Platinum Plus Wednesday!! (Recorded LIVE On 9-17-25)

0:16 Mhm yo.

1:44 Exce up everybody, this is big holding on all this might heard podcast coming to you live from you know how you know where were coming live from. I don't have to tell you because you're ready. No what I'm saying. So with that being said, welcome to the show. Tonight's show Platinum Plus Wednesday. It's also suicide Prevention Month. We'll get into that. We'll get into a bunch of other shit. You know how it is. They ain't bringing my co host, my lovely co host, my dog thought I lady G how you doing?

2:27 I cannot hear you. You can't hear me. I can I hear you? No? No, my mic is working. Oh I'm not connected to nothing else. You don't hear me at all. Yeah, you don't hear me. I can't hear you, sir. Oh no, hold on, you talk. Can anybody out there hear me? Or is it me? Or is it her?

3:09 Can anybody confirm? Nor den? I if they can hear us, I don't know. I don't know what's wrong. We would just hold on? Oh, she says, she hears us both. Well, I hear you now? Oh all right, well, thank you. I appreciate that. Melissa thank you very much for the sound check. Appreciate it. Okay, I don't know what happened that was. That was weird. But I hear you, now, all right.

3:52 That's all that matters. We hear each other. So you didn't hear you, didn't hear me? Give me your grand entrance? No, I was just seeing you on the. Screen, I said, I said, I said, the lovely doc thought I lady g. What's up people in podcast land? Yeah? Yeah, So with with this month being suice type avention month, I am right right, yeah, that's right. Say hello to my little friend. Am almost cold handle? Look gonna take it easy? Hello, Yes, yeah, So you know, there's a lot of a lot, a lot of stuff that we're gonna go over the day I got I got some questions that I wrote down that I want to ask you co hosts and the fans of the show.

4:59 Hopefully they can give us some insight into who they are, who's listening, you know, and and we'll give you know what it is, you know, give our thoughts on all right, Puerto Rico, Puerto Rico. Yeah, so you know, considering I'm not from Puerto Rico, no, oh. Boo, No, I'm playing. I'm playing, Yeah, I'm playing anyway. Yeah, so we have we have a mixture of of of Latin Latin descendants here, I mean because I mean I'm from Puerto Rican. You are Peruvian, dubs is Nicoaguan, Jamaican and Puerto Rican and I think.

5:57 T is I don't know what. I want to say, Puerto Rican too, but I'm not I'm not quite sure. I'm not quite sure. We'll have to if you have to ask him when she comes on? What comes on? So anyway, how have you been? Wonderful? As usual? Every day I wake up on this side of the ground, I am awesome day. That's always. That's always a great way to be either way. When you when you wake up in the morning, you look up and you're still here, and it's like, yes, another day, another day. I've lived another day. So it's great.

6:40 It's it's great to be alive. Man, it's great to be to be here with you. II. How you doing. I'm talking to you. You know, I'm talking to you. You know I have my health. Uh, my children. Just got to speak to my granddaughter for her third birthday. Oh that's that's great, that's awesome. Yeah, that's wonderful. Grandkids are a blessing. They are because you can give them back at the end. Of the day. Mine's too far away. But I'm still single, So you know there's that.

7:24 Because your season is coming, isn't it winter? It is, it is. I'm not worried sweater weather. No, my sweater weather whenever God deems it necessary. I'm enjoying. Hey, I'm enjoying my solitude. Yeah, you gotta, you gotta have solitude, right, yeah, my my, my living room, my living room is my fortress of solitude. You know what's crazy, You know it's wild. If I feel some kind of way, I can spend the whole day and not come into the living room once. Really, Yeah, I'll sit in my room. I'll do that. With all those screens you got going on.

8:04 I just I don't like if I feel like like down, if I feel like I'm stressing, or you know, I feel any kind of way, I won't bring it into my living room. My living room is my safe space. Wow. Yeah, I'll hang on in my bedroom. I'll pace in the kitchen, I'll walk into the bathroom forty fifty times, hang out outside of the living room. Yeah, I won't come in here if I'm feeling some kind of way. Straight up, I'm not bringing nothing into my living room. My living room is my theater. I guess that would be my bedroom. Yeah, well, everybody has a space, you know what I mean? Yeah, definitely, Yeah. Of course. So as we wait for the other hosts, the rest of our crew, the rest of the crew. Yeah, I'm hoping to form Voltron tonight, but we'll see what happens.

9:00 We're one short of that. Yeah, yeah, you're right, But I have an email. We'll talk about this while we wait for the others. So here goes you and your emails. Yeah, I can't help the fact that they keep sending them in. I gotta I gotta talk about them. I can't just let them send them in and not discuss them. I don't get no emails. I mean, I, oh, look who's here, the lovely, the lovely TG love All.

9:41 I don't hear anything. Oh no, you don't at all. All right, let me get out, all right, all. Right, she'll have to come back. I'm not going to give her a grand entrance again. She messed it up the first time, all right, Okay, so let's see if she comes back in so we can do this with her here. Yeah, so we got one two day five Okay, how about now?

10:29 I think my volume was down. This is the kind of week I'm having. So there you go. So before we get into this this email, I want to ask you how you've been. It's been a while. It has been a while. I got a lot going on on my aunts and I did go to I served. I went to jury duty today. Nice. Uh. I was juror number four, but I was not selected for the trial. I didn't make it. That's okay. Did you tell them whatever he did? He did it?

11:10 No, No, But they do ask like specific questions, and like I knew once I stood up for one of the questions that they asked that it was going to be like a bias issue for them. Yeah. Right, So it's all good. Though. It was fun like to like see how how they do it, like how it's done, sort of like in that scenario justice, you know, turn, Like how they pictures, like the questions that they ask. It's interesting. So we had a debate. What is your nationality for Hispanic heritage month.

11:54 I'm Keevian Puerto Rican. Ah, all right, she said, she said, Puerto Rican. I said like, you were like, did I say anything? I said, I said, I said, I don't know. I know she said this Puerto Rican somewhere, and I was saying, I was saying, I. Was, I. Have her friend who calls me that to annoy me because he's like Mexican. You know, you're all the same. And I was like, no, we're not. Don't you dare We're not going there. Yeah, that's wild. All right, So you've been good. Everything good, everything's all right. No, but you know where, but yeah.

12:36 You're alive, you know, I know that's good. How's a kiddie doing? Can He's good. I have the other one here still and they're getting along. Now you another one. Well, yeah, I have my friend's kat too. Mm hmm. It's but he's like nine months now, so he's he's a boy, okay, and they are. They have their moments. But my cat lost weight because she was She's actually like getting up and playing instead of just laying on the couch all day every day. So it's a good thing for her. She needed it.

13:19 Play play friends like a lazy kitty, you know what I mean. That's how they get all chunky and. What you gotta laugh for see, when you laugh. When you laugh, it makes. It, it makes it like got to that's crazy. And then it's like lazy kitty, my god. See, oh my goodness, Wow, that's what they call menopause. That's hilarious. Oh man, yeah something. But yeah, it's uh, I don't know, it's just been it's been crazy. It's hard when you already deal and stuffar with depression and stuff like that to really like get up every day and not feel like like.

14:13 I don't want to get out of bed. That's that's the reality every day. Like sometimes I put the news on because I'm hopeful, like you know, like I like hearing, you know, when there's cures for cancer or something. There's been some things coming out and that makes me hopeful. But the minute that they go into the polities of things and stuff, I like, I got to shut it off because I'm just like I can't. And the climate right now between people is insane, right, let's just put it that way. And the only fear I have right now is that racists are feeling very emboldened. And I don't appreciate that because there's no room in here for racism. Like it's twenty twenty five, Like, what the fuck are we still doing?

15:06 I don't get any of it right, Yeah, I might. I might have to beat a cat in a minute. If he doesn't, you're gonna beat the kiddy. Yeah, I'm a beat. I would never what are you doing? More like I yell at him and then he doesn't even care. He just lays on the grounds and he's just like, oh, like, that's not helping me. It wor this might be this might be a little bit he has to do with a pet. I don't know why we got an email about a pet, but anyway, well. You know what, it's an email? Yeah, all right, here we go. I have a dog that's on the older side at nine years old. A few weeks ago, it lost the use of its back legs.

15:54 I had to get surgery for him because I was not getting him put down. All in all, it came out to eighty five hundred dollars goddamn, all of which I had to pay out a pocket for. Of course, this wasn't a huge problem because I have plenty saved up and in general I'm well off. Here's the issue. I know, right whose season is is? I wish that was my problem? Buddy. All right, here's the issue. My girlfriend's sister has been struggling with rent. Apparently she's behind a few months and panicking about being kicked out. When my girlfriend found out what I paid for the surgery, she got really upset with me and said I was selfish. Her words were along the lines of you spend eight grand on a dog, but you won't even help my sister keep the roof over her head. Since my girlfriend has been pissed off with me and keeps calling me cheap and selfish for not helping her sister, I feel like, hold on, let me finish. Hold up, Hold up, hold up. I feel like I shouldn't have to suffer for another person's poor life choices. The reason her, Yeah, the reason her sister is in this predicament is because her relationship fell apart

17:29 and she's living in a place she can't afford. Further further to that, I own a four bedroom house and my girlfriend suggested her sister come move with us, but I refused. I don't want my girlfriend to be mad at me, and I want to make it up, but I also don't want to give into her demands. What can I do to repair this leave. First of all, she call you selfish and all this stuff for taking care of your fucking dog. Are you kidding me? That's not the only thing. First of all, as a girlfriend that does not give you wife benefits like thank you, you are not legally bound to this woman, nor are you legally bound to her family. And adults make their own decisions exactly.

18:20 She's the woman responsible. Yes, we are not responsible for the choices of other people, especially if we're not married. To our girlfriend. I need that boyfriend's fuck it up because. Let and pay. He could pay for the kiddy to get things done. That's great. Shame her for that expectation. Yeah, keep the dog exactly, save that dog, help her sister. Right they were married, Right, If they were married, this would be a different story. But they're not married. This is your girlfriend, and your girlfriend has these expectations. By girl, she obviously know he has money, and she's hitting at the fact that because he has money, he should be helping her and our family out. Like no, girl, No, that's not how this worked. See, these are the women that give women a bad name because they make it seem like we're all like money hungry and shit or like using people and like men for certain things, like of what they can provide, and that's not the case.

19:37 I can't read anything, by the way, I have very bad visions, so you're gonna have to read stuff. It's a real pooch. I'll miss you. Oh wow. Listen though, if you have the money, you're gonna do what you can for your dog. Like I had someone get mad at me when I because my hat I think it was last year, started throwing up and stuff and she was acting really weird. So I figured, Okay, she ate something she shouldn't have eaten, so I got scared. I took her to the vet. Yes, I hardly had any money. It took my last dime. But I don't want to tag cat. I want my cat.

20:19 So she's my companion, my baby, my boo. Like I'm not you know, people's pets are their family, Like I don't think it's fair. Like yeah, people who who are like it's just a dog, Well you ain't got you haven't had that love from that dog. That's unconditional right there. Like could you imagine, ba, see if someone told you not to like help your baby out, like your puppy, Like I would be like, uh, no, let's do a GoFundMe right now, because we're gonna help this baby, right. Like Melissa just said, why don't she give her sister the money? Speaking selfish, you know what I mean?

21:03 Yeah? No, I mean we've established the fact that the girlfriend's got to go and that she's she has the wrong expectations here, and you know, oh my god, I can't believe that she wanted her fucking sister to move in with them. Oh lord Jesus. Check this out. Jessica says, I have a fourteen year old dog now he's living just to spite me. Basically, Oh wow, yeah. But that's wild, though. How do you? How do you do that? Man? How do you? How do you expect you? And and there's not even a ring on a finger? He says nothing about the girlfriend? Yes, girlfriend, girlfriend, So she's the girlfriend.

21:45 That means she can be the ex girlfriend. Yes she can. And you could slide right into. His d m off, slide right in the es. I love your dog. Shit all right, So I have before I get into the second email, which we'll do a little later, I have some questions here that I thought about and rolled up. Okay, and we're gonna I'm gonna pose this to my co host and to the fans who are active tonight. So the first one is, what's the biggest red flag that you've ignored in the relationship only for it to blow up later.

22:32 That they're not real? I think that that is a red flag. That is a red flag. Oh gosh, love bombing. Love bombing, all right, but love bombing like you think a red flag is. Yes, if I'm just talking to somebody days in and they're telling me that they're falling in love with me and love me and stuff like that, uh yeah, no, so that's not happening. Not having a good relationship, if they're a parent, not having a good relationship with the baby mom.

23:16 If that is the case, So wait a minute. So if if your dude doesn't have a good relationship with his baby mama, as a red flag. Is the first I mean, I need more details, right, but I'm only hearing one side of a story, so I have to take that into consideration. And I think a lot of us don't do that. We'll take someone's word, but I like receipts. So when someone starts showing me messages and what they're going through, then I have a more understanding, and then I can understand why the relationship it's different. Like in one instance, I know someone I knew from the get that there this was a situation.

23:59 So yes, in my mind, it was like, Okay, this is kind of a red flag because this is always going. To be a situation. This is not something that's gonna. Like just get better overnight, you know, especially in a co parenting situation. Right, Sometimes a red flag could be too many kids with too many women. M m, yeah, that that's a that's a problem, Melissa said, calling their ex psycho. Yeah, like that's what I mean too, Like it really depends how bad, Like are they bad mouthing them? What are they saying about them? If they talk about them too much, that's a that's a red flag.

24:48 Let's see. So am I red flag if I have three baby mamas? Oh h, I mean it definitely is something that like is like, okay, let me take a step back here, right, because you have a past we all have passed, which is fine, but I think it also matters the. Relationships and stuff like that. Like the relationships you have with your your kids is very different than a lot of people that I know, right, and you're very close to them, so like you're not an absent father or dead beat by any means. So I think that's not a red flag, right, But to some women it might be like a turn off in the beginning to hear that, right, But I think at the same time, we have to remember like how old we are and that we have passed that it's been like we're not young anymore. Right, this is a growth shit where most of us are divorced or had kids already, you know, are having grandchildren some people the older ones, and like that's what it is.

26:13 But I mean, I've said it people our age, our age group, we come with baggage. It's not like our life is starting once we get together. I had a whole life life since before you. Somebody grew up during the Internet, Okay, Like so I feel like that is pretty huge. We grew up through the beginning of that and look where it is now, right, Like, if it if it was now what like then was like now, we'd be fucked. We'd all would have had bad videos out there or.

27:03 Study exactly. So, yeah, we had social media back in our day. No, it was bad enough that we had AOL. And could talk to people, okay, and we were talking to freaking strangers. I've been talking to like a fifty year old man for all I know. You know what I'm saying, Like there was it was actually dangerous, but we didn't realize how dangerous it was. And I think now you can see the dangers more than you could before. But the danger has always been there. This is nothing new, right. Yeah, I completely I completely get it. I completely get it.

27:44 You know, it's it's it's it's wild. Yahoo chat rooms. Oh my god, that's what I'm saying. Those were bad, and then you meet people you start talking to him off the side. Mm hmm. Things went ugly in some places. Na, it was nuts and I was. Young and Yahoo black planet ay, well yeah, and I was doing. I don't even know what that is black planet. Black planet is before my Space.

28:25 Oh see, I never really got into my space. I only got into Facebook like in the late two thousands. When remember when everybody put down as l H sex location. Oh my lord, so red flags. Red flags with other red flags. Honestly, if you're mean to your animals, that's a big red flag. To me. A red flag is if everything I say is a problem for you. Mm hmm, yeah, I can see that being a red flag.

29:09 No matter what I say, you have something to Yeah, what's for telling me that I shouldn't feel a certain way, like my feelings are balanced? What would be your red flag? Like relationship for you? So for a woman, if you're dating a new woman, what would be the red flags for you. On the phone, Like. If I'm dating a woman? No dogs, he asked, like red flags meaning what? And I'm saying, like, if you're dating someone him, it would. Be a woman, so real quick, so real quick, Jessica says.

29:49 Protective turned possessive. Mm very controlling if you only hit me up a certain time of. Day mmmmm yeah yeah, or like you are talking back and forth, back and forth. And then you just automatically stop. Right, Oh it takes forever to answer back, right, But then if you do it to them, they get really pissed off. And it's not even our purpose. It's like, oh, I was busy or whatever it happens, right, we have to remember that people get busy. You can't take shit so personally, I learned that that's hard to do with texting, But because it's so easy, just read your own tone in there the way you want with words, So it's dangerous. So I learned not to take shit personally, so I wouldn't hear. But when you really like somebody and you want to hear from them and you he really.

30:42 Like that motherfucker? What the fuck? What did he do with? Is he fucking somebody else? Because it's bullshit? Another flying. That's great. Good when when you when you're like the side dude, and you know it, and she goes and she wants to break up with the what what you know, her main just to be with you. Yeah, that was a flag going in. Yeah, it was a big red flag going of course, of course you know what I'm saying, like you know what I mean like that, of course, I mean like that was a flat from I just wanted to the same point, you know, point it out.

31:29 Yes, like the husbands who will will say they'll leave their wives for their mistresses. Or the wife or the wife actually making a phone call talking about you. Know, please if he's even separated it now, I. Don't want to do this more. Another red flag. She jumps in the rivers for you when you didn't ask her. To separated, divorced less than a year. It sounds it sounds like somebody jumped in the road for you, bro, what happened? You know what I'm doing about the way? The way? The way you said that, this is like what a no one jumping.

32:10 The ref for me. But I've seen I've seen some ship like that too. Yeah, I've seen some ship like that. I was like, I was like, yo, yeah, man, you know what I'm saying, Like, next thing, you know. Man, look at this one. We're not together, but we live together. Oh damn no, don't do that to yourself. The worst. That is the worst. We're not together, but we live together. Yeah, that's not that because that's not three or four red flags in one. Yeah, that's wow. That's wow. Yeah, another another relationship with like but remember the question was the red flags you ignored later and they later on blew up the relationship was naive?

33:10 Yeah, like that he was shy and you know, played the nice boy that he didn't that he was not experienced in life, that he was you know, kind of naive and green. Mm hmm, all. Right, the reflect I ignored. The mama's boy, That's what I ignored. When they're too quiet, so like they don't share anything. To the first of all, So that's older than me, you know, Like I just I was just like in my thirties and I was like whatever, and like she had like nine years over me, right, and she.

34:09 Was like, you know, married, getting a divorce to do the separation at the time, right, So that was one red flag, right how like you know, I just jumped in so quick, right, and I got and I ain't gonna lie, you know what, I suck it in because you know, it was something different. So there was a period of time when I can't call it certain times or whatever not because she was working, because her acts at the house, seeing her you know, her child, because they had a child together, and I felt, you know what I'm saying, I found that strange and ship, you. Know, strange that that's a problem. Exactly, you know what I'm saying.

34:49 Like, but I ignored that, you know, and then like you know, everything like you know smoothed out on whatever, right, and you know, come and think of it, you know, like I always got called narcissistic, right, but she was just as bad, if not worse, because you know what. They called you out. You just said, you're like if she was not as she was just as bad, if not worse. So you are your meanting that you weren't. I mean I was. I was, was. Was because and the reason why, you know, I said it was because like looking back at my actions, I'm like, holy shit, I was narcissistic.

35:32 But like still though, right, let's just say, you know, how you get them is how they leave you. Yeah, and that's what happened, you know, so you know five years down the road, that's what happened. And I was, you know what, And I looked at it, I was like, yo, you know what, that's got to be karmic energy for all the foul have done. It has to, right. That is that's definitely a rare flame. Bro. I mean, I don't I understand, I don't understands. Hold it real quick before I get into that. Jessica says, I don't usually ignore them, lol, probably why I'm eternally single. Yeah, yeah, that. So. The thing The thing about it is this, I feel if you meet a woman, right and you say to her, oh, so you know how you're doing, how you've been, what's up this? And that? Are you involved? Yeah?

36:26 I'm married? All right, deuces, see you later, that should be the end of the conversation. Yeah, anybody who engages with someone who's involved, you don't know what you're getting yourself into, not at all. You know what I'm saying. You don't know what this dude is all about. This dude could be the wireless, he could be jealous, he could be possessive, obsessive, whatever the fuck. You may be due family. Yeah, you know what I'm saying, Like, you don't know what the fuck you're doing. You don't know what you're getting yourself into. That's why you don't ever get involved with anybody who's involved. You know what. You can't You can't ruin something that's already ruined, you know what I'm saying. Nah, but still throwing a wrench into that better.

37:10 You're you're making a choice, though conscious deliberate the. Choice something you know is not right and it's just not. Going to But but but you know what, like like I'm going back to like you know, like you know, like like my situation is like like it was told you know, it was told to me what it was, you know, like you know, like they're you know, like they're in the middle of separation, getting the divorce and stuff right, so the guy, I bet you know, I didn't think nothing of it. Come to find out that, you know, they were just they were just separating. Like that's why you asked you to turn thrown and walked away as soon as she said, with separating, getting a divorce.

37:50 And I want to see us right right, I want. To set that ship. See I'm better not be living in the same house either. You want me be an ignorant though, Like I was like, yo, you know what, you know what I like the child, You know what I'm saying, because there's. A thrill to it. Of course, of course is the thrill. Yeah, you know, like the the whole like you can get caught and it's bad and it's I get it, but it's just it's not good. It was like the came back to me. So Jessica said, it's always a pivotal moment to choose to stay and ride it out, ride the red flag out, or just even.

38:36 Be Yeah, but I don't think they should be ignored. And we really didn't answer the question because I didn't really think about red flags. I ignored it. I did name a couple of that, but uh, I think that like it happens and and the the truth of the matter is that we do not trust our gut when we should. And and that what it really comes down to it because if there's even a fucking inkling that it feels wrong or just something is wrong, one. D fifty, it's wrong, there's something wrong. What does that say? I can't ry? Melissa says, I was dating man for months and he did everything for me. Then six months and he told me about his wife, and that's that's when I dropped him right there.

39:26 I mean, yeah, I mean, he freaking lied to you from the gut goddamn's expensing. And then you know, it's crazy you don't know what you shared with someone six months in for them to turn around and say, well, I got. A wife, right right, right six months you could have feelings for real, you know. You know what, Yes, trust your good you know what? I know somebody right that was with this girl whatever, like he was just like treating like a queen and all that stuff, right, So that one thing one day right like like one of my people's right, it sounds like a text, you know what I'm saying, and it's it's about it's a link to back page.

40:15 So I was like Yo, what the fuck you send me back page for? Bro? He said, noah, I look at this ship. So I pressed the link and whatever I look won't beholder to throw the other that the other dude was seeing. I'm like, on back page, isn't that? Isn't that a pornt thing? Basically? You know, like you can get everything on that. You just get anything on back page back then? Oh back page that was that. That was that was that was thing. Back you know what I'm talking like ten twelve years ago, like this. That's where the sus hang out. Yeah, you know, like you know, and and it's like and and it was like, oh, is anybody gonna tell him that?

41:01 You know? That? Is anybody gonna tell him? Does he know? No, he don't know. I'm like, well that's dangerous because she's a sushi. She's out there on back page. You don't know what she's bringing home to you, bro. The thing is like like like you know what though, like she didn't even look like you know, like the way she carried herself was like night and date. Yeah. I mean people are gonna a protending Yeah, that's the other thing. Like if you tend to only speak to or see someone at night or during you know what I'm saying like that, that that's a red flag. I feel some people won't catch or will ignore at first.

41:52 Sometimes a lot of times can be stated they may be married or in a relationship because they're. Waited to talk to you later. Like for real, I've heard of time. He's nudging her she's asleep. Hold on, but you wear it? Yeah, exactly, it's exactly. Yeah, man, that's that's that's terrible. That's terrible. All right, all right. Second question, the question, Yes, what does healthy communication in a relationship look like to you?

42:32 Mm hmm. I'll give it. I'll give it an example. No, not an example, No, no, another word. He was someone to serve him. He likes being served. No, you know what healthy with healthy relationship? Yo? Communication? Oh well check this out, Jessica. Just hold out real quick, Jessica says, when they only talk during the day when they're at worst hours. Yes, yes, that's that's what I meant, instead of the evening. Yes, like you only talk story certain times, That's what I mean.

43:18 That's usually a sign. But yes, healthy relationship. What what was the question? I guess question was God damn it? What does healthy communication and the relationship look like to. You healthy communication. Okay, dubbs, you were going to say something on healthy communication aside from getting into the kitchen. You know what the kitchen all seriousness is like when like you know, yeah, what what do you call it? When you guys are just like goofy with each other? You know what I'm saying? Like what like you know what, like you could just bob each other on your worst day, you know, like you know, like your worst days is you know, like you could be like a real shitty day and then like you see your partner whatever and then like you know, you realize that it's not that bad because you know, this one's vible with you regardless.

44:10 You know. Transparency, Yeah, you. Know like like like like to me, that's healthy. You know what else? You know, like you tell them what it is, you know, but you gotta watch. How you're saying because you know what, like like you know what if if you tell someone you know, like you know what I'm saying like like that with your tone or whatever, I love you, right, They're gonna take it as you know I'm saying as. Some aggressive. Okay you know you know. But like yo, you know, like they're gonna take it aggressive and whatnot, and you know, like that that verbal communication.

44:54 Part what else and just and just them knowing what about? What about? What I mean, I'm waiting, I'm waiting for him to be done? Oh what else? You know what I'm saying? And like, you know, like to make you a sandwich when when your football team loses. Right, yeah, that is huge, But that's not communication. That's just being a good partner and just like. About to talk things through, even if the irrational things. Okay, So healthy communication comes with honesty, transparency, and trust.

45:40 I want my partner to be able to trust and not in me, to be able to tell me what's going on. Like you're having a bad fucking day, you need time, Fine, take time, but vocalize that and then when you're ready to talk to me, I'm gonna be here. Maybe you just want me to hold you, Maybe you just want to watch a movie together and not think about something. Because men and. Women really do uh kind of like right. We express so different because you know what, in my opinion, women are more into, like they're more grounded with their feelings, so.

46:21 Like we're typically more self aware than men are. Yes, but there are men who are very self aware, and I think it's important though to be self aware. Shut me out, you know what it is. I mean, I'll be half of be half of most men. You are self aware about it too. It's just that we don't know how to say. Not everybody or women either, Not everybody is self aware, but that is a big thing to. Have, like like like look, you know what, like you know what, Like like I was going through like like perfect example, I was going through something like a couple of weeks ago, right, and it got you know, you know what I'm gonna say what you know, I'm gonna say it here, Like it got so bad that.

47:08 I was having an anxiety attack and like I didn't know you know what I'm saying, Yo, what's wrong? And then I realized I was like, Yo, you know what, I'm scared of something. You know, you're picking your nose. Bro. No, I'm not saying you're on camera, b. I know, like looking back or did he do it? You know what? Though, Like it's just that you know what I'm saying, Like I was scared of something, you know, and I didn't know how to handle that, so like I just kept so I kept on inside, and it just started eating me up, getting me up, and it's like it was hard to like you know, like accept what was what What's gonna happen? You know, like like you know, like the like there's a change coming, and it's hard to you know, like it's hard to to grasp that in, you know, because like things are going to change after that, you know. And it's like the fear of not the fear of the unknown God.

48:13 You know what I'm saying, Yes, anxiety, Anxiety is fear. And and and you know what, I could admit that, but you know what though, like like like it got me to the point where it was messing with my physical being because my how like my blood prinsure was high as ship. Right, I kept on rocking back and forth. You know, I had like a certain look in my heart, you know, like like like you know, my girl. Kept on asking like, Yo, what's wrong. I was like, Yo, I'm good, I'm right, you know, Like I didn't want to leave the house right because like my mom was like and my mom was just like you know what I'm saying, like racing the thousand miles a minute, and I was trying to figure out you know, like not you know what I'm saying, like not what was wrong, but how to come out to say it or like how to come out and express it.

48:59 So it got to the point. Where I was just like, you know, like I was rocking back and forth, and all of a sudden, I just started crying, you know, just like crying like a baby, you know, because. I was scared that. I didn't you know, like there's not that I didn't know that. I didn't want to admit it. You know, the fair part. I don't want to admit that part. You need therapy, bro, what you need therapy? I'm good, no. Melissa said. Melissa said, I need a partner who can listen to me as well as tell me anything good, bad or ugly. No, I mean, I want you to be honest with me.

49:42 But there but there's a wake there could be a. Way for someone to pick out your flaws or. Say things and. It's it doesn't come off as loving because it isn't loving. Like I don't know, explain that because I don't get it. Because okay, like. That's what you're saying. No, what I'm saying is. When a person starts to kind of like pick at you for certain things. I don't feel like that's like coming from a real honest place of like reflection. I think that's more of like, uh, these are the things that annoy me.

50:38 No, I'm not I gotta I gotta it. Uh. I think I'm gonna get into. A fight because I'm getting itchy. I don't know where I'm playing with this. I don't know. I think I'm just thinking about something specific where it's like. I know my I know them. I don't need my partner to also reiterate my flaws. This makes sense. A degrading joke is never good communication. Right, Like. I want to know the good and bad and ugly about you, Like if you want to share things about yourself, you know, I'm willing open and accepting to them. You know, if we're in a relationship but we really love each other, I'm hoping at this point we know these things about each other and we can also call each other out on our bullshit, which is good. I think that's good because sometimes we need to be grounded in that way, Like I have ADHD like a motherfucker, So I use somebody who needs to understand that, Like I might not get that done because I started it and then I went to do something else. So sometimes that's what happens, and it can be chaotic. So it's finding somebody who can like center you and be like remind you or whatever in a good way, but not be like, bitch, you're always forgetting to do this.

52:06 Like, how about lady, what do you think? Yeah? What happens to lady? J I'm here, Okay, I apologize. What was the question? Well, we were talking about healthy communication and a relationship and what it looks like to you, and we went into a whole thing about obviously, transparency, honesty, being able to share with each other your truths, the good, bad, and ugly. Yeah. I mean, healthy communication to me is not not ignoring the issues and thinking they'll just go away by themselves.

52:48 Correct. Healthy communication is talking through anything that bothers you or bothers the other person again, not shutting down sharing. And the difference between being transparent and being honest. Being honest is I'll answer you honestly if you ask me a question. But transparency is letting me know before it happens, you know such and such is going to be there. I just want to be transparent so that you know you know, I'm not going to be there with my dudes. They're going to be females there, So you know, just knowing the difference emotional intelligence, that's pretty much good communication to me.

53:37 That's that's that's a necessity. He has to have emotional intelligence. M. People definitely intelligent. I just don't know if I have. People have emotional intelligence. That's actually one of the quality is of a good leader is being able to have emotional intelligence. So being able to pick up on m if your partner's sad or something's off or I mean ideally, I feel like you're if you have a partner you see itchy. I feel like my partner's supposed to be my my other half, like my you know, like the one that kind of like completes me.

54:21 As cheesy as that sounds, but like, you know, like in a way, like I want my. Partner to be my refuge when I need it, like someone who I can go to when I am feeling shitty, and or the fact that maybe I do need some time alone and that's okay, Like and there needs to be an understanding of the difference between lady she's getting another call. Between like I lost that train of thought. You see, this is what happens.

55:02 All right, Right, I ain't laughing at you. I'm just saying, yeah, but this is what happens. Is like I was like all full of mode and then it left me. It's okay though either way. But we were talking saying the same things. Basically, we want the same things. We want somebody who's gonna be fucking honest and not be an asshole. And you know, and if you are feeling some kind of way about the relationship or something isn't working, you shouldn't wait until you blow up. Right, That's one thing. Yeah, Like I've noticed that some people tend to hold things in and assume that you know or expect you to know what they want. And it's like, no, like I've told you, I can't do that. You have to verbalize to me what's bothering you, even if you have to say it multiple times. I'm sorry it's annoying. But like sometimes it's you know, people need redirection or whatever.

56:02 It's it to me, that's normal. Yeah, absolutely, I think that that that's that's right on, that's right on an itchy nose, right, you know, you know it's it's it's definitely don't don't hold don't hold shit in because you keep bottling ship up. Then all of a sudden, one day you're blowing up and they're. Like, oh, what the fun right, right, and it becomes something completely different or bigger than what it is, when it could have just been a simple conversation to be like, hey, you know, this is my expectation of you. And I think that's a big problem that people don't speak of the expectations that they have of each other. So people are mind readers.

56:47 I learned. If I want someone to know how I'm feeling or what I'm thinking, I need to tell them exactly. And people make that mistake a lot, you know, they assume, like you you should know, you should know, and it's like, yeah, no, I don't because I have like eight hundred million things going on in this brain all the time, and I'm just trying to focus on the ship that I need to do. So no, I also can't take on whatever is happening up there in your head. Like I'm not a superhero. I wish I was. I'm a superhero. I don't give fuck. I'm a superhero, all right, superhero superhero all right? So that was. That was That was pretty good. That was really good.

57:36 Okay, what was you have another email? You son? Well do I? I don't know what you said. You're like, I got a couple of questions, then I have. I thought you said another No I got. I got the questions I did. I ran through the emails already. It was just all right. Next question, yes, all right. What is the most real relationship advice you can give someone who's in distress over their relationship? Mhm, pray to God everything will work out, so I can tell you I got a situation though.

58:18 Tell tell your partner not to eat yellow snow. That's true. Don't do that. Yeah, telling them to eat yellow snow is not a good look. That's how I got told back. Nah. But just communicate. I mean, that's that's the best advice you can give someone. Make sure if you want your relationship to last, because a lot of relationships don't last because of uncommunicated expectations. You know what I'm saying. If you you got to be able to tell your partner what it is you want. You know what I'm saying, And that includes in the bed and it bothers me. I'm gonna be honest, because a lot of guys I messed with had girlfriends I didn't know, and a lot of times it was because their girls wouldn't do things, and I would get really pissed because that would be like why are you with them?

59:23 Like I want my partner to fulfill all of it. If you can't fulfill all of it, then how are we doing this? Like how are we on the same page? Like we have to be on the same page about finances, about direction of where we're moving in life, like home where we want to live and stuff like that, or like if we want a house or apartment whatever, like an actual physical thing, and belief systems kind of have to align as well, because it's it is going to be difficult if you have different belief systems. Okay, so believe when you say relief sism, do you do you mean I.

1:00:08 Mean religion, I mean politics, I mean like drugs, addiction, mental health. You know what I'm saying, Like the things that are part of us, that are us that you know, uh, like you you can't be an empathetic person and be with someone who's the complete asphole doesn't care about other people, Like that's very difficult. To because how do you sympathize with me? How do you relate with me? If I'm here thinking about these things or I see things in this way. And I'm not saying that we have to see everything the same because we've had different life experiences, so we're bringing different perspectives to the table. But I would like us to align in some way. My husband was Muslim, he's Christian now he converted. He did, that's whatever, that's him. I am atheist. I don't believe in religion.

1:01:12 But if that's what he wants to do, go for it. You know, if that's what makes him happy, which it does, then be happy. He's exploring something different, something new in the religion world. So I'm letting him figure it out, you know. And sometimes we talk about certain things and he knows how I feel. But he never like he'll joke and say, like you need to come to church with me, you know, but but like that's his thing, and that's okay, Like I am, I'm not going to church. So that's that. So Jessica says, it comes down to what you're willing to live with and what you're not.

1:01:54 Everything he isn't going to correct. We all have our like what we consider red flags or what we consider like are. What's the word I'm trying to think of our deal breakers? We all have deal breakers, right, Like there's there's been people who have come into our lives and like certain things like I met someone and he was a complete alcoholic. Did he know he was? No? But I knew he was, And for me that was like complete turn off. And I was just like I dealt with addiction in my life, you know, with the parents that took care of us who were alcoholic and drug addicts. So for me, that's that's not a person I want to be around and be doing stuff with.

1:02:43 Boundaries. Yes, boundaries are important for not even relations like not even romantic relationships, just people relationships. Boundaries are important. We all need to have boundaries. We need to make those boundaries clear that this way, if somebody does fuck around that they can find out absolutely absolutely. So that just actually leads into the next question. She said, yes, all right, this one Melissa says, I lost loved ones from addiction and so that is.

1:03:31 A hard no, right right, Like you know what that paid feels like, you know what that is, and especially if the person doesn't realize there is the problem, and they don't want to help themselves. That's definitely not See this is the thing too with women. Oh and some men too, but they want to be this savior you know, I want you to need be in some way, and unfortunately there are relationships based. On this is complex to save your complex. Like captain save a whole. No, I don't captain. Oh damn.

1:04:12 Yeah. But but but you know what though, like those who are addicted, right, you know. That's the. People don't get addicted on anything by accident, you know what I'm saying. But addiction is a disease either you know. What, You're either chasing something. Or you're don't both. No, oh my god, we can hear you now. But you know what with addiction, right, you know, like they're doing both. They're chasing the feeling and running away from their pain. Right, it's all avoidance, Like, uh, A lot of advices are avoidance or uh, just trying to fill avoid in life because you know there's nothing exciting or life is fucking miserable and sucks and you're just waiting for the world to implode.

1:05:10 So yeah, yeah, I get it, man, I get it. No, I wasn't gonna say anything. All right, I got another question, this one you mentioned a little bit ago. Okay, okay, hold on, all right? How important? How important is sex in a long term relationship? How do you keep it alive? Well? I guess that depends on what you believe. What you believe, yes, because I my current the season of life is no marriage, but I mean no sex before marriage.

1:05:59 But talking like you're in a long term relationship. Yeah, let's say you are married. Let's say you are married. The point is how important? How important is it to you? And how do you keep it alive? I got I got that. Who wants to go before may? Well, it's very important because it's essentially almost a third of the relationship, So it's very important to keep that alive and keeping it alive. As corny as it sounds, communication is key, definitely.

1:06:41 Uh. Two is trust, trust and respect. And also, I mean the communication is a lot of different things. One communicating what you need, what you want, what you like. Trusting that the other person you know is your person so you don't have to hide those things from them. Yeah, on this rope while I chase you with the flamethrower. Yeah, well, no, it is also a completion. And I'm not no, you know, like I thought it was going somewhere and that he took me to the room.

1:07:35 Yes, I agree, sex is totally For it to be great, there needs to be trust. There needs to be trusted between the partners. No, please don't, especially while we fucking. That's up either. Okay, just let's not do that. But sex is important because at the end of the day, intimacy, I know is more than sex, but that is a big part of it. And even though just like kissing, smacking someone's ass when they pass them, or grabbing them, telling someone that they look good or they smell good, kissing someone on the neck sometimes or grabbing someone's hair whatever, like these are all the things that you could be doing to show like I want you.

1:08:33 You know. Date nights are super important. I think like if you do not try to do date nights, that's how quick and easy a relationship can fizzle. You need that one on one time and a date night could literally be at home. It doesn't even need to be out. It's just intentional time being spent together. And I think it's fun too, have fun with sex and role play or talk to each other about fantasies and kind of see if you line up with that and have fun with one another, who knows the baby you find out you both like swinging and you go to a swingers club, you never know. But this is why communication is important. That's why we need to talk about these things.

1:09:22 And it's like, first. Well, first things first, I am not inviting any of that bullshit swinging. You don't have to, it's cool. I was just bringing an example. Okay, I wasn't talking about anyone specific. Don't get it twisted. You don't want to swing from the chandeliers. That one of your fantasies. You're not chasing. Yeah, but but I mean you have to. You have to keep it live. Yeah, have to even even if you have to create situations.

1:10:04 He's watching the football game, Get down on your knees and give him a blowjob. She's making something, grab her asses and start try playing with her like there's ways to do things to remind someone you but that you want them. That you do that TG and they just look at you like you're stupid. Then they need to go okay, because if you ain't getting my love language what we're doing, I mean, that's love language. That is a love language. Well, it's just funny coming in like a wrecking ball. That's right, big sea's coming in.

1:10:45 I want to see this if we could remake that video with you on the wrecking ball. How are you. Saying everything where that's the best? The fucking like and traps assless, traps. Don't say nobody. You never know, Corny. The cameras you look at the camera like smoking, snap, he says, it's smoking.

1:11:37 Oh my goodness. Also bringing toys or different things like there's slavor loves, there's massage oils, there's uh fucking creams for edible oral stuff, and there's so many things. Yeah, I think I have to make a phone call, but it's true. There's just a lot of things. And I feel like people like, here's the thing I've done, sex toy parties. I've spoken with many wives and I don't know, it's disheartening to hear women talk about how they don't like sex or they don't want sex or whatever. Now there's different things about that too, right, I mean, if a woman is a menopause, there's a lot of shit going on that's understandable, even perimenopause, Like unfortunately, for us, like hormones are just fucking with us from forty on, like worse than ever.

1:12:44 So not everyone has a high libido. But I think a lot of the women that have told me that they didn't like something is because they haven't found a way to do it where was enjoyable for them. Like, if you're not making your partner calm, that's a problem. You need to learn how to make your partner come like And I just feel like that's kind of important to have a good sex life, Like we gotta what was to say. Pre. Perry menopause? Thank you just say it very good pre menopause.

1:13:29 It's pre menopause. Yeah, like your ten years people basically, yeah, you can't have your period for how long? Ten years before they call they say you're menopausal. And then menopause itself can last another five to ten years. And it's literally like the hormones or just completely changed. We get like hot flashes, can't sleep or too tired, or completely anxiety written, or like it's.

1:14:10 Just everything feels like sandpaper. And it's just it's not good. It's it's just one of those things. Imagine imagine what what what if your coach felt like sandpaper. Then you need to go to a doctor because you have an issue. Well, first, let's make sure we don't have an STI. And if that's not it, then let's make sure we get some good lube. That's all I'm saying. That's why there is lub. And don't get ky jelly because that's just nasty. Oh shit, I got. Well, But it is an unfortunate thing, like how men how men wind up having a reptile dysfunction, women wind up having like a loss of libido and dryness. Like it's an unfortunate thing. But it happens to both people.

1:15:02 But let me tell you something. It must start working again at one point, because I know all those retirement holes, those old people's getting down and dilreaty with all them. STIs, how did we get here? Tanya is here, That's how we got here. Ship Oh man, he brought. Up the questions. You want to talk about keeping the sex life everything you know, but it is important. I don't think it's talk about it enough because it's still taboo to a lot of people. Yeah, word, that's true. Mm hmmm. And more power to you want to be celebated, I mean, I applaud you I could never.

1:15:46 Yeah, that's just wild. I mean I think one of the one of the biggest things also is the role playing thing. Yeah I was. I once told this dude. He was like, damn you, I don't know what whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa. Okay, what. You said things important? I want to do it. I'm like, I'm like, whoa, and you want me to say ahead. A friend of mine, dude, he was a friend of mine, said to me, damn you know me and my girl, we have been beefing a lot. You know what I'm saying.

1:16:27 She's complaining about certain things, and I just don't know what to do. Like what do I do? I said, you know what you do? Bro? Why don't you guys go out go out to the bar, act like you don't know each other. Every shit on the other side of the bar. You should at one side of the bar, buy her a drink, wave at her. You know what I'm saying, Play it off like you don't know each other, walk up to one another, and we introduce yourselves to one another, and and and and play along, play and play that play that role, you know what I'm saying. Like or even you know, in the beginning, like when people are first talking and shit and they usually get very like sexual with stuff, or they'll be like setting picks and shit like that.

1:17:12 Bring that shit back. Send a hard dick pic in the middle of the day that you're thinking about me. That's fucking hot. I don't care what anyone says. I am not talking about random big picks being sent to me. I'm talking about a person I'm in a relationship with. But like you know, like. The one thing I notice is when someone starts getting that attention, that flirty attention from someone, that's when you start losing. So be flirty. Continue to be flirty in your relationship because it is work. Every relationship is work, so you need to put in that work, and that is making sure that you're providing and doing your part in the relationship.

1:18:00 It absolutely fuckingly dad, I don't know. People just annoy me like it's not that complicated, but at the same time it is because. But yeah, people people, people look at it. Hold on just because said just because you get them doesn't mean you should stop dating them. Exactly, you don't stop dating them. You were still dating That's why I said, it's important to still have dates later on in the relationship. Even if you're married, you have kids, you definitely should be going on dates. You definitely should be were kindling. I feel like, uh, that's happened in a lot of relationships too, Like people who got married had kids right away, they never found out who they were and so like after the kids leave, that's that becomes a different time. Now the ny nest, you know, it's like figuring out who am I and who are you today? And like how do we like keep bringing this in together? You know, I would be like, oh, I see now, okay. But I think that that's a mistake that people make that they think that once you got someone, they're yours. No, you got to keep them, you know, like you got to keep me, Like you can't just just say you have me and ignore me like that.

1:19:26 That's a big that's that's that's a big deal, you know what I'm saying, And that's important. Just because you're together doesn't mean that you know, right doing nothing, you know what I'm saying, We gotta. Do ship exactly. Also, I think a big teller, like if before you get married, for someone who's go on vacation with them because when you go on vacation, especially like a little road trip, those are the best ones to see like how a person is in situations, because when you're out and about on a vacation, you don't know what to expect necessarily exactly. You could get lost, There's so many things that could happen, and how your partner handles things with you shows a lot of who they are, and that's important because like, if I'm trying to go to Italy, you can't be actuit a mess scientist.

1:20:24 And you're with me. Shit right to go to Italy. But yeah, I need to renew my passport. I was recently told that there might be a Japan next year, so. There's so many cool let. Me tell you, there's so many cool things in Japan that like every time I see ship like on wheels and stuff like from. Over there, I'm just like, I want to go. I want to go so bad. They have such cool shit, and they're like. The starts knocking ship the fuck down. I'm not going to China. Let's I'm not going to China.

1:21:08 I want to go to you know what city I want to go to? And I've seen it on YouTube. It's called chang Ching, China. Look it up. They got you know, like like like like. Like the way they built it. They built it literally like it had to be built literally inside the mountain or something like not inside the mountain, but like on the mountain's edge or whatnot, because like you could be on the main floor, right, you know, and then it's like the main plaza, but then like you, but then like you walk over and there's another street like twenty like thirty feet down and there's another plaza, like it's weird, and then like you and then like they got like monorails going through buildings and all that stuff. Right, It's just it's just you know, yo, you know what they call it, like the future punk City and whatnot, like there's a game. But the only thing I know is that since twenty eighty seven at the end of the cyberpunk they call it cyberpunk City.

1:22:08 Because because of the way it looks so And I'm gonna go somewhere. I'll go over there. Japan is the only Asian country I'm interested in listening. I got a good question. Yeah, I'll go over there. With South Korea, no career. I mean maybe South Korea. We can't go to the. South Korea. China. All right, so Korea and Japan. That's it. We we we're down to two questions left, all. Right, hit it? All right? So I genuinely want to know why guys staying relationships they're unhappy and.

1:22:55 Comfort why we spend relationships? Yeah, well why why would a dude stay in a relationship he's not happy? Fear of being alone? That's it. You're starting all over again. Yeah, and some of them they stay for the kids. Mm hmm. Yeah, the responsibility because yeah. All right, that was that that that was that was a social question. But I got a better one. Okay, all right, all right, relationships, all right, relationships are transactual and there's nothing wrong with thinking that way, or is there.

1:23:46 Yeah? No, yeah, because you know what yeah, yeah, and no, yeah and no, because like you know, when you're in a relationship, you know, like you're buying you know, I'm saying, you're buying your partner things, you. Know what I'm saying. Can smile, but like it's not you know what I'm saying. It's not translating, like like you know, it's not transactional to you and the other person because you know, you guys say together, you know, like so, so that's the reason why I say yet and no, because like. You know, like money is being spent. But however, right, it's not that it's not that transactional that you know, like you're internally you're like, all right, you know what I'm saying. In other words, I'm gonna say it as blunt as I can. You know, when it's relationships are transactional is not. It's not that you're paying them the fun, you're paying them to leave, you know this one. The the other hand, when it's a relationship, you know what I'm saying, relationship like you're with them, you know, and like and like you know, like the transactional part doesn't even count, doesn't even matter because you know what, the smile, you know, you know what I'm saying, The smile matters, you know what I'm saying.

1:24:55 Like, you know, like just like you. Know you're missing what I think. I think. I probably am. I'm just because I was trans Yeah. Transaction is like you give and then I guess and then right, it's like I don't think it should be like that give give and give and take. Like because I do something nice for you doesn't mean I expect you to do anything you know to do that same thing for me. You know, I do it for you because I care and because I love you. One thing when I was married was I cooked because I enjoy cooking and because I loved him. But I also let him know the first time he comes home and the question where's my dinner is happens will be the last time I cook.

1:25:49 So it's like, because. That's my grandma, I know how to cook. I don't need no woman to cook for my ass. I know how to cook now and what I can make that guy's rights and being on real quick. So let's not get a twisted. Oh my god, she was talking for yourself about something specific, mister. Himself playing I'm just playing go ahead ahead bad So so can love? Can love actually be unconditional? Why couldn't that? But but when. You think, there's always some type of a condition. Right exactly. But when you put conditions on it, doesn't it come contractual? Become contractual?

1:26:35 No contractual is an agreement love like real love. It's it's it's not a contract, it's a covenant. It's a it's not an agreement you make, it's a promise, a dedication. You know, it's something you do together. Where a transaction is again a give and take of paying for a service type of thing, a covenant is something else. A covenant is an agreement. It's something you do together. A contract is an if or type of thing. But when I say I'm not sure it can be unconditional, is because there is always a condition, you know, like.

1:27:31 If you cheat. How do you love your children unconditionally? But you can't love another person unconditionally? Well, your children there are no conditions, there is nothing, not one thing. They could be murderers and I would still love them because they are a physical, biological part of me where loving another person can be very deep and very very very connected. But there is there's always at least one condition that would stop you from loving them. Mm hmm okay, I when you say it like that, then I understand them part. Yeah, all right, that makes sense.

1:28:13 Yeah, I mean, you know, like I may not my kids, but I won't stop loving them. Of course, always love your children, you know, like. Like especially when it comes to kids, man like like like like he said, you know, like. Like you know, like my son and my daughter could be several killers or whatever, I'm still going to love them, you know, but however, I'm not going to you know what, I'm not what they have done. I'm still don't love them, but don't touch my food.

1:28:58 You know, Like I'm still going to love you from afar. But okay, but that love doesn't go I get it, I mean, and it is scary to me, Like when I think about that, like loving someone unconditionally or just giving that much love to someone. Yeah, because you're right, like the minute if something for their curve, if a condition comes, I mean, then that's heartbreaking because you it is kind I want to give because that for me, that's what I want. I want to give. I want to be able to give all my love and wholeheartedly love this person. And you can, and you really can. But that's how we unfortunately, that's how we get a lot of the domestic violent situations is because the whole idea we put out there about loving someone unconditionally, and it's like, once I commit my life to you, I have to love you unconditionally. Well, unfortunately, it's not going to be unconditional because the moment you put your hands on me, whether I love you or not, I have to walk away from that because I'm not gonna love you to the detriment of my death right.

1:30:09 So it's the boundaries. It's like that, but we still have those boundaries. Yeah, yeah, And unfortunately, I think even if we tried, I mean, of course, there are those people out there in the world that you know, the ones that end up unfortunately killing their children or whatever. So unfortunately there are those, But are a parent who is truly a parent, you wouldn't be able to. You would not be able to put a condition on that love because even if you tried, even if you wanted to, your heart's not gonna let you. It's not gonna let you.

1:30:51 I mean, they're like you said, I think the biggest component is they are literally a biological part of you. Yeah, that is something that you created and brought into this world and not change change and like that's a responsibility. So yeah, well even I have to say, even my older daughter, who is not biologically my child, there is no condition. The same goes for her. There's nothing in this world that she could do that would make me stop loving her again, being a part of her life, being present for my granddaughter, like interacting would be different.

1:31:36 But that love it's from day one, you know, so do so by no means does it have to be that biological connection, right, it's your role in their life. It's it's that they they were given to you, loan to you for that care and for that love and the really, oh, come one, cor leone, there really really is no no love like it. There is no love like it. There's no there's no greater love than the love of a parent man. Just like there's no greater loss than the loss of a child. M hm or a loss of a symblom.

1:32:20 I mean, yes, but you're not supposed to lose your children like you're. You know, you're you're. They're supposed to be burying you, not the other way around. Yeah. I want to be frozen to what the fuck is wrong with me? Then that's what I want. Freeze me and figure out what's wrong with me, then bring me back to life. I didn't know you was rolling it dough. Wow, Like for real. I want to be frozen and then they break you apart and then you become part of the ground and they put you in like this thing with tree seeds and ship. If you come back as a tree. I want to come back as a tree. No, not compost. It's different.

1:33:03 Compost is like ship. Well, I know, is they better be a millionaire because I'm sure that she costs a lot of money. Because I have composts in my backyard and there ain't no ship in it. Business. No, it's pure. Leaves. Oh no, compost like that is different, Like you're talking about like talking about fertilizer, talking about like cow poop that they use over here. Yeah, fertilizer. It's cow ship. It's so bad. Guys. Hey, you know what what that was.

1:33:48 A good question? Is it anymore? Else? It anymore? We are done? We hit it. We did it. Hey, I podcast for being late. It was watching Majana. She couldn't, like, you know, fall asleep, so I had to like sing, hope, I. Hope it wasn't. The second one. The second one is trash. Oh wow, now now now we like that. I didn't even see the second one. The second one is gotbage. Keep singing along with the song. She's like like there, like you know, a couple of days ago, she was like that, daddy, daddy, I'm like I cried, I ain't gonna lie man.

1:34:39 All right, passed her bedtime keeping people up. That's right. Well, that's yeah, no being involved. Yeah. Anyway, with that being said, we're good. Let's just say one quick thing because you do have the hotline underneath. It is suicide Prevention month, and given the climate of the world right now, it is very easy, I feel at this time to kind of get wrapped.

1:35:19 Into all of this. People who have mental health issues with like depression, anxiety and PTSD, this is a very difficult time, very understanding. But know that you have people out here that support you. You have people out here who love you, who want you, and if you ever feel like you need to talk to somebody, please do Corleone always shares the hot line number underneath, and I think it's important that we utilize the resources that we still do have while we have them. And just know that you have.

1:36:02 Friends here and we love you and we want you to stay. So if you are feeling some kind of way, please talk to someone, because you deserve to be here. Oh French, all of a sudden we be nonplay. Yeah all right, yeah, absolutely, so it's very nice. Thank you, Jessica. So you have people offering to be, you know, someone to listen to, and I think that you know if we can't go to therapy, which sucks because I miss it, but I think therapy is a great, great, great resourced outlet that everyone should really take advantage of. And if not, just make sure you have someone that you can talk to.

1:36:59 Sometimes it's just even if somebody on Facebook Messenger and you want to shoot the ship, like you know, it's something you know, because sometimes that's what we need. We just we need a little laugh. We need we need to be reminded that you know we're loved, were cared for, or that you know people want us to be here. And I think that's important. Yes, it is most definitely great message, great message, we appreciate. We appreciate you because we got a lot of emotional damage going emotion damage, just. A lot right now. So I get it.

1:37:40 I mean I feel it too, uh like I said when we first got on, like I really do. I have a hard time getting up. Sometimes I find myself crying more. And because I'm an mpath so I really do feel things like I don't have kids and my heart is breaking for parents. So like I I'm just able to relate. I'm able to feel ship and sympathize. So like for all those mpets out there. I'm with you, Like, shit is hard, uh, you know, but it's also good to have other hobbies and ship and get off of social media sometimes. I think that's a huge thing. Go outside, get some fresh air because it's been really nice out.

1:38:26 The weather is changing. Go to a park, Go find some fucking leaves that are changing color. I don't know, but like. Change the color around you. There's not changed color around up around here yet. Well some some of it is is not a lot, but there are some words that have changed. You know, what if you know what if holding on the drava to them woodburry around their bear mountains. Yes, the leaves are definitely changing, but I guess. Up north it's a little cool, like automatically cooler or whatever. But yeah, like you know, that's what it's coming down, like, like the leaves around here don't chance until I'm like probably beginning to miss October.

1:39:12 Yeah no, so it will be because before you know it, it will be like did we have fall and then it's winter. So hopefully that doesn't happen this season. I will like fall, like it's kind of feeling like it is, like I don't know about you, guys, over here, it's been kind of like sixty seven seventy. It's really nice, except we have like one day it's really hot or like it's pouring another day. So not like over here, but like. Hey, in North Carolina, the leaves only changed for one day. Serious, it's crazy. You look. Damn, that's weird. I could see I could have lived down there.

1:39:54 Well with all that being said, man, yes, I want to thank everybody for being here tonight. Yeah, we're fallmed vulture on tonight without the fifth piece. We well, well that will don't have to worry about that. We we we got four piece, four piece chicken up at meal right. Here, talking about just make me I know right, so much right now. But thanks, thanks for coming through everybody, Thanks for all the fans listening, watching, talking, getting involved. We appreciate you. Good Night everybody, and and always remember, always keep in mind because when we talk ship, we talked ship. We got something to say, we got something to say. You want to listen, We want to listen. Listen. So that being said, I always remember that at some point this good night, everybody, night