing to take what comes with it.

730
00:46:00.079 --> 00:46:02.760
But I'm taking what's coming with it. So I'm enjoying it.

731
00:46:03.559 --> 00:46:06.320
Oh you are now. But you're saying you're sitting here

732
00:46:06.480 --> 00:46:09.559
thinking about them fighting and and all that kind of stuff.

733
00:46:09.639 --> 00:46:11.960
I mean, I mean, yo, you know what, it's gonna

734
00:46:11.960 --> 00:46:14.559
be cute because but then it's gonna be but but

735
00:46:14.599 --> 00:46:17.079
you know what, it's gonna be a huge conflict adventures.

736
00:46:17.239 --> 00:46:18.920
So so you know what, I already got a planned

737
00:46:18.920 --> 00:46:21.719
out and I'm like, yo, listen, come here, both you

738
00:46:22.119 --> 00:46:23.239
that's somebody to grow up with.

739
00:46:24.320 --> 00:46:27.639
Yeah you know I'm gonna like, yo, get yours over here.

740
00:46:29.079 --> 00:46:31.239
Yeah, you know what you gotta I'm like, you guys

741
00:46:31.239 --> 00:46:32.159
can't be fighting each other.

742
00:46:32.159 --> 00:46:34.159
You guys gotta protect each other and watch each other's back.

743
00:46:36.159 --> 00:46:39.559
Yeah, yep, that's true. That's very true.

744
00:46:40.159 --> 00:46:42.440
The whole started it, all right.

745
00:46:42.480 --> 00:46:44.960
I don't even care who starts to make up, you

746
00:46:44.960 --> 00:46:49.840
know what I'm saying, whether they what apologize. Now, please

747
00:46:50.280 --> 00:46:57.639
let me watch the Jets losing. Please thank you?

748
00:46:57.719 --> 00:46:58.039
All right?

749
00:46:58.119 --> 00:47:01.960
So so so pepe, so peepe. All right, So I

750
00:47:02.039 --> 00:47:11.039
got I got two emails here, and we're gonna go

751
00:47:11.079 --> 00:47:14.239
over them right quick, because I'm sure the one that

752
00:47:14.480 --> 00:47:17.679
the ones that I notified, the ones that wrote the

753
00:47:17.719 --> 00:47:19.760
men that were going to be discussing them a little bit.

754
00:47:19.880 --> 00:47:27.480
So I have one here. One says no man has

755
00:47:27.639 --> 00:47:32.000
ever loved me. I'm a thirty nine year old woman.

756
00:47:32.800 --> 00:47:37.360
I've had a number of long term relationships. Three significant

757
00:47:37.360 --> 00:47:42.719
ones that were that were that I was in love

758
00:47:42.760 --> 00:47:45.639
with my oh where I was in love with my partners.

759
00:47:46.280 --> 00:47:49.880
I recently came to the realization that none of my

760
00:47:50.000 --> 00:47:54.119
partners has ever been in love with me, although I

761
00:47:54.159 --> 00:47:57.199
had been in love with them, and that's got me

762
00:47:57.440 --> 00:48:02.960
feeling absolutely worthless and unlovable. I'm not even sure. I'm

763
00:48:02.960 --> 00:48:07.320
not even sure what the question is here. I guess

764
00:48:08.079 --> 00:48:11.159
just I guess. I just want to know if others

765
00:48:11.199 --> 00:48:14.039
have been through, what others have been through, and if

766
00:48:14.079 --> 00:48:18.719
anything at all helped them. I feel like either I'm

767
00:48:18.800 --> 00:48:24.119
completely unlovable or men aren't capable of love. This is

768
00:48:24.239 --> 00:48:28.159
causing issues in my life. I've gotten to the point

769
00:48:28.199 --> 00:48:31.840
where I can't trust anyone, not even my best friend.

770
00:48:32.519 --> 00:48:35.199
I just feel like no one truly likes me at all.

771
00:48:36.039 --> 00:48:40.320
I feel like disappearing forever, And when I think about it,

772
00:48:40.559 --> 00:48:44.920
I realize I literally not one single person would care

773
00:48:45.119 --> 00:48:46.360
if I disappeared forever.

774
00:48:46.559 --> 00:48:48.719
We care. We don't want you to go nowhere.

775
00:48:49.719 --> 00:48:50.599
Hold on, hold on.

776
00:48:52.000 --> 00:48:52.480
I don't know.

777
00:48:52.599 --> 00:48:54.480
I don't know what it is about it, but I

778
00:48:54.519 --> 00:48:57.159
don't know what it is. But if you need this,

779
00:48:57.360 --> 00:48:59.440
if you read or if you read, if you read

780
00:48:59.440 --> 00:49:04.280
this much, or really thank you? Yeah, that was that.

781
00:49:05.840 --> 00:49:09.239
So I don't how can how can somebody think they're unlovable?

782
00:49:10.760 --> 00:49:15.079
Because when enough people betray you and lie to you

783
00:49:15.800 --> 00:49:20.559
and make you feel less than and that's just been

784
00:49:20.679 --> 00:49:24.719
the pattern of your life, it's very easy to feel

785
00:49:24.760 --> 00:49:25.239
that way.

786
00:49:27.039 --> 00:49:28.880
No, that is true, because you know what I mean

787
00:49:28.960 --> 00:49:31.400
that way before I'm like, yo, yo, you know what

788
00:49:31.719 --> 00:49:33.480
I used to like like yo, you know what, Like

789
00:49:33.880 --> 00:49:36.800
I was, I used to be so depressed right and

790
00:49:36.880 --> 00:49:38.840
thought that nobody loved me, you know what I'm saying,

791
00:49:39.639 --> 00:49:41.599
Like to the point where I'm like, hey, no, woman

792
00:49:41.639 --> 00:49:44.159
loves it more than the Hennessy does. And yo, you

793
00:49:44.159 --> 00:49:45.599
know what, And I would drink you know what I'm saying,

794
00:49:45.599 --> 00:49:48.119
like I'll cry in my bottle, you know, like I

795
00:49:48.199 --> 00:49:50.079
was bad drinking, you know.

796
00:49:50.079 --> 00:49:52.239
Like I would like you know, but that's how I felt.

797
00:49:52.239 --> 00:49:54.880
I felt worthless at a time, you know, like shit,

798
00:49:54.960 --> 00:49:57.159
you know what, Sometimes I feel worthless right now because

799
00:49:57.199 --> 00:50:00.239
you know of my current situation where I'm I'm not

800
00:50:00.280 --> 00:50:02.519
working right now because you know.

801
00:50:02.840 --> 00:50:06.159
Of what happened four years ago, right, But.

802
00:50:06.079 --> 00:50:08.639
That that that that doesn't that makes you feel unlovable.

803
00:50:09.559 --> 00:50:11.119
But yo, you know what something yo, you know what

804
00:50:11.239 --> 00:50:12.920
like like yo, you know what? The mind is of

805
00:50:13.039 --> 00:50:16.679
very fragile the brain. The human brain is a very

806
00:50:16.719 --> 00:50:21.400
fragile muscle. Because like once, like you know, like like

807
00:50:21.159 --> 00:50:24.199
I like I can't speak for everyone else, but like

808
00:50:24.199 --> 00:50:26.480
like my thoughts, you know what I'm saying, Like once,

809
00:50:26.559 --> 00:50:28.599
like a negative starts, you know what I'm saying, A

810
00:50:28.679 --> 00:50:31.320
negative thoughts starts like brewing in my head and I

811
00:50:31.360 --> 00:50:32.599
start thinking about it.

812
00:50:32.599 --> 00:50:35.079
It's like the jumping on from X men. It doesn't stop,

813
00:50:36.079 --> 00:50:36.280
you know.

814
00:50:37.199 --> 00:50:39.360
So it's like it's like, you know, like I have

815
00:50:39.360 --> 00:50:41.719
to constantly remind myself that yo, I'm here for a reason,

816
00:50:41.800 --> 00:50:44.519
you know, like the same way she this person has

817
00:50:44.559 --> 00:50:47.960
to constantly remind themselves that they're here for a reason, you.

818
00:50:47.920 --> 00:50:50.599
Know, right, like right, like you know, like what's your

819
00:50:50.719 --> 00:50:51.119
what's what?

820
00:50:51.239 --> 00:50:51.360
All?

821
00:50:51.440 --> 00:50:58.639
Right? So you you need to feel like you have purpose, right.

822
00:50:59.239 --> 00:51:01.039
Of course, that's what it is.

823
00:51:02.519 --> 00:51:05.599
And value.

824
00:51:05.599 --> 00:51:09.679
Okay, So for instance, right when you have a whole

825
00:51:09.719 --> 00:51:14.559
bunch of people telling you hold on, I see. Yes,

826
00:51:14.639 --> 00:51:18.960
you have to learn and love yourself first, but not

827
00:51:19.079 --> 00:51:22.559
just even just loving yourself first, but believing in yourself

828
00:51:23.079 --> 00:51:26.480
believing in all the work, believing in all the work

829
00:51:26.519 --> 00:51:30.320
that you have done for yourself, all the things you

830
00:51:30.360 --> 00:51:37.840
have accomplished, and giving that value. Right. So, the funny

831
00:51:37.880 --> 00:51:42.519
thing is when you're always like there's this saying, always

832
00:51:42.559 --> 00:51:44.280
the bridesmaid, never the bride.

833
00:51:44.679 --> 00:51:46.800
Right, So when.

834
00:51:46.639 --> 00:51:52.639
People keep telling you how nice, oh gosh, how nice

835
00:51:52.679 --> 00:51:57.440
you are, how pretty you are, you know, how sweet

836
00:51:57.480 --> 00:51:59.920
you are? You know, you get all these things about

837
00:52:00.079 --> 00:52:04.920
you're likable, you're lovable. Okay, then if that's so true,

838
00:52:05.880 --> 00:52:10.920
then why am I not likable or lovable enough for you?

839
00:52:09.639 --> 00:52:13.119
You got to look at the world and how it is.

840
00:52:13.519 --> 00:52:16.159
You know what I'm saying, like like like you know what.

841
00:52:16.320 --> 00:52:19.960
First off, you know what I'm saying, like social media,

842
00:52:20.000 --> 00:52:24.119
for example, social media may made this world such a

843
00:52:24.239 --> 00:52:29.400
vain place, you know. Like, so it's like and then

844
00:52:29.480 --> 00:52:31.719
like you know, like you're looking at you know, couples

845
00:52:31.800 --> 00:52:34.440
quote unquote right, you're looking at you know what I'm saying,

846
00:52:34.440 --> 00:52:36.519
most people looking at their lives or whatever.

847
00:52:37.960 --> 00:52:38.320
It was.

848
00:52:38.760 --> 00:52:45.280
They're looking at faith, they're looking at the picture Facebook page, example.

849
00:52:45.440 --> 00:52:47.079
Know, like like like like.

850
00:52:47.039 --> 00:52:49.559
You know what, and you know what example right, Like

851
00:52:49.639 --> 00:52:51.400
you see some couples there you know what I'm saying,

852
00:52:51.440 --> 00:52:53.960
like wearing pajamas together, you know, and they're like, yeah,

853
00:52:54.000 --> 00:52:54.760
they're so happy.

854
00:52:55.239 --> 00:52:58.000
Three you know, like three days later you know, like

855
00:52:59.440 --> 00:53:02.159
the wife is that because the husband shot him? Yeah?

856
00:53:02.880 --> 00:53:05.280
So it's like so so it's like what are you

857
00:53:05.280 --> 00:53:06.159
really looking at? You know?

858
00:53:06.280 --> 00:53:09.320
Like you also got to remember when you see those

859
00:53:09.360 --> 00:53:12.599
things and they're so beautiful, so wonderful, you have to

860
00:53:12.639 --> 00:53:20.000
ask yourself what price are they paying to get to

861
00:53:20.079 --> 00:53:22.360
that perfect picture? Right?

862
00:53:22.440 --> 00:53:25.719
Let's see, let's see, hold on, let's see. Amazon has

863
00:53:25.760 --> 00:53:31.920
matching pajamas for about fifteen ninety ninety's right, yes, so

864
00:53:31.039 --> 00:53:35.679
so then fifteen ninety ninety so that says thirty two

865
00:53:35.800 --> 00:53:39.079
and then yeah, about about forty fifty bucks if you

866
00:53:39.119 --> 00:53:41.639
count if they have prime or not with shipping it

867
00:53:41.719 --> 00:53:43.039
all depend you stop.

868
00:53:42.880 --> 00:53:49.719
Your funny But okay, so say say it's the wife,

869
00:53:50.000 --> 00:53:53.360
the wife who wants to have those pictures taken, right right?

870
00:53:55.000 --> 00:54:00.679
What does she have to sacrifice or promise to get

871
00:54:00.679 --> 00:54:02.039
the husband to agree to that?

872
00:54:02.960 --> 00:54:05.760
And I could think of a few things, but that's

873
00:54:05.920 --> 00:54:06.920
just in my head.

874
00:54:08.000 --> 00:54:12.119
No, no, even even I'm talking real stuff, Corleon. I'm

875
00:54:12.159 --> 00:54:17.880
talking real stuff, like I'm trying to think.

876
00:54:19.400 --> 00:54:24.039
What strings does she have to pull?

877
00:54:24.599 --> 00:54:30.400
You? Yeah, like did you have to promise to wash

878
00:54:30.800 --> 00:54:34.440
his draws every day? Like like what what is it?

879
00:54:34.639 --> 00:54:36.920
What price did she have to pay for that? Or

880
00:54:37.000 --> 00:54:40.679
vice versa for the man, you know, for him to

881
00:54:40.760 --> 00:54:45.599
get his wife to do something or uh do something

882
00:54:45.639 --> 00:54:49.440
he likes? Right, what price? What price does he have

883
00:54:49.519 --> 00:54:52.719
to pay or sacrifice just to get her to do

884
00:54:52.760 --> 00:54:57.039
that and make it look perfect laundry?

885
00:54:58.559 --> 00:55:01.320
You know, like I shot the you know, like look,

886
00:55:01.320 --> 00:55:03.920
you know what what like one thing like since I'm

887
00:55:03.920 --> 00:55:07.599
older now, right, and I keep saying this because it's

888
00:55:07.599 --> 00:55:10.239
the truth. Since I'm older now, you know what, Like

889
00:55:12.079 --> 00:55:15.440
those some quote unquote sacrifices to me is not really sacrifices.

890
00:55:15.480 --> 00:55:15.639
Man.

891
00:55:16.679 --> 00:55:21.119
Yeah, but not everybody is like that, Like what's good? Yeah,

892
00:55:21.119 --> 00:55:24.519
what looks good on the outside doesn't. Like there could

893
00:55:24.519 --> 00:55:29.880
be a woman who you know, is with someone because

894
00:55:30.039 --> 00:55:34.559
their stability, financial, you know, all these things. But in

895
00:55:34.679 --> 00:55:37.360
order for her to be able to have that that

896
00:55:37.559 --> 00:55:43.119
feeling of safety financial, you know, stability, he's got to

897
00:55:43.159 --> 00:55:47.880
beat her butt every day, you know, or she has

898
00:55:48.000 --> 00:55:54.320
to do some crazy messed up whatever. Like it's not

899
00:55:54.440 --> 00:55:57.880
always something as simple as cooking and cleaning. It could

900
00:55:57.880 --> 00:56:01.800
be something really really horrible like chili.

901
00:56:03.159 --> 00:56:06.760
Yeah, like you know what, my chili is good man,

902
00:56:06.800 --> 00:56:08.119
my chili's banging.

903
00:56:07.800 --> 00:56:13.159
Bro not true true, true that there's no there's no

904
00:56:13.239 --> 00:56:15.280
lies on spoken about that part.

905
00:56:15.639 --> 00:56:18.360
Well, maybe he wants you want you, all right, Maybe

906
00:56:18.360 --> 00:56:20.320
he wants you to sit down with him during football

907
00:56:20.320 --> 00:56:22.320
Sunday and football is not her thing.

908
00:56:23.639 --> 00:56:26.960
Yeah, I mean that, and that can be that can

909
00:56:27.039 --> 00:56:31.559
be difficult. Yeah, but you know, like, let me put

910
00:56:31.559 --> 00:56:34.920
it this, In order to have my ex husband dance

911
00:56:35.000 --> 00:56:39.320
with me, I had to sit for hours and watch

912
00:56:39.360 --> 00:56:41.159
him play video games.

913
00:56:42.039 --> 00:56:45.760
Like, but why not do it together?

914
00:56:47.000 --> 00:56:47.280
Huh?

915
00:56:47.639 --> 00:56:49.800
Why not do it together? That would have been fun.

916
00:56:50.599 --> 00:56:54.760
No, I hate playing video games. Oh all right, Like

917
00:56:54.920 --> 00:56:58.199
I I I tried. I tried. I really did. Because

918
00:56:58.239 --> 00:57:01.519
my thing is, you know again, I was a therapist,

919
00:57:01.599 --> 00:57:04.239
So my thing is I have to practice what I preach.

920
00:57:04.320 --> 00:57:07.920
And sometimes you have to do just because your partner

921
00:57:08.519 --> 00:57:11.239
loves it, likes it or whatever. Sometimes you have to,

922
00:57:11.400 --> 00:57:14.840
you know, sacrifice a little bit to do it for them,

923
00:57:15.119 --> 00:57:16.960
not because you like it, but just to be a

924
00:57:17.000 --> 00:57:17.960
part of it.

925
00:57:18.480 --> 00:57:19.519
Right right.

926
00:57:19.599 --> 00:57:24.960
But when that, when that becomes the norm, then you

927
00:57:25.000 --> 00:57:28.400
start to get reseampful, like, yo, why do I got

928
00:57:28.400 --> 00:57:31.400
to be doing this all the time? And you know

929
00:57:32.159 --> 00:57:35.119
you don't do what I want you you know what

930
00:57:35.199 --> 00:57:39.360
I want to do, you know, And then it just

931
00:57:39.400 --> 00:57:42.559
becomes a tip for tat back and forth. You know, well,

932
00:57:42.599 --> 00:57:44.119
I'm not doing this if you don't do.

933
00:57:44.039 --> 00:57:48.159
That, But it becomes probably you know what, you know

934
00:57:48.199 --> 00:57:51.119
what though, like for like this person that wrote the

935
00:57:51.199 --> 00:57:56.280
letter to sound like you know, like that she's not loved.

936
00:57:56.280 --> 00:57:58.400
I mean, like that's crazy to me, you know, but

937
00:57:58.440 --> 00:58:03.360
I understand it. Though it's crazy to me, but I

938
00:58:03.480 --> 00:58:05.199
understand it because you know what, I've been in those

939
00:58:05.199 --> 00:58:08.960
shoes before, you know, like like you know, like like

940
00:58:09.119 --> 00:58:11.639
you know, like and it's a horrible feeling, like you know,

941
00:58:11.760 --> 00:58:15.320
to feel like you know that you know, like you

942
00:58:15.400 --> 00:58:17.320
have it in your mind that you're worthless, you know,

943
00:58:17.400 --> 00:58:20.760
like you're backtracking on everything, like, oh everything failed around me,

944
00:58:20.800 --> 00:58:22.239
I'm worthless and this that and the third.

945
00:58:22.320 --> 00:58:25.559
So it's like I'm not even not even just feeling worthless.

946
00:58:25.599 --> 00:58:28.960
But when you're still alone, it's like, you know, like

947
00:58:29.320 --> 00:58:33.000
you're trying to prove yourself wrong. But my proof is

948
00:58:33.599 --> 00:58:36.760
here I am and I'm still alone, ye know.

949
00:58:36.960 --> 00:58:39.119
But yeah, but but see you know what though, like

950
00:58:39.800 --> 00:58:43.440
patience is always a virtue, you know, like yeah, you

951
00:58:43.480 --> 00:58:45.679
gotta be patient, you know, like like like you know what,

952
00:58:45.840 --> 00:58:51.039
like right right before my relationship, right like I came

953
00:58:51.119 --> 00:58:53.280
to terms where I'm like, yo, you know what, I'm

954
00:58:53.280 --> 00:58:55.480
all right if I die alone, you know, because like

955
00:58:55.800 --> 00:58:59.000
I actually you know, I'm making changes in my life,

956
00:58:59.079 --> 00:59:00.960
like I'm starting to like love myself again.

957
00:59:01.039 --> 00:59:04.320
Like but like I'm also like, you know, like cleaning

958
00:59:04.400 --> 00:59:04.840
up my act.

959
00:59:04.920 --> 00:59:08.480
Like I stopped drinking, you know, like you know, like

960
00:59:09.960 --> 00:59:12.639
everything started like you know, moving in the right direction,

961
00:59:12.679 --> 00:59:16.199
and the next thing, you know, you know, I have

962
00:59:16.239 --> 00:59:17.440
a girlfriend now, you know.

963
00:59:19.159 --> 00:59:22.480
You know, like I wasn't looking for it. And that's

964
00:59:22.519 --> 00:59:23.039
the funny part.

965
00:59:23.079 --> 00:59:25.159
Maybe that's what it was. You weren't looking for it.

966
00:59:25.880 --> 00:59:26.880
Yoah yo, you know.

967
00:59:26.840 --> 00:59:30.159
What I mean, you focusing on you?

968
00:59:31.079 --> 00:59:33.079
Yeah? Waitit excuse let me scratch that. You know what

969
00:59:33.079 --> 00:59:35.679
I'm saying, girlfriend, you know, like I have as soon

970
00:59:35.719 --> 00:59:36.960
to be wife at the house.

971
00:59:37.920 --> 00:59:39.159
You know what are you saying it soon to be

972
00:59:39.199 --> 00:59:39.840
ex wife? What?

973
00:59:40.760 --> 00:59:41.000
Nah?

974
00:59:41.079 --> 00:59:42.400
You know what I'm saying, I have a future ex

975
00:59:42.440 --> 00:59:46.519
wife now at the house, you know, soon to be

976
00:59:46.599 --> 00:59:49.199
wife at the house right. You know, I wasn't looking

977
00:59:49.199 --> 00:59:51.159
for it, you know, like that was the last thing

978
00:59:51.199 --> 00:59:53.119
on my mind. You know, like like me, I was

979
00:59:53.239 --> 00:59:54.719
like me, you know, like I was say, yo, you

980
00:59:54.719 --> 00:59:56.199
know what I'm doing. You know, I'm doing this that

981
00:59:56.239 --> 00:59:58.400
and the third I'm actually doing things right, you know,

982
00:59:58.519 --> 01:00:01.679
Like I started, like you know, reading the Bible, you know,

983
01:00:01.800 --> 01:00:05.440
going back to church, right, like everything's moving, you know.

984
01:00:05.440 --> 01:00:06.840
What I'm saying. Everything is moving.

985
01:00:07.559 --> 01:00:09.360
But like see the thing is, I wasn't even thinking

986
01:00:09.400 --> 01:00:11.760
about it, you know, like I was just doing it.

987
01:00:12.679 --> 01:00:14.840
You know, I called you uncle, tell you know, like

988
01:00:15.920 --> 01:00:17.599
when I hit my rock bottom part, you know, like

989
01:00:18.400 --> 01:00:20.840
when I got my duy to me, that was my

990
01:00:20.960 --> 01:00:22.719
rock bottom, you know what I'm saying, because like I mean,

991
01:00:22.760 --> 01:00:26.760
it could have been worse, right, yeah, Like I always say,

992
01:00:26.800 --> 01:00:29.280
you know, like one thing I do remember is sitting

993
01:00:29.519 --> 01:00:34.079
in the precinct right and when the when the coke

994
01:00:34.159 --> 01:00:36.920
and the and the perk and and I started sobering up,

995
01:00:36.920 --> 01:00:38.960
when all that you know left my body, like you know,

996
01:00:39.000 --> 01:00:44.239
the feeling left. I was like, bro, i am forty

997
01:00:44.239 --> 01:00:47.519
something years old and I'm still doing ship like this.

998
01:00:49.440 --> 01:00:51.840
I'm like, yo, I gotta get that terrible feeling right

999
01:00:52.320 --> 01:00:53.599
like like like I'm.

1000
01:00:53.480 --> 01:00:55.960
Like, yo, for thirty years, you know, like like yo,

1001
01:00:56.000 --> 01:00:58.519
you know what, I began to rest since I was thirteen,

1002
01:00:59.719 --> 01:01:02.079
you know, like for thirty years I've been doing this ship.

1003
01:01:02.159 --> 01:01:04.360
I'm like, Yo, something's gotta you know, something's gotta stop,

1004
01:01:04.760 --> 01:01:07.159
you know, and like I like and then yo, you

1005
01:01:07.159 --> 01:01:11.760
know what. I actually sat there right and I was like, Yo,

1006
01:01:11.800 --> 01:01:14.000
you know what, A change gotta come, you know, like

1007
01:01:14.039 --> 01:01:15.960
I'm like read on some Sam Cook stuff.

1008
01:01:16.000 --> 01:01:18.280
A change gotta come, right, yeah, But.

1009
01:01:18.239 --> 01:01:20.960
If you don't make the change, the change ain't coming.

1010
01:01:21.440 --> 01:01:24.079
Exactly, you know. So like so like.

1011
01:01:25.960 --> 01:01:27.400
And and like you know what it was like the

1012
01:01:27.400 --> 01:01:29.880
first time. I remember it was the first time I

1013
01:01:29.880 --> 01:01:35.239
felt the shame that I was like in handcuffs, you know,

1014
01:01:35.360 --> 01:01:37.719
because other times I just didn't care. I'm like, yeah, whatever,

1015
01:01:37.719 --> 01:01:39.360
you know what I'm saying, like like you know what,

1016
01:01:39.440 --> 01:01:41.400
I didn't plan things through. You know, I did what

1017
01:01:41.440 --> 01:01:47.480
I did whatever whatever, right, But you know that was

1018
01:01:47.519 --> 01:01:49.360
like the first time I felt the shame. And you

1019
01:01:49.400 --> 01:01:52.800
know what, And I'm gonna say it right here, like

1020
01:01:52.840 --> 01:01:54.559
I said all the time, I could have called a

1021
01:01:54.639 --> 01:01:56.559
drug charge too, because I had pills in my pocket

1022
01:01:56.559 --> 01:01:59.039
that they that they didn't frisk me, right, So I

1023
01:01:59.119 --> 01:02:02.440
ended up going to the bathroom right, act like I

1024
01:02:02.480 --> 01:02:04.280
was washing my face or whatever, and I swallowed those

1025
01:02:04.280 --> 01:02:04.760
pills again.

1026
01:02:05.159 --> 01:02:07.440
You know, I was like my last ones. Right.

1027
01:02:08.159 --> 01:02:10.599
The irony of that is the same pills I swallowed

1028
01:02:10.599 --> 01:02:12.599
that I was taking for fun. I actually now need

1029
01:02:12.599 --> 01:02:15.920
it for chronic back pain. I'm probably gonna need it

1030
01:02:15.960 --> 01:02:18.119
for the rest of my life. But that's either hearing it, right.

1031
01:02:20.679 --> 01:02:22.159
So I got a question for you. I got a

1032
01:02:22.239 --> 01:02:22.719
question for.

1033
01:02:22.719 --> 01:02:25.719
You then, so you know what, like I sobered up though,

1034
01:02:26.280 --> 01:02:30.159
you know, and all, you know, all this happened like

1035
01:02:30.159 --> 01:02:32.599
like like, look, you know what what.

1036
01:02:32.559 --> 01:02:38.280
I'm trying to say, is this right? Whet that question?

1037
01:02:39.559 --> 01:02:40.880
Isn't it funny?

1038
01:02:41.239 --> 01:02:42.199
No? No? You know what?

1039
01:02:42.559 --> 01:02:46.159
Real quick, when you stop yelling, you know what, when

1040
01:02:46.199 --> 01:02:48.000
you start like, you know, like trying to you know,

1041
01:02:48.039 --> 01:02:51.119
like like making changes and look at the positive of

1042
01:02:51.199 --> 01:02:55.039
what you could do, write everything else the so called failures,

1043
01:02:55.039 --> 01:02:58.039
you feel like you know, it doesn't it doesn't matter.

1044
01:02:59.400 --> 01:03:02.320
You know it doesn't matter, because hell, you know what

1045
01:03:02.400 --> 01:03:04.199
I feel. Plenty of times I keep failing, and you

1046
01:03:04.239 --> 01:03:05.719
know what, it doesn't matter. You want to why people

1047
01:03:05.960 --> 01:03:10.599
fail forward. Take that failure added and you know your life.

1048
01:03:10.679 --> 01:03:13.320
I'm move forward, bro, exactly.

1049
01:03:13.400 --> 01:03:15.519
You know, like what choice do we have?

1050
01:03:16.840 --> 01:03:18.480
Yeah? So let me let me ask you a question.

1051
01:03:18.599 --> 01:03:20.400
So at this point in your life, you feel like

1052
01:03:20.480 --> 01:03:26.320
you love yourself? Yeah, feeling do you feel you have purpose?

1053
01:03:26.440 --> 01:03:26.679
Now?

1054
01:03:27.800 --> 01:03:29.599
I feel I have purpose? But right now, you know,

1055
01:03:29.599 --> 01:03:32.119
I'm gonna be honest. Right now, I've been feeling kind

1056
01:03:32.119 --> 01:03:37.920
of down because right now I'm feeling like less of

1057
01:03:37.960 --> 01:03:40.400
a man. Right now, I'm sitting on the sidelines.

1058
01:03:40.880 --> 01:03:42.599
It's great.

1059
01:03:42.920 --> 01:03:45.519
No, no, no, exactly, it is you know, like and

1060
01:03:45.519 --> 01:03:47.599
and you know what, and I'm gonna miss something real quick.

1061
01:03:48.719 --> 01:03:50.280
This is you know, I gotta put a ladd on

1062
01:03:50.360 --> 01:03:51.559
for this one. Right.

1063
01:03:52.320 --> 01:03:57.760
So, my pride in my ego would not It still

1064
01:03:57.800 --> 01:04:01.440
doesn't allow me to accept the fact that I'm injured permanently,

1065
01:04:02.800 --> 01:04:09.079
right it doesn't, you know. And I'm here looking at

1066
01:04:09.079 --> 01:04:12.880
my girl, you know, my girl go to work, come home, right,

1067
01:04:14.079 --> 01:04:15.760
and I'm saying to myself, I was like, yo, you

1068
01:04:15.800 --> 01:04:20.760
know what, it shouldn't be this way, right, and like

1069
01:04:21.719 --> 01:04:27.440
that's when the negative thoughts start, you know, rumbling, and

1070
01:04:27.480 --> 01:04:29.679
then like you know, like I'm going through like you know,

1071
01:04:29.800 --> 01:04:31.840
like stuff right now. And you know, I'm not going

1072
01:04:31.920 --> 01:04:35.679
to say on here, but that's one of them, you know, Like,

1073
01:04:36.559 --> 01:04:38.639
but I do know it's my pride in my ego,

1074
01:04:39.480 --> 01:04:42.599
you know, I know that, you know, like I want

1075
01:04:42.639 --> 01:04:44.760
to be I want to be in the fields working,

1076
01:04:44.920 --> 01:04:47.119
you know, like the way way wait, Paul scratched that.

1077
01:04:47.199 --> 01:04:49.039
I mean I want to be out there working.

1078
01:04:49.480 --> 01:04:51.679
I really do that. That sounds kind of crazy what

1079
01:04:51.719 --> 01:04:52.280
he just said.

1080
01:04:52.679 --> 01:04:54.679
Yeah, I want to be in the field working, you know,

1081
01:04:54.760 --> 01:04:57.159
like and I gotta hi, Rob, let me scratch that,

1082
01:04:57.679 --> 01:05:00.079
you know, like no, you know what I'm saying, like

1083
01:05:00.320 --> 01:05:03.639
like yo, no that say, ain't going with me. But

1084
01:05:05.159 --> 01:05:06.840
I mean, like, yo, you know what, I want to

1085
01:05:06.840 --> 01:05:10.320
be out there working again, but due to you.

1086
01:05:10.280 --> 01:05:13.760
Know, circumstances beyond your control.

1087
01:05:13.960 --> 01:05:17.840
Yeah, yeah, you know, do the circumstances beyond my control

1088
01:05:17.920 --> 01:05:20.880
right now? You know, like I have to wait and

1089
01:05:21.480 --> 01:05:24.840
playing this long game is like it's draining, you know,

1090
01:05:24.960 --> 01:05:27.880
like and that's that's nothing that gets me too. You know,

1091
01:05:28.000 --> 01:05:34.159
it's draining and that's what makes me feel like less

1092
01:05:34.199 --> 01:05:34.960
of right now.

1093
01:05:36.079 --> 01:05:37.760
But but you know.

1094
01:05:37.800 --> 01:05:41.360
Like with my situation, we're in the fourth quarter, you know,

1095
01:05:41.400 --> 01:05:47.760
we're two minutes left. So I mean, I know something

1096
01:05:47.800 --> 01:05:51.079
that's gonna come from it. It's all about how long

1097
01:05:51.119 --> 01:05:55.000
can I withstand? And like sometimes like I just don't

1098
01:05:55.039 --> 01:05:58.599
have the I don't I don't think. I don't think

1099
01:05:58.599 --> 01:06:00.719
I have enough fighting me for it no more, man,

1100
01:06:01.480 --> 01:06:06.920
you know, because like but however, I still got to

1101
01:06:07.000 --> 01:06:09.400
keep pushing because you know what I got, you know,

1102
01:06:10.079 --> 01:06:12.440
I have a you know what I'm saying, A beautiful

1103
01:06:12.840 --> 01:06:13.079
for you.

1104
01:06:14.119 --> 01:06:15.039
Yeah, no, don't say that.

1105
01:06:15.360 --> 01:06:18.719
Don't say that, you know right now, you know my

1106
01:06:18.760 --> 01:06:20.480
name ain't good right now, I don't say that.

1107
01:06:20.960 --> 01:06:22.800
But but but.

1108
01:06:24.880 --> 01:06:26.920
It's just that, yo, you know what Like sometimes you know,

1109
01:06:27.000 --> 01:06:31.199
like like I wake up and I'll be like, you know,

1110
01:06:31.239 --> 01:06:31.840
like I'm miss the.

1111
01:06:31.960 --> 01:06:35.480
Mom, you know, like you no, no, mister mom.

1112
01:06:36.199 --> 01:06:38.079
Now but now now but hold on listen though, But

1113
01:06:38.360 --> 01:06:41.320
and then like you know, I'm onto my girl, you know,

1114
01:06:42.400 --> 01:06:45.079
you know, wake up at you know, six o'clock, you know,

1115
01:06:45.320 --> 01:06:49.440
be out by seven, come on at three tired, right,

1116
01:06:51.000 --> 01:06:54.079
And like I'm like, yo, you know what you're missing?

1117
01:06:54.119 --> 01:06:57.000
You know, like she's I feel bad because she's missing

1118
01:06:57.079 --> 01:07:01.320
the most important part of motherhood and I'm here watching it.

1119
01:07:02.920 --> 01:07:06.159
You know, the most important part of fatherhood.

1120
01:07:06.239 --> 01:07:08.159
Bro. Yeah, true, you.

1121
01:07:08.119 --> 01:07:10.360
Know, but like but like you know what, it bothers

1122
01:07:10.360 --> 01:07:11.880
me because you know what I wish we could Like

1123
01:07:13.199 --> 01:07:13.800
I wish.

1124
01:07:13.559 --> 01:07:17.960
I could be out there working and helping, right, you know, like.

1125
01:07:18.119 --> 01:07:20.599
But what realizes you are helping?

1126
01:07:21.280 --> 01:07:23.360
I am, But like you know what though like like

1127
01:07:23.360 --> 01:07:25.039
like you know, like that part, you know when it

1128
01:07:25.039 --> 01:07:26.880
comes to bills and all that stuff, you know, to

1129
01:07:26.880 --> 01:07:29.320
watch my girls stress, you know, like and I could

1130
01:07:29.360 --> 01:07:30.599
barely do much because.

1131
01:07:30.360 --> 01:07:32.480
Workers compigence, you know, worker's COMPI and shit.

1132
01:07:33.119 --> 01:07:34.920
You know, like I kind of like, you know, I

1133
01:07:34.960 --> 01:07:36.360
am kind of lucky that you know, I get a

1134
01:07:36.440 --> 01:07:40.679
veterans check, but I ain't. That ain't enough either, you know,

1135
01:07:40.800 --> 01:07:44.000
like it's like you know, like the bills are stepping

1136
01:07:44.079 --> 01:07:47.800
up and I still.

1137
01:07:47.559 --> 01:07:48.639
Have to play the sideline.

1138
01:07:49.880 --> 01:07:54.400
And it's like that's what my though, my private ego

1139
01:07:54.480 --> 01:07:56.719
kick sendo on that part because you know what, if

1140
01:07:56.719 --> 01:07:58.960
it was up to me, if it was up to me,

1141
01:08:00.280 --> 01:08:02.039
my girl will be staying home. If you want to work,

1142
01:08:02.079 --> 01:08:04.880
you go ahead and work, you know, like mhm. But

1143
01:08:05.039 --> 01:08:07.599
if I can, if I could handle it, I'll handle it.

1144
01:08:09.639 --> 01:08:11.800
In this economy, can't nobody.

1145
01:08:11.400 --> 01:08:15.159
No exactly exactly but like but like you know, like

1146
01:08:15.239 --> 01:08:16.600
if I could, like if it was up to me,

1147
01:08:17.319 --> 01:08:20.520
you know, like you know, and and you know what,

1148
01:08:20.600 --> 01:08:22.279
and it's not on something like yo, you know, like

1149
01:08:22.439 --> 01:08:23.560
oh you don't want your girl work.

1150
01:08:23.760 --> 01:08:24.560
No, No, it's not that.

1151
01:08:24.600 --> 01:08:28.239
It's that, you know, like I'd rather you know, like

1152
01:08:28.760 --> 01:08:32.399
carry the brunt of and you handle you know what

1153
01:08:32.560 --> 01:08:34.600
you need to handle. And if you do, you know,

1154
01:08:34.720 --> 01:08:38.159
like I guess, you know what, I guess some type

1155
01:08:38.159 --> 01:08:39.960
of my cheese or stuff or whatever. You know, like

1156
01:08:40.479 --> 01:08:42.159
but I grew up, but you know what, I grew

1157
01:08:42.199 --> 01:08:44.479
up watching my father back you know, you know, like

1158
01:08:45.119 --> 01:08:49.720
my father was taking care of the whole family at

1159
01:08:49.720 --> 01:08:53.119
one point in time because my mom wasn't working. You know,

1160
01:08:53.199 --> 01:08:54.680
like when I was young, I remember like you know,

1161
01:08:55.199 --> 01:08:58.920
like you know, like we were good, you know, and

1162
01:08:59.039 --> 01:09:02.520
I learned that from my and my dad, you know.

1163
01:09:02.640 --> 01:09:06.520
And it's like this something I want to do. And

1164
01:09:07.199 --> 01:09:11.880
because talking to you be oh I can't read. Oh

1165
01:09:12.039 --> 01:09:15.880
it's just dubs, just think what you.

1166
01:09:16.920 --> 01:09:20.359
Absolutely no, no, and you know what it's gonna work out.

1167
01:09:20.479 --> 01:09:22.520
You know. It's just that, you know, it's just that

1168
01:09:22.600 --> 01:09:25.319
you know, like right now, you know, like you know, like.

1169
01:09:27.199 --> 01:09:30.880
Exactly and you know what though, and it's my pride

1170
01:09:30.880 --> 01:09:35.479
in my ego that use those thoughts. You know, no

1171
01:09:35.560 --> 01:09:37.800
one you know, no one don't knowing damn true and

1172
01:09:37.880 --> 01:09:42.680
well that you know I'm sidelined for a reason, you know,

1173
01:09:44.560 --> 01:09:47.000
like you know, knowing damn true and well that I'm

1174
01:09:47.000 --> 01:09:48.760
sidelined for a reason. But yet you know, like I

1175
01:09:48.800 --> 01:09:51.520
want to be out there, but I have to wait,

1176
01:09:51.680 --> 01:09:53.439
you know, like I played a long time, long enough,

1177
01:09:53.720 --> 01:09:56.760
like so you know, but other than that, I mean,

1178
01:09:57.279 --> 01:10:04.199
I still love myself though, you know, yeah, yeah, yeah, lord,

1179
01:10:04.239 --> 01:10:09.760
I'm mercing, you know, like like like you know what,

1180
01:10:09.840 --> 01:10:11.359
I still love myself. What I'm trying to say to

1181
01:10:11.439 --> 01:10:15.680
the person that wrote that man, like the person I

1182
01:10:15.680 --> 01:10:18.880
wrote that, man like you gotta love yourself first, you know,

1183
01:10:19.199 --> 01:10:21.640
love yourself and believe in yourself, you know, and stop

1184
01:10:21.680 --> 01:10:24.600
looking at that you know, nobody loves me part, you

1185
01:10:24.640 --> 01:10:27.560
know what I'm saying, because like the person in the

1186
01:10:27.560 --> 01:10:31.159
mirrorand that's who you should be concerned about the most

1187
01:10:32.119 --> 01:10:33.279
that you know what I'm saying. If you love that

1188
01:10:33.279 --> 01:10:35.199
person in the mirror, done anything else, you know what

1189
01:10:35.199 --> 01:10:37.800
I'm saying, everything else would really you know what I'm saying,

1190
01:10:37.800 --> 01:10:42.960
like it really wouldn't matter, you know, because that person

1191
01:10:43.000 --> 01:10:46.960
in the mirror dictates you know what I'm saying, everything

1192
01:10:46.960 --> 01:10:49.840
about you. It all starts with you and it spreads out.

1193
01:10:50.880 --> 01:10:54.479
Yeah. Man, you you know like you radiate that ship,

1194
01:10:54.479 --> 01:10:56.439
you know what I mean. You know, like, damn I

1195
01:10:56.479 --> 01:10:58.239
just cursed again. Damn it.

1196
01:11:00.119 --> 01:11:03.760
You know what another thing too, And and Doc thought that.

1197
01:11:04.560 --> 01:11:06.920
I mean, you could you could either disagree with me

1198
01:11:06.960 --> 01:11:07.520
or agree with me.

1199
01:11:08.239 --> 01:11:08.760
Call le owned.

1200
01:11:08.800 --> 01:11:10.520
You could either disagree with me or agree with me.

1201
01:11:10.600 --> 01:11:16.159
But like, but like you know, like you are energy,

1202
01:11:16.680 --> 01:11:19.000
you know what I'm saying. That's why you know, like

1203
01:11:19.079 --> 01:11:21.119
when that's why when you go to certain places you

1204
01:11:21.199 --> 01:11:22.119
catch a bad vibe.

1205
01:11:22.479 --> 01:11:24.960
Is the energy that's you know, seeing permeating from other people.

1206
01:11:25.359 --> 01:11:25.560
You know.

1207
01:11:25.600 --> 01:11:28.279
So the energy you put out right, whether it be

1208
01:11:28.319 --> 01:11:30.560
on social media or whether it be in person, it's

1209
01:11:30.840 --> 01:11:34.119
you know, you're gonna attract the same people, you know,

1210
01:11:34.199 --> 01:11:36.159
whether whether you like it or not.

1211
01:11:37.119 --> 01:11:39.239
You know, like laws of attraction.

1212
01:11:39.840 --> 01:11:43.119
So I mean, perfect example, right, I was getting in

1213
01:11:43.119 --> 01:11:45.680
trouble up here in high school, so my parents sent

1214
01:11:45.760 --> 01:11:48.079
me down to Miami to go love with my brother.

1215
01:11:48.479 --> 01:11:51.359
May God bless his soul right to finish high school

1216
01:11:51.359 --> 01:11:54.840
down there, right, I felt some type of way. I

1217
01:11:54.840 --> 01:11:57.479
feel like I was abandoned, you know, like you just

1218
01:11:57.520 --> 01:11:59.479
ship me off or whatever. I didn't look at the

1219
01:11:59.520 --> 01:12:01.079
long game part. You know what I'm saying now that

1220
01:12:01.119 --> 01:12:04.680
I'm now that I'm older, I totally understand, right, Like,

1221
01:12:04.760 --> 01:12:06.199
you know, they'll hope for a change of scene to me,

1222
01:12:06.279 --> 01:12:10.279
will change things, right, but all the day because you

1223
01:12:10.279 --> 01:12:11.840
know what, I wasn't willing to change.

1224
01:12:12.000 --> 01:12:15.439
I attracted the same people that that was up.

1225
01:12:15.359 --> 01:12:24.119
Here, you and your mother friends brot, yo, you know what.

1226
01:12:24.239 --> 01:12:28.640
But but but the truth is like it's like, yo,

1227
01:12:28.680 --> 01:12:31.680
you know what, I attracted the same exactly.

1228
01:12:34.720 --> 01:12:36.439
You know what, though I tracked the same people.

1229
01:12:39.600 --> 01:12:41.920
I tried to the same people with with just different

1230
01:12:41.960 --> 01:12:43.479
face with different faces.

1231
01:12:43.520 --> 01:12:44.680
That's it, you know.

1232
01:12:45.279 --> 01:12:48.399
But it's the energy you put out there though, And

1233
01:12:48.439 --> 01:12:50.399
like it took me a long time to figure that

1234
01:12:50.439 --> 01:12:51.039
one out too.

1235
01:12:51.880 --> 01:12:56.279
Yeah alright, So so so it's like, you know what,

1236
01:12:57.640 --> 01:13:00.600
this person really has to start believing in herself, right,

1237
01:13:00.760 --> 01:13:02.880
absolutely love herself.

1238
01:13:02.439 --> 01:13:04.760
Because you know what, if she does that, you know,

1239
01:13:04.920 --> 01:13:09.039
everything around here will change, you know, like the view

1240
01:13:09.159 --> 01:13:12.119
like you know what her views will change.

1241
01:13:13.720 --> 01:13:17.119
Is the more we the more we value ourselves, the

1242
01:13:17.119 --> 01:13:20.079
more we care about ourselves. The funny thing is, the

1243
01:13:20.159 --> 01:13:22.920
less we give a crap about what other people think

1244
01:13:22.960 --> 01:13:26.600
and feel about us, we don't put up The funny

1245
01:13:26.600 --> 01:13:29.600
thing is when we don't put up with people's junk,

1246
01:13:30.439 --> 01:13:36.640
when we value who we are as a person, you know, absolutely,

1247
01:13:37.640 --> 01:13:41.399
because then you're not afraid to lose anybody because you

1248
01:13:41.560 --> 01:13:45.600
know that, despite other people's ability to see your value,

1249
01:13:46.159 --> 01:13:49.359
it doesn't change. And so once you can realize that

1250
01:13:49.479 --> 01:13:51.880
and feel that, and it does take a while to

1251
01:13:51.920 --> 01:13:54.319
get there, you have to do a lot of self awareness,

1252
01:13:55.079 --> 01:13:59.399
you know, self retrospection and you know, look really taking

1253
01:13:59.439 --> 01:14:00.039
people look at.

1254
01:14:00.000 --> 01:14:01.560
It's a big worry retrospection.

1255
01:14:01.880 --> 01:14:07.560
It's the fifty word. You really, you really do get

1256
01:14:07.640 --> 01:14:10.960
tired of putting up with other people's stuff, and it

1257
01:14:11.039 --> 01:14:15.119
becomes so much easier to just live it alone.

1258
01:14:15.520 --> 01:14:18.560
Yeah, so real quick, hold up, hold up, lady G

1259
01:14:18.720 --> 01:14:20.000
real quick, lady J real quick.

1260
01:14:20.079 --> 01:14:20.199
Right.

1261
01:14:20.199 --> 01:14:22.079
I'm pretty sure back then you was like, you know,

1262
01:14:22.439 --> 01:14:25.199
when the person wanted to leave right, back then, before

1263
01:14:25.239 --> 01:14:29.079
you know, you discovered you know, your self love, right,

1264
01:14:30.199 --> 01:14:31.680
I'm pretty sure you was like, you know, when the

1265
01:14:31.680 --> 01:14:33.279
person wanted to leave you begger than the state.

1266
01:14:33.800 --> 01:14:34.000
Now.

1267
01:14:34.119 --> 01:14:35.640
You know, if a person wants to leave in your life,

1268
01:14:35.720 --> 01:14:37.880
you're be like, all right, I hold the door before you.

1269
01:14:38.000 --> 01:14:46.000
Yeah, because it's not their season exactly, double double.

1270
01:14:47.840 --> 01:14:52.319
Yeah, but real quick, yeh, finish your thought on my back,

1271
01:14:52.399 --> 01:14:54.319
gam and finish your thought.

1272
01:14:54.800 --> 01:14:56.039
It was all good, bro, it was all good.

1273
01:14:56.319 --> 01:14:58.239
It's like you know what, like like you know what,

1274
01:14:58.600 --> 01:15:00.079
like you know what, once upon a time it's to

1275
01:15:00.159 --> 01:15:01.920
be like, yo, don't leave whatever, because I was scared

1276
01:15:01.920 --> 01:15:04.479
to be alone, like if my girl, if my girl

1277
01:15:04.560 --> 01:15:07.439
was to leave right now, you know, as as hurtful

1278
01:15:07.439 --> 01:15:10.439
as it will be, right, because I'm not going to

1279
01:15:10.479 --> 01:15:11.600
say that, you know, you know.

1280
01:15:11.600 --> 01:15:14.800
Like you know, nobody's saying. It's not gonna hear.

1281
01:15:15.600 --> 01:15:19.800
As herful as it would be, right, Like, if that's

1282
01:15:19.840 --> 01:15:21.159
what you want to do, I'm not gonna stop you.

1283
01:15:21.880 --> 01:15:24.760
Yeah, you know, like because we.

1284
01:15:24.800 --> 01:15:27.680
Are on our grown people ship, you know, we.

1285
01:15:27.720 --> 01:15:30.359
Know our worth and that doesn't change just because somebody

1286
01:15:30.439 --> 01:15:33.279
walks out right, So real.

1287
01:15:33.159 --> 01:15:37.479
Quick, to all the fans listening and watching the show

1288
01:15:37.600 --> 01:15:40.680
right now, we got a contest going on. Go over

1289
01:15:40.720 --> 01:15:44.520
to the Facebook fan page, look for the for the

1290
01:15:44.640 --> 01:15:47.560
for the link that says I don't know what the

1291
01:15:47.560 --> 01:15:48.439
fuck it says?

1292
01:15:49.319 --> 01:15:50.039
You crushed again?

1293
01:15:50.960 --> 01:15:51.239
Ship?

1294
01:15:51.439 --> 01:15:57.359
Oh damn? Yeah, yeah, we.

1295
01:15:57.479 --> 01:16:00.560
Will be so rich if we charged him every time,

1296
01:16:01.479 --> 01:16:01.880
he said.

1297
01:16:03.720 --> 01:16:08.039
Yeah, So go go over to the Facebook fan page.

1298
01:16:08.680 --> 01:16:13.319
Vote enter the contest. The instructions are there. What you

1299
01:16:13.399 --> 01:16:18.319
gotta do to win something. There's four prizes and yeah,

1300
01:16:18.399 --> 01:16:20.239
so you get a prize and all this other stuff

1301
01:16:20.279 --> 01:16:24.239
and and and and shipp and everything and just just

1302
01:16:24.399 --> 01:16:25.159
I can't help it.

1303
01:16:25.239 --> 01:16:29.560
I can't help it.

1304
01:16:29.840 --> 01:16:32.560
Yeah, so just go to the Facebook fan page. Man

1305
01:16:33.359 --> 01:16:39.439
over there, go over there, do what you gotta do

1306
01:16:39.479 --> 01:16:43.399
to g win yourself a prize. Just follow the instructions

1307
01:16:43.399 --> 01:16:45.840
and you'll know, you know, you'll you'll get your win something.

1308
01:16:46.279 --> 01:16:48.720
So anyway, so now the last, the last email of

1309
01:16:48.720 --> 01:16:53.720
the night. How do I approach my fiance about accusations

1310
01:16:53.760 --> 01:17:00.840
made by an anonymous account? All right, so, hello, I

1311
01:17:00.960 --> 01:17:03.840
just need a little bit of advice. My fiance and

1312
01:17:03.880 --> 01:17:07.640
I have been together for five years and gazed just

1313
01:17:07.760 --> 01:17:11.560
over two. We've had some ups and downs, mostly due

1314
01:17:11.640 --> 01:17:15.560
to his jealousy, but we've been doing very well recently,

1315
01:17:16.279 --> 01:17:20.520
or so I thought. Or so I thought. So. He

1316
01:17:20.720 --> 01:17:23.000
was out a couple of nights ago, having drinks to

1317
01:17:23.079 --> 01:17:27.359
some colleagues and came around and came home around two

1318
01:17:27.359 --> 01:17:31.520
o'clock in the morning drunk. Not unusual. He always comes

1319
01:17:31.560 --> 01:17:36.199
home very drunk after a night out. Everything seemed okay

1320
01:17:36.279 --> 01:17:40.279
until the day after when I received a message from

1321
01:17:40.319 --> 01:17:44.359
an anonymous profile on Facebook saying he had been trying

1322
01:17:44.439 --> 01:17:47.600
to go home with some nineteen year old girl. They

1323
01:17:47.760 --> 01:17:52.600
mentioned behaviors that definitely sound like him, but they won't

1324
01:17:52.640 --> 01:17:56.520
give me any names as to who they are nor

1325
01:17:57.039 --> 01:17:59.960
who the girl is. I have a bad feeling about

1326
01:18:00.039 --> 01:18:02.840
out this, but I know if I do ask him

1327
01:18:02.880 --> 01:18:06.319
about it, it will turn into a massive argument and

1328
01:18:06.359 --> 01:18:09.199
he will then accuse me of cheating on him, so

1329
01:18:09.359 --> 01:18:13.279
things will go south, even if the claims the anonymous

1330
01:18:13.319 --> 01:18:17.439
profile made are untrue. Any suggestions on how to bring

1331
01:18:17.560 --> 01:18:20.960
this up to my partner without it blowing.

1332
01:18:20.800 --> 01:18:24.159
Up, Well, first off, you know what I'm saying.

1333
01:18:24.159 --> 01:18:25.680
I don't understand how you know what I'm saying, Like,

1334
01:18:25.720 --> 01:18:29.000
why you would engaged to like like three red flags

1335
01:18:29.000 --> 01:18:32.960
in a row jealous Yeah, Like.

1336
01:18:33.359 --> 01:18:35.960
But jealousy can be healthy, so don't go there.

1337
01:18:37.680 --> 01:18:41.520
Yeah, listen, you know what, but that type of jealousy though,

1338
01:18:41.600 --> 01:18:44.000
where like you argue that's not healthy.

1339
01:18:44.319 --> 01:18:47.720
No, that's not like jealous what can be healthy?

1340
01:18:48.000 --> 01:18:49.880
Yes, you're right, you know what I'm saying, Like like

1341
01:18:49.920 --> 01:18:52.159
for instance, like my girl knows how to bake chicken.

1342
01:18:52.720 --> 01:18:56.199
I try baking chicken. You know what I'm saying, and

1343
01:18:56.239 --> 01:18:56.840
you burned it.

1344
01:18:57.000 --> 01:19:00.720
Yeah, absolutely, you know what I'm saying, because like you know,

1345
01:19:01.399 --> 01:19:02.560
I mean, I try to blame.

1346
01:19:02.640 --> 01:19:04.880
I'll try to blame. I try to blame my daughter.

1347
01:19:06.039 --> 01:19:07.159
You know she did this.

1348
01:19:07.239 --> 01:19:08.560
You know what I'm saying, But it's actually my fault.

1349
01:19:08.640 --> 01:19:11.199
I mean, like whatever, So I'm saying, so.

1350
01:19:11.119 --> 01:19:14.199
What do you think what's the other red flag besides

1351
01:19:14.239 --> 01:19:18.319
of jealousy? The you said three that yo?

1352
01:19:18.359 --> 01:19:20.239
You know what, like you know, they know the fact

1353
01:19:20.239 --> 01:19:22.399
that you know, like my man, like you know, you know,

1354
01:19:22.520 --> 01:19:23.720
go listen, you know what.

1355
01:19:24.000 --> 01:19:26.760
I'm three o'clock and two o'clock in the morning.

1356
01:19:27.319 --> 01:19:30.000
Yeah, you know. And then like you know, the third

1357
01:19:30.000 --> 01:19:35.239
one is the fact that you know this anonymous you

1358
01:19:35.279 --> 01:19:40.439
know whatever whatever, anonymous whatever, anonymous stuff that you know,

1359
01:19:40.720 --> 01:19:42.439
whatever the case may be, like whether it's a letter

1360
01:19:42.520 --> 01:19:45.680
or Facebook post or no Facebook post or like was

1361
01:19:45.680 --> 01:19:46.439
it an email or.

1362
01:19:48.000 --> 01:19:52.239
Facebook a message to Facebook? All right? Anonymously right, So.

1363
01:19:54.880 --> 01:19:57.840
And the fact that you know they you know, it

1364
01:19:57.960 --> 01:20:00.479
details his behavior patterns when you drinking.

1365
01:20:02.600 --> 01:20:07.880
Yeah, all right, you know what that right there? You

1366
01:20:07.920 --> 01:20:08.479
know what I'm saying.

1367
01:20:10.039 --> 01:20:11.880
She needs to take that with a grain assault, like, yo,

1368
01:20:11.960 --> 01:20:14.279
that was actually him, because you know what, there is

1369
01:20:14.399 --> 01:20:18.159
no way right now that you know what I'm saying,

1370
01:20:18.239 --> 01:20:23.560
a post anonymously comes, you know, detailing everything.

1371
01:20:24.279 --> 01:20:27.840
You know what I'm saying, like behavioral patterns, behavior habits, you.

1372
01:20:27.800 --> 01:20:30.680
Know, and besides that, you know what, as far as

1373
01:20:30.680 --> 01:20:33.680
that person is concerned, it's probably someone close to him exactly.

1374
01:20:33.680 --> 01:20:36.399
I was just thinking that. I was just thinking that.

1375
01:20:36.399 --> 01:20:38.199
That's like, yo, you know what. You know what I'm saying, like,

1376
01:20:39.079 --> 01:20:40.920
oh man, you know what, like he's doing this girl.

1377
01:20:40.960 --> 01:20:41.479
You know what I'm saying.

1378
01:20:41.520 --> 01:20:43.119
She says, a nice girl doing him two dirt like

1379
01:20:43.159 --> 01:20:44.479
you know it got soft heart and whatever.

1380
01:20:45.159 --> 01:20:47.239
It's like, Yo, you know what heart he wants to

1381
01:20:47.239 --> 01:20:49.039
get in her pants himself.

1382
01:20:49.159 --> 01:20:51.319
Or that too, you know what I'm saying, one of

1383
01:20:51.359 --> 01:20:56.680
the two, you know, Like, but yeah, you know what,

1384
01:20:56.800 --> 01:20:58.520
and now if he turns around start put you know

1385
01:20:58.520 --> 01:21:02.039
what I'm saying, if she knows how he is, and

1386
01:21:02.039 --> 01:21:04.039
he's gonna try to like you know, like gasline and

1387
01:21:04.159 --> 01:21:05.279
self project.

1388
01:21:05.479 --> 01:21:08.359
You know, onto you then you already know the answer.

1389
01:21:09.319 --> 01:21:11.680
Yeah, what do you think really g.

1390
01:21:14.079 --> 01:21:20.680
Well, well, like I said, I think some level of

1391
01:21:21.119 --> 01:21:29.680
jealousy is you know, it's healthy. You definitely have to

1392
01:21:29.840 --> 01:21:37.640
approach it one with respect, but also with concern yeah,

1393
01:21:37.720 --> 01:21:44.399
and reiterating uh yeah, reiterating that you know, you guys

1394
01:21:44.520 --> 01:21:50.159
are a team. You know, no blaming, no, you know,

1395
01:21:50.399 --> 01:21:54.680
accusing until you have facts, because a lot of people

1396
01:21:54.760 --> 01:21:57.000
do that. They speak out of their feelings, They speak

1397
01:21:57.000 --> 01:22:02.359
out of anger and fear. Sometimes it is what they

1398
01:22:02.439 --> 01:22:04.720
think it is, and sometimes it's not. One thing I

1399
01:22:04.760 --> 01:22:10.479
have learned is a woman's sixth sense hardly ever lies

1400
01:22:11.000 --> 01:22:16.079
it hardly ever, hold hold up, hold up, I said hardly.

1401
01:22:16.279 --> 01:22:17.159
I didn't say.

1402
01:22:18.760 --> 01:22:20.359
Wait, hold on real quick.

1403
01:22:21.000 --> 01:22:22.960
I also want to point out, you know, like, yes,

1404
01:22:23.000 --> 01:22:24.439
you know what I'm saying, your sixth sense all the

1405
01:22:24.479 --> 01:22:27.079
other lie but like like.

1406
01:22:27.079 --> 01:22:32.000
We get that gut feeling too, you know, Okay.

1407
01:22:31.319 --> 01:22:33.479
So it hardly it hardly ever.

1408
01:22:33.640 --> 01:22:35.520
Let me tell you something. Let me tell you something

1409
01:22:35.640 --> 01:22:39.600
I can't not that I can't stand it, but what

1410
01:22:39.760 --> 01:22:44.439
drives me up the fucking wall sometimes is when a

1411
01:22:44.520 --> 01:22:48.560
woman says a woman's intuition is never wrong.

1412
01:22:48.960 --> 01:22:51.159
Right, I didn't say that.

1413
01:22:51.600 --> 01:22:53.119
I didn't say I don't E didn't say that. But

1414
01:22:53.199 --> 01:22:55.399
sometimes it drives me up the wall when some women

1415
01:22:55.479 --> 01:22:59.840
sometimes say my woman's intuition is never wrong. Okay, all right.

1416
01:23:00.359 --> 01:23:01.399
So if you can.

1417
01:23:01.159 --> 01:23:05.680
Sense that your man is doing something wrong to you,

1418
01:23:06.479 --> 01:23:10.239
or has something scheming, or something's going on, then why

1419
01:23:10.279 --> 01:23:15.319
can't you sense when your man is hurting? I know,

1420
01:23:15.399 --> 01:23:17.680
but it keeps It drives me. It drives me up

1421
01:23:17.680 --> 01:23:19.239
the freaking wall when that shit happens.

1422
01:23:20.319 --> 01:23:23.319
People, we're not mind readers, but we are.

1423
01:23:23.399 --> 01:23:26.239
But you claim to be. You claim to have this

1424
01:23:26.239 --> 01:23:27.039
this sixth sense.

1425
01:23:27.520 --> 01:23:31.800
Yes, because a sixth sense, a sixth sense is based

1426
01:23:31.880 --> 01:23:34.680
on some type of red flag.

1427
01:23:34.920 --> 01:23:36.960
Then sense when you're a man is struggling.

1428
01:23:39.680 --> 01:23:42.039
If you don't tell me you're struggling, I don't know

1429
01:23:42.119 --> 01:23:45.079
that you're struggling, Especially when you ask the man all

1430
01:23:45.119 --> 01:23:48.600
the time, are you okay? Are you okay? Are you okay?

1431
01:23:48.760 --> 01:23:51.720
And their ego gets in the way and they're like, yeah,

1432
01:23:51.720 --> 01:23:53.800
I'm fine, Yeah, I'm fine, Yeah, I'm fine.

1433
01:23:54.239 --> 01:23:54.439
Yeah.

1434
01:23:54.479 --> 01:23:56.279
You know what, I gotta agree. I gotta agree on

1435
01:23:56.319 --> 01:23:59.600
that one because I used to do that recently until

1436
01:23:59.720 --> 01:24:03.720
you know, you know, like like you know what, And

1437
01:24:03.760 --> 01:24:06.119
I kind of still do that in a way, but

1438
01:24:06.520 --> 01:24:07.800
I have to take my time to like you know,

1439
01:24:07.920 --> 01:24:11.439
like like you know, like express it out. You understand

1440
01:24:11.479 --> 01:24:14.520
I'm saying because like sometimes like you know, like recently,

1441
01:24:14.560 --> 01:24:16.560
like yo, like I've been like lost words. I'm like, yo,

1442
01:24:16.600 --> 01:24:19.640
you know everything, you know, like everything's like I feel

1443
01:24:19.640 --> 01:24:22.640
like everything's collapsing around me and I'm lost to words.

1444
01:24:22.760 --> 01:24:24.760
You're not gonna let nobody know that?

1445
01:24:25.920 --> 01:24:27.760
No, Well, you know, I let my girl know that,

1446
01:24:28.479 --> 01:24:31.319
because you know what, that's good, she asked. She was like, yo,

1447
01:24:31.359 --> 01:24:33.479
you know what She's like. She's like, you know, like

1448
01:24:34.439 --> 01:24:36.079
I could tell, like you know, like you're looking at

1449
01:24:36.119 --> 01:24:38.560
me and you're looking past me. I'm like no, I

1450
01:24:39.560 --> 01:24:41.840
like you know, like she's like tone in your voice.

1451
01:24:41.880 --> 01:24:43.359
She's like, but I'm I'm gonna let you be.

1452
01:24:44.079 --> 01:24:47.640
Until you're ready, you know. So mm hmm.

1453
01:24:47.800 --> 01:24:50.039
You know, like you know, like I told her what

1454
01:24:50.079 --> 01:24:53.079
it was or whatever, and like, you know, like she

1455
01:24:53.199 --> 01:24:55.560
knows she knows what something's wrong, like the same way

1456
01:24:55.600 --> 01:24:59.000
I know what something's wrong with her. Yeah, you learn

1457
01:24:59.079 --> 01:25:01.720
each other, Yeah, you know, like like you know, like

1458
01:25:02.119 --> 01:25:06.800
body language, and you know, behavioral patterns, and.

1459
01:25:06.800 --> 01:25:09.520
Sometimes people gets hard at guessing. You know.

1460
01:25:10.680 --> 01:25:12.359
I'm like, yeah, you know what, you know what I

1461
01:25:12.359 --> 01:25:14.680
gotta tell us. Hey, when you when you're ready, just

1462
01:25:14.720 --> 01:25:17.439
say it, said no, because you're gonna get upset. I'm like,

1463
01:25:17.640 --> 01:25:19.359
I'm like, yoh, listen, I'm not even gonna get upset.

1464
01:25:19.359 --> 01:25:19.439
You know.

1465
01:25:19.439 --> 01:25:22.640
If it's something I'm doing, then say it, you know, like,

1466
01:25:22.800 --> 01:25:26.319
just say it. If I do get upset, so be it.

1467
01:25:26.359 --> 01:25:30.840
Say get it off your chest.

1468
01:25:29.279 --> 01:25:29.439
You know.

1469
01:25:30.119 --> 01:25:32.199
And sometimes you know, like the way she feels because

1470
01:25:32.239 --> 01:25:34.119
of me, you know what I'm saying, of what I'm

1471
01:25:34.199 --> 01:25:38.399
not doing, I'll get mad about it, right, and then

1472
01:25:38.439 --> 01:25:40.000
like you know, I'll tell her. I'm like, all right, yo,

1473
01:25:40.079 --> 01:25:42.920
you know what I'm you know what I'm saying. I'm

1474
01:25:42.920 --> 01:25:45.439
gonna try my hardest to like, you know, do more,

1475
01:25:47.119 --> 01:25:51.359
you know, like but then like you know, like if

1476
01:25:51.399 --> 01:25:54.239
it's something like physical, right, and she gets upset at

1477
01:25:54.239 --> 01:25:57.119
me for it, she's again she's like she's like, but

1478
01:25:57.119 --> 01:25:58.880
but sometimes I have to remember that, you know, you

1479
01:25:58.960 --> 01:26:04.359
have your days where like you're like fucked up, you know,

1480
01:26:05.159 --> 01:26:10.920
because like another thing too, is that I have I

1481
01:26:10.960 --> 01:26:12.239
really have my mornings when I.

1482
01:26:12.159 --> 01:26:13.760
Wake up, and I really can't, you know what I'm saying.

1483
01:26:13.760 --> 01:26:16.439
It's like it's mission impossible to get off the bed,

1484
01:26:16.479 --> 01:26:19.199
but i have to because of my daughter, you know.

1485
01:26:19.239 --> 01:26:23.000
And I'm in pain all day, Like I'm miserable, you know.

1486
01:26:23.640 --> 01:26:28.039
So it's like it's just it's just you know, but

1487
01:26:28.079 --> 01:26:31.399
like what she understands that part, you know, because of

1488
01:26:31.439 --> 01:26:34.760
what I'm going to you know, but like back to

1489
01:26:34.800 --> 01:26:37.840
this person right here, you know, like there's three flaps

1490
01:26:37.880 --> 01:26:41.760
as is, you know, like and if and if it's

1491
01:26:41.800 --> 01:26:47.800
her intuition that's kicking in, you know, then she already

1492
01:26:47.880 --> 01:26:54.479
knows the answer, right, you know, but to be clear,

1493
01:26:54.960 --> 01:26:57.239
way for everything to play out, you know, and we

1494
01:26:57.319 --> 01:27:01.000
starts projecting and whatever, you know, Like you gotta listen

1495
01:27:01.000 --> 01:27:02.439
to the tone of his voice, you know what I'm saying,

1496
01:27:02.439 --> 01:27:06.520
Like if he starts projecting like angrily out of nowhere about.

1497
01:27:06.239 --> 01:27:07.880
It, then you know it's true.

1498
01:27:09.399 --> 01:27:10.960
And I'm only saying and and and you know what,

1499
01:27:11.000 --> 01:27:13.279
it may sound like I'm snitching or whatever, but hey,

1500
01:27:13.319 --> 01:27:15.720
you know what I used to do. I used to

1501
01:27:15.720 --> 01:27:22.159
do that, you know, I used to project, Yes, back then,

1502
01:27:22.560 --> 01:27:26.000
I used to do that, you know, Am I projecting now? No,

1503
01:27:26.600 --> 01:27:27.920
you know, because I ain't bro.

1504
01:27:28.159 --> 01:27:30.479
I don't do nothing your bro.

1505
01:27:31.000 --> 01:27:34.159
Yeah, of course, you know, like like like like Collon

1506
01:27:34.279 --> 01:27:35.960
like Collon knows, you know, like I'll go pick them

1507
01:27:36.039 --> 01:27:40.800
up whatever, right, and then like you know, like we're

1508
01:27:40.840 --> 01:27:45.720
riding around or whatever, right, and like every like probably

1509
01:27:45.760 --> 01:27:47.560
like you know, like every like half an hour, I'm

1510
01:27:47.560 --> 01:27:49.640
calling my girl to see the baby's okay. See she's

1511
01:27:49.680 --> 01:27:54.680
all right, she needs anything since I'm outside, right, she says, no,

1512
01:27:54.760 --> 01:27:57.479
I'm like great, you know, And then on the way

1513
01:27:57.520 --> 01:27:59.319
back to get the phone call, can you go to Walmart?

1514
01:27:59.479 --> 01:28:04.199
Like I thought? I was all right anyways? You know, but.

1515
01:28:05.800 --> 01:28:08.920
It's basically, you know, like you learn, you know what

1516
01:28:08.920 --> 01:28:12.119
I'm saying, like learning who you're with, you know, like

1517
01:28:12.199 --> 01:28:14.119
you gotta learn who you with, you know, like like

1518
01:28:14.159 --> 01:28:15.880
you know, just don't be with them to be with them,

1519
01:28:15.920 --> 01:28:17.399
you know what I'm saying. Sex may be great, Hey,

1520
01:28:17.520 --> 01:28:19.920
that's good. You know, like, oh, they do this, and

1521
01:28:20.199 --> 01:28:23.119
you know they have a you know, jealousy problem. You know,

1522
01:28:23.199 --> 01:28:27.119
like like oh, Lady G said sometimes you know, jealous

1523
01:28:27.439 --> 01:28:30.079
Like you know what when this person said jealousy problem,

1524
01:28:30.159 --> 01:28:32.960
I stought to myself, Yeah, you know what, you know,

1525
01:28:33.039 --> 01:28:34.800
what like for for those who be jealous. You know

1526
01:28:34.800 --> 01:28:37.239
what I'm saying, Like, it's kind of a rough flag

1527
01:28:37.279 --> 01:28:39.239
for me personally, because you know what.

1528
01:28:41.399 --> 01:28:42.000
That means.

1529
01:28:42.840 --> 01:28:48.720
You're either hiding something, right, because that's what because that's

1530
01:28:48.720 --> 01:28:50.960
what it is. I'm saying, you either hiding something or

1531
01:28:51.039 --> 01:28:53.880
that person doesn't have the self esteem that he thinks

1532
01:28:53.880 --> 01:28:54.279
he has.

1533
01:28:54.760 --> 01:28:56.439
Wait, man, what do you mean hiding something?

1534
01:28:56.479 --> 01:28:56.680
Though?

1535
01:28:58.880 --> 01:29:04.399
When people get defense says about things, it's because they

1536
01:29:04.439 --> 01:29:06.840
have something that they're hiding or that they too.

1537
01:29:06.960 --> 01:29:09.800
No, but he's but he said he said about the jealousy,

1538
01:29:10.199 --> 01:29:12.399
about the jealousy, he's hiding something.

1539
01:29:12.920 --> 01:29:15.840
Yeah, you want to know why because he probably got

1540
01:29:15.880 --> 01:29:18.199
away with things before and.

1541
01:29:19.920 --> 01:29:22.079
He's projecting you see what I'm saying, that's the reason

1542
01:29:22.119 --> 01:29:23.039
why he's jealous.

1543
01:29:23.880 --> 01:29:25.840
Like example, if he got away with something and you know,

1544
01:29:25.920 --> 01:29:27.439
and and let's just say some of the dudes like

1545
01:29:27.479 --> 01:29:29.640
you know, you know, like just like you know, like

1546
01:29:29.640 --> 01:29:31.600
their friends or whatever, he's gonna you know what I'm saying,

1547
01:29:31.600 --> 01:29:33.840
be jealous about it because he's gonna be thinking you know,

1548
01:29:35.439 --> 01:29:37.560
like yo, you know what I need her from? You

1549
01:29:37.560 --> 01:29:39.159
know what I'm saying. For me, that's it, you know,

1550
01:29:39.640 --> 01:29:41.560
Like I don't want that karma coming back to me.

1551
01:29:42.359 --> 01:29:44.840
You see what the jealousy kicks in, you know what

1552
01:29:44.840 --> 01:29:47.479
I'm saying, because of his conscience, his conscious is not cleaning,

1553
01:29:48.560 --> 01:29:49.560
so his jealousy will.

1554
01:29:49.479 --> 01:29:55.159
Kicking right, okay, all right, and.

1555
01:29:55.119 --> 01:29:58.520
I'm speaking I'm speaking that from experience right right right,

1556
01:29:59.159 --> 01:30:03.680
you know, okay, because you know what I've done. I've

1557
01:30:03.680 --> 01:30:07.279
done foul things like that, you know, and I'm not

1558
01:30:07.359 --> 01:30:07.800
proud of.

1559
01:30:07.760 --> 01:30:11.800
It, but I've done it right Okay.

1560
01:30:11.560 --> 01:30:14.840
You know I don't do it no more by the way,

1561
01:30:15.600 --> 01:30:17.600
you know, because like because like yo, you know what

1562
01:30:18.920 --> 01:30:19.439
first things?

1563
01:30:19.439 --> 01:30:20.520
First is what my heart is.

1564
01:30:20.560 --> 01:30:23.039
A Secondly, I'm too old for that, like living double

1565
01:30:23.119 --> 01:30:25.600
Like who that's time for that? Especially in social media,

1566
01:30:25.640 --> 01:30:29.079
you get caught quick, you know, Like social media made

1567
01:30:29.079 --> 01:30:32.359
it easy to see, it made it easier to get caught.

1568
01:30:32.800 --> 01:30:36.479
String shots exist.

1569
01:30:35.439 --> 01:30:40.479
Nah man, Nah, you know, like there's way I got

1570
01:30:40.479 --> 01:30:41.920
way too much you know what I'm saying, too much

1571
01:30:41.960 --> 01:30:43.000
good on my plate.

1572
01:30:43.119 --> 01:30:45.680
For me to just throw it in the garbage right right.

1573
01:30:45.920 --> 01:30:47.720
Like like yo, you know what, I got lobster and

1574
01:30:47.720 --> 01:30:50.319
shrimp on my plate. Why would I want to go

1575
01:30:50.319 --> 01:30:51.079
get a happy meal?

1576
01:30:53.960 --> 01:30:56.000
Lobster and shrimp. I'm alergic to shellfish.

1577
01:30:56.039 --> 01:30:59.399
Bro, just say yeah, bad, my bad. You know what?

1578
01:30:59.479 --> 01:31:03.319
All right? You know but I got steaking ribs.

1579
01:31:03.479 --> 01:31:04.560
Now we're talking.

1580
01:31:06.319 --> 01:31:07.920
Mill maybe yeah yeah.

1581
01:31:07.800 --> 01:31:10.760
Yeah, right, So why would I want to go get

1582
01:31:10.800 --> 01:31:15.399
You know what I'm saying, A biggie bad for Monday's

1583
01:31:16.000 --> 01:31:16.840
You know what I'm saying.

1584
01:31:16.600 --> 01:31:20.239
Like not for but those biggie bags be slamming bro.

1585
01:31:20.880 --> 01:31:23.239
Yeah, but yo, you know what away from them?

1586
01:31:25.439 --> 01:31:27.520
You know what, You're right, you're right, but like what's

1587
01:31:27.560 --> 01:31:29.520
more for feeling? You know what I'm saying This the

1588
01:31:29.600 --> 01:31:31.159
steak in the ribs.

1589
01:31:31.560 --> 01:31:34.359
Or making the ribs? Bro, steaking the ribs man?

1590
01:31:36.119 --> 01:31:36.640
You know? So?

1591
01:31:37.359 --> 01:31:40.159
But but this, you know what I'm saying This this

1592
01:31:40.520 --> 01:31:41.439
woman right here, you know.

1593
01:31:41.560 --> 01:31:43.960
I think I think she needs to sit back and

1594
01:31:44.039 --> 01:31:47.279
let it play out. I would let it play out

1595
01:31:47.319 --> 01:31:53.479
because I would need more information than just somebody like

1596
01:31:53.680 --> 01:31:55.800
you know what I'm saying, like, let's see what happens

1597
01:31:55.840 --> 01:31:57.760
the next time he goes out. You know what I'm saying,

1598
01:31:57.800 --> 01:32:00.560
I see if because if it happen is the next

1599
01:32:00.560 --> 01:32:04.680
time he goes out, is somebody close to him, bron,

1600
01:32:04.720 --> 01:32:06.399
then then you gotta look at and then you gotta

1601
01:32:06.399 --> 01:32:09.520
look at it surrounding surrounding who he keeps it in

1602
01:32:09.800 --> 01:32:12.840
his pocket, you know what I'm saying, like his boys, like.

1603
01:32:13.640 --> 01:32:18.239
Or or you know what, or it's probably someone that

1604
01:32:18.359 --> 01:32:24.279
she knows that saw him. Yeah, tell him, but doesn't

1605
01:32:24.319 --> 01:32:27.279
know how to tell her because she is someone loved

1606
01:32:27.840 --> 01:32:31.039
and if she says something, she's gonna feel like, you know,

1607
01:32:31.279 --> 01:32:33.640
like she's being in the wedge within the relationship all

1608
01:32:33.680 --> 01:32:35.520
of a sudden, and they're going to have a fallen

1609
01:32:35.560 --> 01:32:38.840
out because you know, like like you know what, lady, happens.

1610
01:32:39.560 --> 01:32:41.119
That happens, no offense.

1611
01:32:41.159 --> 01:32:43.159
But like when women are in love, like really in

1612
01:32:43.199 --> 01:32:44.439
love with their man, you know what I'm saying, they

1613
01:32:44.520 --> 01:32:47.239
believe anything and everything he says, like like you know,

1614
01:32:47.840 --> 01:32:51.520
and they will defend that, you know, like like I've

1615
01:32:51.560 --> 01:32:51.960
seen it.

1616
01:32:52.880 --> 01:32:53.479
I've seen it.

1617
01:32:54.600 --> 01:32:57.039
So it's like they're gonna defend, you know what I'm saying, defended, like,

1618
01:32:57.119 --> 01:32:58.920
you know, to the ends of the earth.

1619
01:32:58.960 --> 01:33:02.119
Like this dude could be like, Yo, the sky is

1620
01:33:02.479 --> 01:33:03.520
a purple hue.

1621
01:33:03.359 --> 01:33:07.000
And she was like, yes it is, baby, No, damn well,

1622
01:33:07.039 --> 01:33:10.520
there's no purple hues in the sky. So it's like

1623
01:33:11.840 --> 01:33:15.000
that's the reason that's probably the reason why the the

1624
01:33:15.119 --> 01:33:17.720
post the message came anonymously.

1625
01:33:17.720 --> 01:33:19.439
Right, you know.

1626
01:33:19.680 --> 01:33:22.880
Right, So it's like so so either which way, you know,

1627
01:33:23.039 --> 01:33:28.920
like she got a warning shot, right, either which way,

1628
01:33:28.960 --> 01:33:32.039
she got a warning shot, So you know she better

1629
01:33:32.079 --> 01:33:33.439
be on the p's and q's.

1630
01:33:34.319 --> 01:33:41.600
Yeah, well there it goes. That's what it is. With

1631
01:33:41.640 --> 01:33:47.359
that being said. Yeah, man, yeah, it's crazy.

1632
01:33:48.159 --> 01:33:51.640
By the way, how's everybody summer so far? Some's coming

1633
01:33:51.640 --> 01:33:52.000
to an.

1634
01:33:52.600 --> 01:33:54.319
I'm glad it's coming to it, and I can't wait

1635
01:33:54.319 --> 01:33:56.039
for next week football season.

1636
01:33:56.880 --> 01:34:01.239
It's next week already, Yeah.

1637
01:34:00.800 --> 01:34:03.600
Amanda says, But how is she gonna trust him the

1638
01:34:03.600 --> 01:34:05.479
next time he goes out with his colleagues?

1639
01:34:07.680 --> 01:34:10.079
Well, you know what, wait real quick.

1640
01:34:10.159 --> 01:34:12.840
I mean again, I'm not putting women down or nothing,

1641
01:34:13.159 --> 01:34:15.680
but women are great actors, actresses.

1642
01:34:16.159 --> 01:34:17.239
They could play it off, you know.

1643
01:34:17.279 --> 01:34:20.439
Like like you know, like like always like like for instance, right,

1644
01:34:21.359 --> 01:34:24.079
all she has to do is stroke his ego, right,

1645
01:34:25.119 --> 01:34:27.119
and he will leave like there's nothing wrong. That So

1646
01:34:27.199 --> 01:34:28.760
you have to do is stroke, just stroke to do

1647
01:34:28.800 --> 01:34:31.600
his ego. He will leave like there's nothing wrong or whatever.

1648
01:34:32.039 --> 01:34:33.760
But yeah, you know what, just keep you know what

1649
01:34:33.760 --> 01:34:34.800
I'm saying, keep an eye on it.

1650
01:34:35.520 --> 01:34:37.439
You know what I'm saying. She has to yo, you

1651
01:34:37.439 --> 01:34:38.359
know what, she has to play the.

1652
01:34:38.319 --> 01:34:42.279
Part, you know, right, Yo, you know what if you yo,

1653
01:34:42.560 --> 01:34:43.920
if you gotta catch you know what I'm saying, to

1654
01:34:43.920 --> 01:34:47.960
catch a wolf, you gotta be a wolf, you know,

1655
01:34:48.079 --> 01:34:49.720
like you gotta pay yo.

1656
01:34:49.760 --> 01:34:50.039
You know what.

1657
01:34:50.079 --> 01:34:53.800
Sometimes you gotta play the part. Yeah, as much as

1658
01:34:53.840 --> 01:34:55.279
it bothers you. But you know what, if you want

1659
01:34:55.279 --> 01:34:57.560
the truth, you gotta play the part. You gotta act.

1660
01:34:59.840 --> 01:35:09.000
H Yep, yep. Absolutely well. With that being said. Once again,

1661
01:35:10.000 --> 01:35:14.239
with that being said, we're gonna close it out. I

1662
01:35:14.279 --> 01:35:17.439
want to thank all the fans of the show. Go

1663
01:35:17.520 --> 01:35:20.279
over to the to the fan page on Facebook. Man vote,

1664
01:35:20.319 --> 01:35:22.760
do what you gotta do to get that get those prizes.

1665
01:35:23.640 --> 01:35:27.760
You know what I'm saying. Thanks for coming by for

1666
01:35:27.800 --> 01:35:30.119
the night, hanging out with us for a little while.

1667
01:35:30.359 --> 01:35:33.279
You know how we do it here. You know, that's

1668
01:35:33.600 --> 01:35:38.640
dubs of Don Simon Phoenix. That's Lady g the glorious doctor.

1669
01:35:40.359 --> 01:35:56.920
Doctor, doctor Doctor, I'm oh man, doctor Hank smash him

1670
01:35:57.399 --> 01:35:58.279
at your service.

1671
01:35:59.279 --> 01:36:02.319
It's been another episode. This has been another episode of

1672
01:36:02.359 --> 01:36:07.399
This Might Her podcast, and Amanda says, you guys, have

1673
01:36:07.479 --> 01:36:09.359
a good night. Thank you Amanda, you.

1674
01:36:11.239 --> 01:36:12.439
Know you have a good night as well.

1675
01:36:13.399 --> 01:36:16.000
So with that being said, once again, I'm big holy On.

1676
01:36:16.199 --> 01:36:20.000
That's Lady G that's Simon Phoenix loves a down. And

1677
01:36:20.079 --> 01:36:22.840
you know how we do every single week. We're gonna

1678
01:36:22.880 --> 01:36:24.840
start doing it every single week. We're try and start

1679
01:36:24.840 --> 01:36:25.880
doing it every single.

1680
01:36:25.600 --> 01:36:27.960
Week until we fall off again.

1681
01:36:27.720 --> 01:36:30.560
Until we fall off again. Yeah, and then you know,

1682
01:36:31.439 --> 01:36:37.800
but anyway, I always remember that at some point this

1683
01:36:37.880 --> 01:36:45.960
might hurt. See, good night, everybody, good night, all right,

1684
01:36:46.000 --> 01:36:47.720
good night everybody. Night.