May 21, 2026

Level 50 Unlocked Big Corleone's Birthday Bash Episode (Season Finale)

Level 50 Unlocked Big Corleone's Birthday Bash Episode (Season Finale)

Season 12's Season Finale!!! Fifty years in the game and Big Corleone just unlocked a whole new level. In this special birthday bash episode of the This Might Hurt Podcast, the crew pulls up to celebrate the life, lessons, scars, victories, and wild...

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Season 12

Season 12's Season Finale!!!

Fifty years in the game and Big Corleone just unlocked a whole new level. In this special birthday bash episode of the This Might Hurt Podcast, the crew pulls up to celebrate the life, lessons, scars, victories, and wild stories that built the man behind the mic. Nothing is off limits as Big Corleone reflects on the journey from the early grind to becoming the voice that says what others are afraid to say. Expect laughs, real talk, a few legendary stories, and the kind of unapologetic wisdom that only comes from five decades of living, learning, and surviving the chaos. This isn’t just a birthday episode it’s a celebration of growth, resilience, loyalty, and leveling up in life. Level 50 has been unlocked… and the game is far from over.

Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/this-might-hurt-podcast--3239767/support.

WEBVTT

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S s S.

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S S s. Yes, except for everybody this big called

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own of.

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This might hear podcast coming to you live most definitely live.

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Excuse me, excuse me?

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Woof great way to start the show with a fucking sneeze. Anyway,

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I just want to make sure you guys can hear me.

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I know you can see me, but if anybody's in

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the chat room, send me a thumbs up or whatever

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saying you can hear me. Thank you, thank you, thank

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you for listening to my sneezes. I appreciate it. Well, today,

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today's a big day, what I mean, but not not necessarily.

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Today's a big day, so to speak. Tomorrow is the

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biggest day. But for those who don't know, tomorrow is

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officially my fiftieth birthday. Fiftieth, all right, not twentieth, not

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twenty first, as you could tell them, not that shit.

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But hold on, let me bring in my lovely co

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host TG love. Hey, how are you?

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Oh right?

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How's everything going? It's going, it's going, You're going, all right?

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Have no idea what I'm even doing right now?

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That was your week?

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In two weeks I think they've been okay.

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Yeah, that's good. It's always good to.

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I mean, I'm here, I'm alive, and uh yeah I

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had I won.

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A giveaway for for cleaning.

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So yesterday I got someone came and clean my kitchen

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in my bathroom for free.

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It's beautiful.

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Wow, yes, shut.

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To pretty unpolished cleaning. This is a pa. So yeah,

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if you can support a small business, do it.

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Yeah. Absolutely, Gott's got to support small business. You gotta

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do it.

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I know it's bad out here as we know.

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Yeah, so so so so.

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Like I was saying before, it's it's uh, thank you.

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Your birthday podcast.

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Tomorrow is the official official fiftieth birthday fifty half a sentid.

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That's a long time.

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Oh thank god, I'm getting there. But I'm not there.

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Yes, no, you're not there yet.

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This little anyway. So it's the Big five. Oh what

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are you doing for your birth Are you celebrating? Are

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you going somewhere?

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I don't, I don't.

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I mean tomorrow the wether is supposed to be really

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really crappy up here, so I mean, I'm the kids

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are supposed to come through, hang out for a while

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and ship, you know what I mean.

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So family, yeah, dubs, good.

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So.

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We'll see what happens. I mean something's gonna pop off

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one way or the other. Yeah, so oh you're coming through, but.

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Really yeah, too far from me, friend?

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Do you know that?

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But yeah, that's way too many hours to drive in

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like one day, because if it's like three hours, I

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still have to drive three hours back because I still

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have to go to work the next day.

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We know.

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Wait, I'm confused. Go today's Wednesday? Yeah, tomorrow's Thursday, Friday?

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All right, all right, we got a couple of days

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before the week. I was like digging tomorrows Friday. I

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was getting excited.

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Who's fifty?

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Who's fifty?

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You're forgetting your days? I mean, who's the one that's.

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Oh my god? Yeah.

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Well, sometimes when you work and stuff, this happens. Even

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though I have the date in front of me on

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the computer and on a calendar, I still seem to

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forget what's happening around me. So yeah, Plus, because I

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would like schedule a lot at work, I'm constantly looking

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at future dates.

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So it's really easy to get yourself confused.

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You know.

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What, As I say, I can't read.

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It's from Amanda who had birthday? Callon hold you now

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twenty one?

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Yeah, twenty one plus plus.

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Plus plus plus plus plus plus plus plus, Amanda appreciate it.

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So I got, I got a couple of emails. I

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actually you know what I did too. I brought up,

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I wrote down some middles. I want to fuck some

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people's heads up. Oh boy, and oh we got a

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photo bomb over here, a photo bomb.

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Yeah. The little kiddy just jumped up on his little

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thing back then back here, yeah yeah, and he's like,

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look at me. I'm back here.

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I'm like a little king. And he's looking right over here.

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Too.

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Great. He's in the shop. Wonderful, right, enjoy everyone for

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your birthday. He wanted to show up.

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Yeah, I'm glad. I'm happy. So I got.

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We got two emails. I mean dove's Dove said he

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was gonna come through. Lady said she'll be through. So

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we'll we'll just started off and when they get here,

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they get you know how it is.

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Let me start off with this.

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So what's up everyone? My name is John. I need

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your help. So here we go check this shit out.

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About a month ago, I found out my wife crossed

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the line and slept with one of my so called

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good friends, not a stranger, a guy I trusted, A

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guy who sat in my house, shook my hand, drank

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my beer, and looked me in the eyes like everything

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was normal while he screwed my wife behind my back.

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Wow, what kind.

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Of betrayal hits like a brick and the teeth. Oh,

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that kind of betrayal HiT's like a brick to the teeth.

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Since then, my head's been a war zone humiliation and

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the constant urge to make somebody feel the same kind

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of bird I'm walking through with every day. Here's where

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it gets ugly. Part of me keeps thinking about his wife.

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If she finds out what her husband did with my wife,

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I've got this gut feeling she'd just be she'd be

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just as furious and may be just as willing to

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torch everything down. And yeah, the thought has crossed my

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mind more than once. Love about leveling the playing field,

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letting him wake up in the same kind of shit

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that helped that he helped create. The question eating at

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me is whether that's justice or just me sinking down

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into the same gutter that dragged that he dragged me into.

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Right now, I'm pissed en off. That revenge feels damn

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good in theory, but I don't know if it makes

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me even worse than he is. The whole situation is

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dirtier than that. But I can't get into everything. But

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what should I do? So should I?

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Oh, man?

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Should I tell his wife and let the pieces forward

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they may?

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Or should I just.

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Confront oh he hasn't even confronted them about it yet,

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about it and let the pieces fall what they may.

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Thank you. So this dude, his boy is fucking with

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his lady.

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He said that when they're both married.

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Yeah, they're both married exactly. That's that's that's the dilemma.

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I mean, my question, though, I wonder is do they

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have children? Because if there's children involved this, you're you're

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creating you're trying to create more drama where it's not needed.

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If there is no children, it still applies. You're trying

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to create more trauma that it's not needed. It is

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a gutter idea. You don't need revenge because two wrongs

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never make a right. So what what would be the

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point of that? Like, I don't think you benefit from

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like sleeping with this guy's wife, like to get back

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at him and her like and his wife Like that's stupid,

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that's petty shit. This is not a fucking movie Uh,

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I can't remember the dude's name. That's why I didn't say.

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What kind of movie.

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But his name is John.

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No, not him. I thinking about Tyler Tyler Perry. Is

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it Tyler Perry that makes the movies?

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Tyler Perry makes all kinds of relationship love exactly.

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This is one thing.

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Let's not make this a Tyler Perry movie. Okay, this

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is the reality.

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She fucked up. Honestly.

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Ooh ooh.

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What I would do.

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Is I would invite them over, right, the wife and

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the But see that's me like a Tyler Perry movie thing,

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because I'd bring them over and bring it up.

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Yeah, that makes that makes sense.

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Like I guess if that's the revenge you want, then

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then that would be it is you being the one

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to speak the truth and bring the truth to light.

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So now here's my scenario.

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But that shitl can go down different ways.

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Here's my scenario. So I invite everybody over for dinner

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right right, I'm out there, you know, whipping it up

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like I always do. TAROOKI fried chicken, veggie, fried rice

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with some egg and the rice. You know what I'm saying,

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make your lick it all good and shit, I'm all right,

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hold on, hold on, Amanda says, I say leave her

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because once a cheater, always a cheater.

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But the other wife will find out sooner or later.

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The truth always comes out.

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No, I don't agree with that, No, no, no, Okay.

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He's saying, this is one of his boys, right, okay,

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which means the wives know each other too, if that's

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the case, right, because everybody's hanging out at some point

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or another or whatever, let's say, right, because it happened

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enough that the wife hooked up with his friend, right

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and started hooking up with his friend. So that's what

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I'm getting from this. I'm getting these people are have

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hung out or been out together.

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Or whatever, and so it's not.

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As easy as well, yes, leave her. I mean, I

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wouldn't say, in a relationship with someone who would do

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some shit like that behind my back, that's fucking hurdful.

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And we're and let's be honest, it's gonna be very

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hard for that person to repair the damage and the

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trust that they broke, right.

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I don't think there's much that you could do once

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you've you've cheated in that way, like.

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Your boy, like one of your boys, and like no,

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so I feel like Yeah, she crossed the line for

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and I think that's that's enough to leave. Because I

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do agree with I don't always agree with Once a cheater,

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always a cheater, right, because it all depends on the person.

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If a person is the type of person to be

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a cheater because they're a liar and they can't take

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responsibility and accountability, then yes, for that sake, wants a cheat,

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always a cheater with that person there, unless they change,

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which they might not. Yeah, giving me back to this

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crazy like, yes, why wouldn't you say something like honestly,

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I guess the right thing to do really would be

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that to talk to the wife, like, I know what

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the fuck is going on?

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Yeah, that's why my scenario.

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Good food, some drinks, and everybody's eating, having a nice time,

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and I'm sitting there boiling and bubbling looking at them

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and I'm like, you know what, I get up and

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I say, so, how was it fucking my wife?

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I mean, that is one way to do it.

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Yes, that's how I would do it.

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I would sit right there with them, sitting right there,

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so how was it fucking my wife?

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Okay, So if you want the Tyler Perry revenge version,

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we're inviting to dinner right sitting down, not saying you shop.

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To the wife before, nothing bringing it up at the

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dinner table. Now it's known, you know, and now the

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wife knows too, or it confirms what she already.

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Who the fuck knows?

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Okay, And maybe nobody knows how to like, you know,

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maybe sometimes pulling the band aid that's what you gotta do.

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You gotta rip that fucking band aid right off and

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kind of put people in their place. And the way

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people react tell will tell more, Okay, because if they're

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truthful and admitful of their wrong that's one thing. But

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if they start asking questions back instead of answering questions

236
00:17:33.880 --> 00:17:41.480
and try to avoid or deflect, that's a problem. Yeah,

237
00:17:41.519 --> 00:17:43.400
But I feel like that says more about who a

238
00:17:43.440 --> 00:17:47.480
person is and how they handle you know, Fuck, I

239
00:17:47.519 --> 00:17:48.680
got caught.

240
00:17:49.160 --> 00:17:51.880
What do you do? You have two options when you

241
00:17:51.880 --> 00:17:54.880
get caught doing something right. You could be honest and

242
00:17:54.920 --> 00:17:59.119
own up to it, or you could double down and

243
00:17:59.160 --> 00:18:01.880
lie or whatever.

244
00:18:02.279 --> 00:18:08.559
So it would be interesting to see what comes out.

245
00:18:09.000 --> 00:18:14.160
And I'm wondering, like, how do he find out? Did

246
00:18:14.160 --> 00:18:15.480
he say he didn't say it right?

247
00:18:15.799 --> 00:18:17.480
He didn't say how he found out?

248
00:18:18.359 --> 00:18:23.799
That's interesting, like does he know this person or you know?

249
00:18:24.000 --> 00:18:29.559
Because damn damn, that'd be fucked up if it wasn't true, right, Like,

250
00:18:29.640 --> 00:18:33.079
he just assumed that that ship happened, and he blows

251
00:18:33.160 --> 00:18:33.880
up a whole thing.

252
00:18:34.039 --> 00:18:37.359
He done the Tyler Perry fucking movieset type ship.

253
00:18:37.759 --> 00:18:38.880
And nothing happened.

254
00:18:39.799 --> 00:18:42.200
Pleats get thrown. Oh damn, it was going.

255
00:18:43.359 --> 00:18:44.599
It's going down, you know.

256
00:18:47.799 --> 00:18:51.799
Yeah, But I advise him. I advise him to have

257
00:18:51.839 --> 00:18:54.079
a conversation with the wife. Don't sleep with the wife.

258
00:18:55.279 --> 00:18:56.359
Don't sleep with the wife.

259
00:18:57.319 --> 00:18:59.960
I mean, she wanted to get it in one last time,

260
00:19:00.000 --> 00:19:06.319
and maybe that's your revenge. I don't know, but I

261
00:19:06.319 --> 00:19:07.039
guess I would.

262
00:19:07.160 --> 00:19:09.480
I wouldn't be able to sleep with someone after knowing

263
00:19:09.880 --> 00:19:13.960
that you know, we're married, and you do some shit

264
00:19:14.079 --> 00:19:19.079
like that like ill so, but I think, yeah, I

265
00:19:19.119 --> 00:19:23.000
think the real thing should be talk to your wife

266
00:19:23.079 --> 00:19:28.039
and then see the reaction. Like, because right now, I'm curious,

267
00:19:28.519 --> 00:19:30.640
is this an assumption as he does he know for sure?

268
00:19:30.720 --> 00:19:34.200
If he knows for sure, then he should definitely confront

269
00:19:34.200 --> 00:19:39.039
his wife on it, right, confront his friend and give

270
00:19:39.160 --> 00:19:42.079
his friend an opportunity to tell his wife.

271
00:19:44.640 --> 00:19:46.799
But if he doesn't tell his wife.

272
00:19:48.240 --> 00:19:50.799
That would be the ultimatum there for you know, like

273
00:19:50.920 --> 00:19:53.119
if you don't tell your wife, I'm going to tell

274
00:19:53.160 --> 00:19:59.400
your wife. So that would be the politier way of

275
00:19:59.480 --> 00:20:04.519
doing thing is to one on one basically mm hmmm.

276
00:20:05.160 --> 00:20:10.400
Yeah. I don't know how. I don't know how we.

277
00:20:10.519 --> 00:20:13.000
Feel about one on one thing. I think I don't

278
00:20:13.000 --> 00:20:14.039
want to blow up the whole ship.

279
00:20:15.920 --> 00:20:21.359
I mean that's tough for you, h but.

280
00:20:22.880 --> 00:20:24.799
Like, I don't even know what your friend It could

281
00:20:24.799 --> 00:20:27.039
even just be on the phone. It doesn't have to,

282
00:20:27.279 --> 00:20:30.599
but I would rather want to see people how they

283
00:20:30.640 --> 00:20:33.079
react and shit like that. I guess the video call

284
00:20:33.119 --> 00:20:35.599
would work too, because you could just be like yo,

285
00:20:35.920 --> 00:20:39.279
is it true, like and basically saying like you need

286
00:20:39.319 --> 00:20:43.680
to tell your wife you know by tonight. If not,

287
00:20:43.799 --> 00:20:46.720
I'll know and I'm gonna let her know. And you

288
00:20:46.720 --> 00:20:49.519
could just text her.

289
00:20:50.799 --> 00:20:55.440
Damn ye know. That's wild, bro, that is wild.

290
00:20:57.880 --> 00:21:00.839
I don't am what are like?

291
00:21:01.079 --> 00:21:01.160
What?

292
00:21:01.519 --> 00:21:07.319
Why? But it makes me mad because it's like, why

293
00:21:07.359 --> 00:21:10.359
what are you avoiding in your relationship? What the hell

294
00:21:10.400 --> 00:21:11.519
did your partner do.

295
00:21:12.920 --> 00:21:17.960
Or didn't do for you to like your boys are

296
00:21:18.119 --> 00:21:20.519
just I don't know, Like this doesn't make any sense

297
00:21:20.559 --> 00:21:20.839
to me.

298
00:21:22.559 --> 00:21:25.200
Like too close to home type shit. That's weird.

299
00:21:25.960 --> 00:21:28.680
It's not that it's not just weird, it's that's the

300
00:21:28.759 --> 00:21:30.079
ultimate disrespect.

301
00:21:30.200 --> 00:21:31.000
Like what the fuck?

302
00:21:31.359 --> 00:21:36.079
But that's what I'm saying, Like, like what's like how

303
00:21:36.119 --> 00:21:40.000
did they get how? How does the friendship that's not

304
00:21:40.039 --> 00:21:44.240
even a friendship because it's more the husband that has

305
00:21:44.279 --> 00:21:50.759
the friendship with the guy. So like I don't know, Yeah,

306
00:21:50.799 --> 00:21:53.799
I think it's the level of disrespect that I'm processing

307
00:21:53.880 --> 00:21:58.839
right now, and like how like damn, Like.

308
00:21:58.839 --> 00:22:02.400
Why would you? Why are you doing that? You know

309
00:22:02.519 --> 00:22:05.359
most people do shit from at work? Why are you stupid?

310
00:22:05.640 --> 00:22:05.759
No?

311
00:22:12.240 --> 00:22:16.240
Why? Like you're killing your inner circle, You're ruining friendships

312
00:22:16.319 --> 00:22:21.839
and fucking memories and ship. Oh that's ridiculous.

313
00:22:23.200 --> 00:22:23.920
That's terrible.

314
00:22:24.680 --> 00:22:29.759
I'm mad at you, John, not you mad at your

315
00:22:29.799 --> 00:22:32.480
wife and your friends.

316
00:22:33.720 --> 00:22:38.720
Damn it's true though, it's true. Why why? Why? Why? Why? Ship?

317
00:22:38.720 --> 00:22:39.359
Will you rest?

318
00:22:39.440 --> 00:22:39.680
Kind of?

319
00:22:39.759 --> 00:22:42.039
You know what I'm saying, Like this is not.

320
00:22:44.599 --> 00:22:47.319
Like these things do happen, right, Like I've been watching

321
00:22:47.359 --> 00:22:49.920
a lot of like I D shows, so you know,

322
00:22:50.240 --> 00:22:52.319
like Evil lives Here and ship like that.

323
00:22:52.480 --> 00:22:54.400
These people are crazy. They'd be so crazy. I ask

324
00:22:54.440 --> 00:22:57.160
people out there doing something here.

325
00:22:58.359 --> 00:23:00.920
Huh the evil lives here.

326
00:23:01.319 --> 00:23:08.000
Evil lives here, but it's about actual people who's like

327
00:23:08.200 --> 00:23:15.240
brother or mother, father committed crimes murder? Did she to them? Like,

328
00:23:15.599 --> 00:23:22.799
Oh it's crazy crazy.

329
00:23:21.240 --> 00:23:26.839
Damn Evil lives here. That sounds devilish.

330
00:23:27.599 --> 00:23:32.319
I watch it on Max, But yeah, Evil lives here. Man,

331
00:23:32.400 --> 00:23:37.880
that that show there there's some really really fucked up

332
00:23:37.920 --> 00:23:38.720
people out there.

333
00:23:40.039 --> 00:23:41.319
So I think it's good to.

334
00:23:41.359 --> 00:23:45.200
Watch just because like too, Like they even say it

335
00:23:45.279 --> 00:23:49.039
in every episode, Like there were signs there were signs

336
00:23:49.119 --> 00:23:54.160
that this was going to escalate the issue with that show, well,

337
00:23:54.200 --> 00:23:57.319
not the show. The issue that I'm gathering when I

338
00:23:57.359 --> 00:24:01.480
watched the show is that our judish system just sucks.

339
00:24:01.960 --> 00:24:05.240
Like I was talking to my husband about this yesterday,

340
00:24:05.359 --> 00:24:09.200
Like the way that you like the crimes that you commit.

341
00:24:09.319 --> 00:24:11.799
There's certain crimes you commit you could get more time

342
00:24:12.480 --> 00:24:16.839
than actually attempting to murder someone and not being successful

343
00:24:16.920 --> 00:24:22.920
with it, Like your intent was to kill and somehow

344
00:24:22.960 --> 00:24:25.279
you only go to jail for like six to eight years.

345
00:24:25.400 --> 00:24:31.880
How why aren't you doing at least thirty like a

346
00:24:31.960 --> 00:24:38.039
lifespan of some kind because you try to kill someone

347
00:24:38.640 --> 00:24:43.559
and you're someone who has a pass a record criminal history.

348
00:24:43.640 --> 00:24:47.200
That's the shit that I never understand. I'm like, they

349
00:24:47.359 --> 00:24:53.119
have a record, right. It escalated to literally almost killing someone.

350
00:24:53.599 --> 00:24:59.359
Yeah, wow, hold on, let's bring in lady.

351
00:24:59.440 --> 00:25:07.000
G Oh, I'm good. How you guys doing good?

352
00:25:07.480 --> 00:25:09.759
Good? Good? How are you?

353
00:25:10.880 --> 00:25:14.640
I'm good. I had to you know, I had to

354
00:25:14.680 --> 00:25:16.240
do my peace in the church, you.

355
00:25:16.240 --> 00:25:17.759
Know, Yeah, no doubt.

356
00:25:18.279 --> 00:25:21.599
Mm hmm.

357
00:25:23.519 --> 00:25:25.519
So what are discussing right now?

358
00:25:26.000 --> 00:25:30.880
Well, John had a situation where he found out one

359
00:25:30.920 --> 00:25:32.839
of his good friends was sleeping with his wife.

360
00:25:33.880 --> 00:25:36.039
Oh age, old story.

361
00:25:36.160 --> 00:25:38.160
Yes, so he was.

362
00:25:38.240 --> 00:25:40.519
He was the baby on whether he should get revenge

363
00:25:40.640 --> 00:25:44.200
and tell the wife or with the wife and all

364
00:25:44.200 --> 00:25:45.759
this other stuff and everything.

365
00:25:46.160 --> 00:25:47.519
Not worth it, not worth it?

366
00:25:47.640 --> 00:25:50.000
Yeah, yeah, we went we went through it.

367
00:25:50.759 --> 00:25:56.240
Yeah, basically we had we have the the Tyler Perry

368
00:25:56.680 --> 00:26:02.319
drama person you could go down, which was actually pretty good.

369
00:26:02.680 --> 00:26:06.640
And because we were like, okay, this is what we do.

370
00:26:06.680 --> 00:26:09.440
We're gonna we're gonna set he was gonna invite everyone

371
00:26:09.519 --> 00:26:10.200
to work for dinner.

372
00:26:10.759 --> 00:26:11.279
Oh boy.

373
00:26:12.799 --> 00:26:17.000
And then at dinner, should you know, everybody's eating, everybody's

374
00:26:17.000 --> 00:26:19.400
like how you been blah blah blah, and he's gonna

375
00:26:19.400 --> 00:26:21.160
turn to his friend and beg so how was it

376
00:26:21.279 --> 00:26:22.119
fucking my wife?

377
00:26:22.599 --> 00:26:29.680
Oh consuls from there, that's how we lit a match

378
00:26:29.799 --> 00:26:30.480
with that bitch.

379
00:26:31.240 --> 00:26:36.640
Well, that's that's like the things that you see about

380
00:26:36.720 --> 00:26:39.599
like being at the baby shower or at the wedding

381
00:26:39.839 --> 00:26:46.839
where you know they just yeah where it's like because randomly,

382
00:26:47.720 --> 00:26:49.599
you know, let everybody know this is.

383
00:26:49.599 --> 00:26:54.160
What happened, right, we have it come out.

384
00:26:54.359 --> 00:26:57.279
But we basically said that they like he should have

385
00:26:57.319 --> 00:27:03.200
a conversation with each the wife and the friends, but

386
00:27:03.359 --> 00:27:06.279
basically tell the give the friend and ultimatum that he

387
00:27:06.319 --> 00:27:08.440
needs to tell his wife or he was going to

388
00:27:08.480 --> 00:27:09.160
tell his wife.

389
00:27:10.880 --> 00:27:16.960
Hmm okay, yeah, yeah, that's wild though, I mean how

390
00:27:18.359 --> 00:27:23.039
it's it's devastating because I mean he didn't tell us

391
00:27:23.079 --> 00:27:26.359
whether you're not kids and stuff.

392
00:27:26.039 --> 00:27:31.039
Like that, or if he knew for sure, like how

393
00:27:31.039 --> 00:27:35.680
do he find out? He didn't say, Okay, so we're

394
00:27:35.720 --> 00:27:38.160
not sure if this is an assumption being made or

395
00:27:38.160 --> 00:27:39.240
does he know for sure?

396
00:27:40.599 --> 00:27:46.240
Yeah right, but definitely I can definitely tell you it

397
00:27:46.359 --> 00:27:47.240
is devastating.

398
00:27:48.319 --> 00:27:49.759
I'm sure of course it is.

399
00:27:51.039 --> 00:27:53.759
Yeah, absolutely, that's like.

400
00:27:55.240 --> 00:27:56.359
It'll change your life.

401
00:27:56.960 --> 00:27:59.640
Yeah, how do you how do you? How do you?

402
00:28:00.119 --> 00:28:03.039
How do you juggle those emotions? You know what I'm saying, like,

403
00:28:03.079 --> 00:28:03.960
how the fuck do you.

404
00:28:05.960 --> 00:28:12.440
It took me three four years? I mean, I'm over it,

405
00:28:12.480 --> 00:28:20.039
but not like I don't stop thinking about it, you know, yeah,

406
00:28:20.039 --> 00:28:21.920
I mean it's been seven years.

407
00:28:22.359 --> 00:28:27.000
Mm hmm. I mean it ruins your trust for sure,

408
00:28:27.480 --> 00:28:30.000
that you have to put your guard up even more

409
00:28:30.359 --> 00:28:34.119
because you're you're more on a defensive than not. You

410
00:28:34.160 --> 00:28:34.519
know what.

411
00:28:35.319 --> 00:28:38.440
Let me let you know, last night, I was actually

412
00:28:38.519 --> 00:28:45.119
invited to a women's uh like a women's group, right,

413
00:28:46.960 --> 00:28:50.359
And I actually had to think, it's so funny that

414
00:28:50.400 --> 00:28:54.759
we're talking about this today. I actually had to think

415
00:28:55.039 --> 00:29:02.640
about whether my experience affected what happened to me yesterday.

416
00:29:02.680 --> 00:29:05.640
But I was invited to this woman's event like an

417
00:29:05.640 --> 00:29:11.480
hour before it started, and I was like, sure, I'll come.

418
00:29:11.640 --> 00:29:15.920
You know, you invited me. I don't have anything, you know,

419
00:29:16.880 --> 00:29:20.000
pressing or whatever, so yeah, I'll go. I went, and

420
00:29:20.079 --> 00:29:22.319
I mean all of them, well most of them. Most

421
00:29:22.319 --> 00:29:26.079
of them were women I knew, you know, wow, women

422
00:29:26.119 --> 00:29:28.440
that I go to church with and stuff like that.

423
00:29:30.200 --> 00:29:37.440
But I felt so unsafe and uncomfortable and it wasn't

424
00:29:37.519 --> 00:29:41.839
them like it was me, to the point where they,

425
00:29:42.000 --> 00:29:46.160
you know, they played like a game or whatever like icebreakers, right,

426
00:29:47.720 --> 00:29:51.160
And and you know, I actually thought about it after

427
00:29:51.200 --> 00:29:54.480
I left, because again, like that uncomfortable feeling like I

428
00:29:54.599 --> 00:29:59.000
don't trust anyone. So it's like, how how can I

429
00:29:59.079 --> 00:30:04.759
be vulnerable in this background when the reality is I

430
00:30:04.960 --> 00:30:09.400
don't trust you, I don't trust anyone. And when I

431
00:30:09.440 --> 00:30:13.359
got in my car, I actually thought about that. I

432
00:30:13.440 --> 00:30:14.759
was like, is this.

433
00:30:17.279 --> 00:30:17.960
What is this?

434
00:30:18.200 --> 00:30:18.279
Like?

435
00:30:18.440 --> 00:30:23.319
Why are you in a room full of women that

436
00:30:23.400 --> 00:30:27.359
you see on a weekly basis that you know very

437
00:30:27.400 --> 00:30:34.519
well that in certain you know places, you're chopping it

438
00:30:34.640 --> 00:30:37.279
up with them. You know, you talk, you laugh, But

439
00:30:37.440 --> 00:30:44.640
why in this little intimate group do you not panic

440
00:30:44.759 --> 00:30:46.240
but almost withdrawal.

441
00:30:47.279 --> 00:30:51.759
I'll tell you why, go ahead. You're limiting yourself, but

442
00:30:51.839 --> 00:30:56.119
not on purpose. Yeah, and it's out of fear because

443
00:30:57.000 --> 00:31:01.160
the people that you let your girl down with, who

444
00:31:01.200 --> 00:31:05.359
you were vulnerable with, who you had a friendships with,

445
00:31:06.440 --> 00:31:06.839
kurt you.

446
00:31:08.519 --> 00:31:11.759
So you are expecting it to happen again.

447
00:31:12.920 --> 00:31:15.960
And so you say to yourself, well, what the fuck,

448
00:31:16.079 --> 00:31:20.160
I'm not gonna allow myself to get fucked again. So

449
00:31:20.720 --> 00:31:22.920
I'm just not gonna allow it to happen at all.

450
00:31:24.079 --> 00:31:30.160
But doing so is not allowing you to have great

451
00:31:30.160 --> 00:31:34.920
experiences that you can actually happen. You do not need

452
00:31:34.960 --> 00:31:39.079
to be all the way vulnerable with everyone. You can

453
00:31:39.079 --> 00:31:43.640
always have your guard up, but until you start really

454
00:31:43.680 --> 00:31:47.599
getting yourself out there and just letting go little things.

455
00:31:47.920 --> 00:31:49.480
You know, it sounded like you were at a good

456
00:31:49.480 --> 00:31:56.759
event that maybe was a positive event, right, yeah, I mean.

457
00:31:57.279 --> 00:32:00.599
I don't know if part of it was again because

458
00:32:00.759 --> 00:32:05.880
I but you knew people. I definitely knew people, and

459
00:32:05.880 --> 00:32:10.359
and I knew what the organization was about. But it's

460
00:32:10.400 --> 00:32:13.880
it's almost like there was partly because I was just

461
00:32:13.960 --> 00:32:17.680
invited like an hour ago, so I didn't I didn't

462
00:32:17.720 --> 00:32:22.279
know much about the gathering, what the purpose was.

463
00:32:22.039 --> 00:32:24.640
It's like a.

464
00:32:26.880 --> 00:32:31.519
It's almost like a sisterhood type of uh thing where

465
00:32:32.599 --> 00:32:38.160
for that specific purpose is to have people. I mean,

466
00:32:38.200 --> 00:32:42.440
it's more on yeah, like it's it's on the religious

467
00:32:42.559 --> 00:32:46.720
religious level, like because of my faith and everything. But

468
00:32:47.200 --> 00:32:51.400
someone that I actually you know, look up to, you know,

469
00:32:51.480 --> 00:32:55.079
and and she created she created this program and it's

470
00:32:55.119 --> 00:32:59.240
been very very successful for a number of years. And

471
00:32:59.319 --> 00:33:02.000
again more to these women I go to church with,

472
00:33:02.160 --> 00:33:08.960
I know, uh, you know, I trust on that friendly,

473
00:33:09.119 --> 00:33:14.880
superficial level, you know, and actually really again look up

474
00:33:14.920 --> 00:33:17.799
to a lot of those women, right, So, I mean

475
00:33:17.799 --> 00:33:20.559
it's it's not like I don't know these people. It's

476
00:33:22.119 --> 00:33:24.880
but I think it just took me off. I mean

477
00:33:24.960 --> 00:33:29.960
usually I'm not great in crowds anyway, like because I

478
00:33:30.039 --> 00:33:35.160
have that tendency to absorb other people's energies and normally

479
00:33:35.319 --> 00:33:41.160
because I have that sensitivity. You know, there were some

480
00:33:41.200 --> 00:33:45.200
people there that on a regular basis, I kind of

481
00:33:45.200 --> 00:33:49.160
get that feeling like your smile and you're you know,

482
00:33:49.440 --> 00:33:51.720
you're fake, you know, just to just to put it

483
00:33:51.759 --> 00:33:56.240
plainly that I feel that, you know, you're in your

484
00:33:56.920 --> 00:34:00.839
demeanor is all for show, Like it's not genuine, it's

485
00:34:00.880 --> 00:34:03.039
not you know. And then there are others there that

486
00:34:03.119 --> 00:34:05.799
I do feel are very genuine. But I guess it

487
00:34:05.880 --> 00:34:10.400
was like a mixed company type thing, right. So and

488
00:34:10.519 --> 00:34:12.880
again I'm not great with things that I haven't been

489
00:34:12.920 --> 00:34:19.760
able to process and devour or you know, look at first,

490
00:34:20.559 --> 00:34:24.719
so I was still just kind of iffy going because

491
00:34:24.760 --> 00:34:27.079
I was like, she just told me about this, she

492
00:34:27.440 --> 00:34:32.039
just invited me, right, But because it does relate to

493
00:34:32.079 --> 00:34:35.320
my faith, and I do respect this person, you know,

494
00:34:35.440 --> 00:34:39.119
I will always be a person of my words. So yeah,

495
00:34:39.199 --> 00:34:41.960
I showed up, you know, not knowing what it was about,

496
00:34:42.519 --> 00:34:45.840
and then knowing that it's it's it's another like a

497
00:34:45.960 --> 00:34:51.440
branch off of her main event type thing, and so

498
00:34:51.480 --> 00:34:54.719
it got the impression that it's something that takes commitment,

499
00:34:55.079 --> 00:34:59.119
and you know, it's like for service, which generally I

500
00:34:59.159 --> 00:35:02.000
truly enjoy. But I do think that there was that

501
00:35:02.119 --> 00:35:09.039
part that says, I, I don't know that I want

502
00:35:09.079 --> 00:35:15.280
to or am prepared to. I don't know. I guess

503
00:35:15.400 --> 00:35:18.920
serve in something that's so something that's so dear to me.

504
00:35:19.800 --> 00:35:22.480
I'm not sure if I want to share that with you,

505
00:35:22.480 --> 00:35:28.920
you know, you know, like because like now, there are

506
00:35:28.960 --> 00:35:34.440
definitely certain parts of me that I don't feel other

507
00:35:34.559 --> 00:35:40.599
people should have access to. And as bad as this sounds,

508
00:35:40.639 --> 00:35:44.440
but sitting here thinking about this, my faith is something

509
00:35:44.480 --> 00:35:49.519
that has definitely gotten me through these last seven years.

510
00:35:49.960 --> 00:35:54.719
And yeah, I guess, I guess it is that potential,

511
00:35:54.960 --> 00:36:01.960
the potential of having that ruined by another person. You know,

512
00:36:02.039 --> 00:36:04.800
It's it's not about them and me being able to

513
00:36:04.880 --> 00:36:11.599
trust them. It's about having a man TG I tell you,

514
00:36:13.599 --> 00:36:20.679
having something that belongs to me taken away, right, Yeah,

515
00:36:21.280 --> 00:36:25.559
because if it is, it is because it's not just

516
00:36:25.760 --> 00:36:29.239
like this thing. This it's not something superficial. It's something

517
00:36:29.320 --> 00:36:32.679
that is at my core. My faith is at the

518
00:36:32.679 --> 00:36:36.280
core of my life, how I've gotten to where I'm at,

519
00:36:36.559 --> 00:36:41.559
and the idea that at some point, not that they would,

520
00:36:42.119 --> 00:36:45.960
but that they could potentially.

521
00:36:45.639 --> 00:36:49.079
But what if they don't, But that which is why I.

522
00:36:49.119 --> 00:36:52.960
Got And it could be fifty fifty. I think there's

523
00:36:52.960 --> 00:36:58.599
a way to go into this and still be able

524
00:36:58.679 --> 00:37:02.199
to feel get you to a comfort level. But I

525
00:37:02.280 --> 00:37:06.440
do I do like the fact that you do know already,

526
00:37:07.239 --> 00:37:09.559
Like if you're gonna go to an event, you need

527
00:37:09.880 --> 00:37:13.440
to know more before you're attending something that makes a

528
00:37:13.480 --> 00:37:14.039
lot of sense.

529
00:37:14.320 --> 00:37:18.239
Yeah, because I guess there's like a membership every month,

530
00:37:18.519 --> 00:37:19.239
you know, it's like, oh.

531
00:37:19.199 --> 00:37:24.559
Damn, damning, what we're getting us back.

532
00:37:28.079 --> 00:37:31.679
It's like a twenty dollars membership. It comes back to

533
00:37:31.760 --> 00:37:35.360
us in certain ways like refreshments and little gifts and

534
00:37:35.400 --> 00:37:38.679
things like that. So I have no doubt that it

535
00:37:39.280 --> 00:37:42.119
because again, this person, you know this, this woman has

536
00:37:42.840 --> 00:37:46.719
been very successful in what she does. She has this

537
00:37:46.719 --> 00:37:51.400
this event has a whole board like her right her

538
00:37:51.440 --> 00:37:55.039
program is very put together. Like I have no doubt

539
00:37:55.199 --> 00:38:00.960
that that's why she's so successful and everything. Yeah, but

540
00:38:01.000 --> 00:38:05.119
then I also have to understand like when you're when

541
00:38:05.159 --> 00:38:10.920
you're talking finances, even I'm on a limited budget, and

542
00:38:10.960 --> 00:38:15.199
it's like, oh, as much as I want to do something,

543
00:38:15.400 --> 00:38:19.960
because this is more like an actual membership cost. And

544
00:38:20.000 --> 00:38:24.000
even though in the grand scheme of things, twenty dollars

545
00:38:24.039 --> 00:38:28.199
a month, is I eat more than that in lunch

546
00:38:28.679 --> 00:38:34.039
you know chen that year? Yeah? So I mean, and

547
00:38:35.000 --> 00:38:40.119
I spend more on streaming services.

548
00:38:40.679 --> 00:38:41.400
I hear that.

549
00:38:41.920 --> 00:38:44.440
Yeah, so it's it's it's probably not that big of

550
00:38:44.480 --> 00:38:48.159
a deal. But again it's like is it worth it

551
00:38:48.239 --> 00:38:50.840
to you? I mean that's where it comes down to. Well,

552
00:38:51.039 --> 00:38:53.679
I told her to give me some information, so it's

553
00:38:53.679 --> 00:39:00.880
definitely something that I need to well consider, yeah, and

554
00:39:00.880 --> 00:39:03.920
and process and whatnot. But you know, sitting here thinking

555
00:39:03.920 --> 00:39:09.000
about those feelings, like again, it was just feeling out

556
00:39:09.079 --> 00:39:14.039
of place, like I don't belong here because the thing

557
00:39:14.159 --> 00:39:18.199
is like they do icebreakers and stuff they do like

558
00:39:18.559 --> 00:39:21.320
they had done like a person bingo where you have

559
00:39:21.400 --> 00:39:22.760
to get up and.

560
00:39:22.760 --> 00:39:24.880
Actually talk to other people.

561
00:39:25.320 --> 00:39:28.239
And the funny thing is I am a talker, Like

562
00:39:28.880 --> 00:39:32.360
I'm I'm a talker. My daughter tells me all the time, ma,

563
00:39:32.559 --> 00:39:35.599
I can't take you nowhere because you're always talking to

564
00:39:35.639 --> 00:39:38.760
people and you know, you talk to them forever in

565
00:39:38.800 --> 00:39:40.599
the day and things like that.

566
00:39:43.239 --> 00:39:46.119
But I just threw you off guard, like you said

567
00:39:46.199 --> 00:39:46.440
you were.

568
00:39:48.519 --> 00:39:50.840
It's just being contacted.

569
00:39:50.880 --> 00:39:56.559
Oh come here within an hour and yeah, you didn't

570
00:39:56.599 --> 00:39:59.679
know what was going on, and yeah, flurry of stuff

571
00:39:59.679 --> 00:40:00.119
coming and.

572
00:40:01.599 --> 00:40:03.719
Yeah, and I want to say that I want to

573
00:40:03.800 --> 00:40:06.800
chalk it up because I didn't have enough time to

574
00:40:06.880 --> 00:40:11.199
really overthink things the way I do so that it's

575
00:40:12.440 --> 00:40:16.880
palatable for me, because usually I need prior notice for

576
00:40:16.960 --> 00:40:19.599
things to think about it so that when I arrived,

577
00:40:19.679 --> 00:40:23.719
I am prepared, you know, like I'm emotionally prepared, I'm

578
00:40:24.000 --> 00:40:26.840
you know, And yeah, this was just definitely off the

579
00:40:26.880 --> 00:40:29.159
cuff and everything. So I say, I want to chalk

580
00:40:29.199 --> 00:40:31.880
it up to that. But I do realize now, especially

581
00:40:32.079 --> 00:40:35.480
talking to you guys here, and I mean, come on,

582
00:40:35.840 --> 00:40:41.199
being who I am, you know, lad, I know I

583
00:40:41.639 --> 00:40:44.880
do that psychological thing myself all the time, you know,

584
00:40:44.960 --> 00:40:47.719
but just thinking about that, we're thinking.

585
00:40:48.239 --> 00:40:50.559
So it's just better to talk to other people sometimes,

586
00:40:50.639 --> 00:40:53.239
like to put it out there so you can get

587
00:40:53.280 --> 00:40:55.199
a different perspective.

588
00:40:54.800 --> 00:40:58.920
Or you know, Yeah, and to suss out and to

589
00:40:59.000 --> 00:41:03.920
suss out those things things because I actually I just

590
00:41:03.960 --> 00:41:06.280
got home from work not too long ago, then was

591
00:41:06.280 --> 00:41:10.000
at church and all those other things, so I haven't

592
00:41:10.000 --> 00:41:12.239
had time to really think about it and even look

593
00:41:12.280 --> 00:41:14.199
at the information she gave me. But I told her,

594
00:41:14.320 --> 00:41:16.519
you know, give me information so I can look at it,

595
00:41:17.599 --> 00:41:20.119
you know, and see what this is really about, you know,

596
00:41:20.239 --> 00:41:23.800
and my understanding, it's just kind of a like a

597
00:41:23.840 --> 00:41:25.920
sisterhood type of thing, you know.

598
00:41:27.599 --> 00:41:33.039
Traveling hants.

599
00:41:33.719 --> 00:41:39.679
Yeah, but I man, but yeah, I don't between my

600
00:41:39.840 --> 00:41:43.400
job and you know, and this experience like this dude

601
00:41:43.480 --> 00:41:44.800
went through, you know, like.

602
00:41:47.239 --> 00:41:50.159
Yeah, I have another, I have another, I have another

603
00:41:50.199 --> 00:41:54.119
email that this one's pretty this is pretty wild.

604
00:41:55.559 --> 00:41:57.800
So hold on, I want to I got a riddle.

605
00:41:58.920 --> 00:42:01.760
Wait before you go to the riddle, Jesus Christ, let's

606
00:42:01.760 --> 00:42:03.800
close on what just happened here.

607
00:42:03.920 --> 00:42:10.360
But uh, I'm just interesting you.

608
00:42:11.599 --> 00:42:16.719
I think definitely, like I hope that you also get counseling.

609
00:42:17.480 --> 00:42:19.239
Oh yeah, always.

610
00:42:18.880 --> 00:42:23.840
Okay, but I think I counselors council you know, Oh yeah, definitely.

611
00:42:24.960 --> 00:42:27.880
But I think yeah, you had you said process, really

612
00:42:27.920 --> 00:42:30.039
see if it's something you can or want to do,

613
00:42:30.840 --> 00:42:35.559
and but yeah, who knows. This could be a great opportunity.

614
00:42:35.639 --> 00:42:36.880
You just don't know yet.

615
00:42:37.039 --> 00:42:41.400
So yeah, I just don't know. It's not even twenty.

616
00:42:41.079 --> 00:42:47.199
Four hours old, not at all. All right, now go

617
00:42:47.239 --> 00:42:48.119
to your damn riddle.

618
00:42:48.800 --> 00:42:53.840
All right, all right, all right, all right, now, whoever

619
00:42:54.000 --> 00:42:57.320
answers it can answer it. If you get it, let

620
00:42:57.360 --> 00:43:00.000
me know. But in the comments if you get answered,

621
00:43:00.039 --> 00:43:02.559
and I'll let you know if it's right. What begins

622
00:43:02.559 --> 00:43:04.519
with the T, ends with the T? It has a

623
00:43:04.599 --> 00:43:05.159
T in it?

624
00:43:09.920 --> 00:43:13.239
Nobody knows?

625
00:43:13.239 --> 00:43:19.239
Hold on up, kah, is it a word?

626
00:43:20.119 --> 00:43:21.519
This is what begins with the T.

627
00:43:22.199 --> 00:43:25.559
And ends with the T.

628
00:43:26.280 --> 00:43:28.719
And and has T in it?

629
00:43:28.800 --> 00:43:44.000
Oh? Man, I don't. I don't know. Emotion No, right.

630
00:43:44.400 --> 00:43:46.960
That's not right. That's not right. I felt like hitting

631
00:43:46.960 --> 00:43:47.400
the button.

632
00:43:51.199 --> 00:43:52.679
Starts with the T, ends with the T.

633
00:43:53.000 --> 00:43:58.320
Has T in it has T in it?

634
00:43:58.519 --> 00:44:05.719
Tea time, It has to end with the tea?

635
00:44:07.119 --> 00:44:09.119
How need Jeopardy music? Geez?

636
00:44:09.119 --> 00:44:10.480
I know you do.

637
00:44:10.719 --> 00:44:13.320
That would have been good. Did anyone comments? Any one

638
00:44:13.320 --> 00:44:14.000
in the comments?

639
00:44:14.039 --> 00:44:16.679
Even though no nobody's saying anything.

640
00:44:17.119 --> 00:44:25.880
Damn treatment? No what it's true, But it doesn't have

641
00:44:25.920 --> 00:44:30.960
any treat in it? Yes it does. No, it doesn't

642
00:44:33.360 --> 00:44:35.760
damn it has eat it.

643
00:44:39.559 --> 00:44:39.880
All right?

644
00:44:40.519 --> 00:44:46.599
All right? Seconds, oh, like even the dogs getting upset.

645
00:44:46.400 --> 00:45:02.159
About it, Like, con't all that ship? All right? Ready, teapot?

646
00:45:02.920 --> 00:45:05.679
I guess ah, sign up a bit? You signed up

647
00:45:05.719 --> 00:45:09.239
a bit. I had to write it down.

648
00:45:09.199 --> 00:45:11.360
I was gonna be like and I was gonna put

649
00:45:11.400 --> 00:45:13.400
tea in the beginning, but then I was like, I don't.

650
00:45:13.159 --> 00:45:16.199
Know I had something to do with too.

651
00:45:17.000 --> 00:45:18.400
Oh silly.

652
00:45:19.480 --> 00:45:21.480
Yeah, all right, let's get into this email and then

653
00:45:21.480 --> 00:45:22.719
we'll get to a couple more riittles.

654
00:45:22.719 --> 00:45:24.079
All right, so.

655
00:45:25.639 --> 00:45:30.079
Names logan, all right, logan, I'm going to keep this.

656
00:45:30.719 --> 00:45:33.440
I'm gonna try to keep the short, but I can't

657
00:45:33.480 --> 00:45:40.719
sugarcoat it. All right, I just married a woman who

658
00:45:40.800 --> 00:45:48.360
has twin boys five years old, sharp little dudes. Here's

659
00:45:48.400 --> 00:45:52.079
the problem that's been eating at me, Or here's the

660
00:45:52.079 --> 00:45:55.519
problem that's been eating at me. She's got this habit

661
00:45:55.920 --> 00:45:59.679
of running their father's name through the mud right in

662
00:45:59.679 --> 00:46:04.400
front of them. And it's not once in a while,

663
00:46:04.559 --> 00:46:09.519
it's regular. From what you told me, the relationship they

664
00:46:09.559 --> 00:46:12.719
had just fell apart and they couldn't stand each other anymore.

665
00:46:13.400 --> 00:46:19.639
Cool relationships end, that's life. But from what I can

666
00:46:19.760 --> 00:46:23.440
actually see with my own eyes. The guy shows up,

667
00:46:24.159 --> 00:46:28.519
he's there for the boys, handles his responsibilities, does what

668
00:46:28.599 --> 00:46:32.960
a father's supposed to do. Meanwhile, I'm standing there listening

669
00:46:33.000 --> 00:46:36.800
to her tear him down like he's some deadbeat and

670
00:46:36.840 --> 00:46:40.880
those kids are just sitting there soaking it up. That

671
00:46:41.239 --> 00:46:45.280
don't sit right with me at all. Truth is, every

672
00:46:45.320 --> 00:46:48.039
time she starts with it, she starts in with it.

673
00:46:48.719 --> 00:46:50.679
I feel like telling her straight up to shut the

674
00:46:50.679 --> 00:46:56.119
fuck up and cut it out. Those boys love their dad, man,

675
00:46:56.760 --> 00:47:01.400
you can see it in their faces. Feels foul watching

676
00:47:01.480 --> 00:47:06.320
someone chip away at just just because she's still bitter

677
00:47:06.639 --> 00:47:11.199
about their relationship. It's like she wants more from a

678
00:47:11.239 --> 00:47:16.679
man who's already doing more than enough. I'm the new husband,

679
00:47:17.199 --> 00:47:20.320
not their replacement father, and I don't want to come

680
00:47:20.440 --> 00:47:23.920
in swinging like I'm trying to control her. But at

681
00:47:23.920 --> 00:47:26.519
the same time, I'm not about to stand there while

682
00:47:26.559 --> 00:47:29.119
these kids get caught in the crossfire of a grown

683
00:47:29.800 --> 00:47:34.480
of a grown up resentment of grown up resentment. Sorry,

684
00:47:34.559 --> 00:47:36.800
so what so what the hell do I do here?

685
00:47:37.440 --> 00:47:40.880
Do I check her and risk blowing up my own marriage,

686
00:47:41.239 --> 00:47:44.360
or stay quiet and watch these boys slowly get poisoned

687
00:47:44.760 --> 00:47:46.119
against their own father.

688
00:47:47.719 --> 00:47:51.840
Hm, well, just I think the conversation needs to be had.

689
00:47:53.719 --> 00:48:01.039
Uhbby literally, do you stand up for children who deserve

690
00:48:01.199 --> 00:48:07.119
better from their mother, don't deserve to be traumatized by this.

691
00:48:08.480 --> 00:48:14.320
I think that you're not controlling someone if you're talking

692
00:48:14.360 --> 00:48:17.719
to someone and bringing up something that they're not seeing.

693
00:48:20.760 --> 00:48:24.280
My mother was the same way, and it only made

694
00:48:24.360 --> 00:48:30.960
me want my father more. It also affected the relationships.

695
00:48:31.639 --> 00:48:35.280
I think parents should always want a co parent and

696
00:48:35.360 --> 00:48:39.559
get to a point of co parenting. I think him

697
00:48:40.320 --> 00:48:44.880
being the husband and seeing what his wife is doing,

698
00:48:44.920 --> 00:48:48.199
there is nothing wrong with having that conversation and saying listen.

699
00:48:49.400 --> 00:48:54.480
I really think like you talking him down in front

700
00:48:54.519 --> 00:48:59.719
of them. They're five, like you know what we're doing,

701
00:48:59.760 --> 00:49:03.320
what they're doing, what she's doing to them, and what

702
00:49:03.480 --> 00:49:07.000
mixed messages it's giving because the man is actually fucking

703
00:49:07.079 --> 00:49:07.840
showing up.

704
00:49:08.239 --> 00:49:09.760
Right right, That's the thing.

705
00:49:09.840 --> 00:49:14.599
The dude's I have an issue when women do shit

706
00:49:14.840 --> 00:49:18.679
like this, and even more so when their partners stay quiet.

707
00:49:19.119 --> 00:49:22.679
He sees it's a problem. It bothers him say fucking

708
00:49:22.800 --> 00:49:29.679
something like this is the error we're in forget me too, whatever.

709
00:49:30.559 --> 00:49:35.039
If you see something that is fucked up, saying something,

710
00:49:35.800 --> 00:49:39.400
enough of the bullshit of boys will be boys, or

711
00:49:39.960 --> 00:49:44.599
this is the thing? No, Like if someone is joking

712
00:49:44.760 --> 00:49:51.360
about fucking sexual assault, shit not okay. If you see

713
00:49:51.400 --> 00:49:57.079
someone abusing or talking down to even children, just to

714
00:49:57.159 --> 00:50:00.880
the children, you need to say something. Why are like

715
00:50:01.000 --> 00:50:05.239
it's twenty twenty six. Why are we standing by still

716
00:50:06.400 --> 00:50:10.960
and not standing up for those who cannot stand up?

717
00:50:11.880 --> 00:50:15.519
Like I feel like what the fuck world?

718
00:50:15.800 --> 00:50:21.079
Seriously like like he this is not good. It is

719
00:50:21.119 --> 00:50:25.239
not good to to verbally, It's like a verbal abuse

720
00:50:25.320 --> 00:50:31.639
in a way, constantly talking down about somebody who's actually

721
00:50:31.679 --> 00:50:33.000
doing whatever they.

722
00:50:32.960 --> 00:50:36.320
Can, and then it's even and then what I would,

723
00:50:37.159 --> 00:50:39.119
and then they have they have nerve when the dude

724
00:50:39.199 --> 00:50:41.440
disappears and doesn't want to deal with them anymore.

725
00:50:42.400 --> 00:50:47.199
Exactly, you are pushing them away. Why are they gonna

726
00:50:47.199 --> 00:50:48.400
want to deal with your ass?

727
00:50:48.920 --> 00:50:52.079
They if a man is showing up and trying to

728
00:50:52.159 --> 00:50:55.559
be a pick the parent that they're supposed to be,

729
00:50:57.400 --> 00:50:59.840
why are we nitpicking? And and why are we still

730
00:51:00.239 --> 00:51:03.480
up the past? That's what it was. Why can't we

731
00:51:03.800 --> 00:51:08.599
see what's happening now and respect what's happening now when

732
00:51:08.679 --> 00:51:14.119
people are actually making attempts and trying to do this?

733
00:51:14.199 --> 00:51:17.679
Is this felt personal because I know someone who is

734
00:51:17.719 --> 00:51:21.199
going through this right now with his baby mama, and

735
00:51:21.239 --> 00:51:26.440
I think it's bullshit. I think that like if you're

736
00:51:26.519 --> 00:51:31.599
seeing especially that if like if you see that the stepparent,

737
00:51:31.639 --> 00:51:35.079
because he's a stepparent, what if he starts talking down

738
00:51:35.119 --> 00:51:37.119
to the boys or some shit like that, is she

739
00:51:37.280 --> 00:51:40.840
just gonna idly sit by, you know what I'm saying.

740
00:51:41.400 --> 00:51:43.519
Yeah, exactly, like.

741
00:51:45.159 --> 00:51:48.800
Either parent has to stand up for the children. She

742
00:51:49.280 --> 00:51:54.239
may not see what she's doing is so wrong, Okay,

743
00:51:54.400 --> 00:51:57.639
because sometimes we get stuck in our ways because she

744
00:51:57.800 --> 00:52:01.960
probably learned that behavior and is now repeating it. Get

745
00:52:02.000 --> 00:52:03.400
me and yeah, And.

746
00:52:03.360 --> 00:52:06.360
At the same time, it's like, because I see this

747
00:52:06.480 --> 00:52:12.880
on a daily basis at my work, and we as

748
00:52:12.960 --> 00:52:17.599
human beings, allow our emotions to run what we do,

749
00:52:18.000 --> 00:52:24.800
and we're so angry at the other person that we're

750
00:52:25.079 --> 00:52:31.199
using our children as tools against them, you know, which

751
00:52:31.239 --> 00:52:36.559
is unfair. It's unfair because as adults, things happen, but

752
00:52:36.599 --> 00:52:41.519
what happens between you and their father has nothing to

753
00:52:41.559 --> 00:52:45.400
do with them. And even if everything she says is

754
00:52:45.440 --> 00:52:50.320
true doesn't matter because the kids have nothing to do

755
00:52:50.400 --> 00:52:53.400
with that. Because at the end of the day, you

756
00:52:53.440 --> 00:52:58.199
can't change the fact that he's still their father. And

757
00:52:58.239 --> 00:53:01.760
you can't control other people. You can only control yourself.

758
00:53:02.800 --> 00:53:08.760
So if you have an issue, talk to talk to

759
00:53:09.079 --> 00:53:13.320
you know, your therapist, or talk to you know, other adults.

760
00:53:13.360 --> 00:53:17.320
But the kids shouldn't they shouldn't be a part of

761
00:53:17.320 --> 00:53:23.400
that because they they still have to function as his children.

762
00:53:24.360 --> 00:53:28.000
If he's doing a crappy job, let him do it

763
00:53:28.039 --> 00:53:30.480
all by himself. If he's doing it great, if he's

764
00:53:30.519 --> 00:53:33.119
doing a great job, let him do the great job

765
00:53:33.119 --> 00:53:38.719
all by himself. You know. But emotions really do lead

766
00:53:38.840 --> 00:53:43.400
people's behaviors, and sometimes we get it in our own.

767
00:53:43.239 --> 00:53:48.159
Way automatically react. People do not take the time to

768
00:53:48.320 --> 00:53:53.199
process things. You know that it's like learn behavior, Like

769
00:53:53.360 --> 00:53:55.400
that's what we learned. We learned to react right away

770
00:53:56.000 --> 00:54:02.239
in our culture, you know. Then with but but this

771
00:54:02.400 --> 00:54:05.000
is what it is. This is the learned behavior. It's

772
00:54:05.039 --> 00:54:08.159
just like, that's what it was. You just fucking start

773
00:54:08.239 --> 00:54:09.440
yelling and ship, you know.

774
00:54:13.559 --> 00:54:16.639
And the thing is too, if the guy, if the

775
00:54:16.679 --> 00:54:21.599
guy is, if he was a deadbee dude, they'll find

776
00:54:21.599 --> 00:54:23.280
that ship on their own as they get older.

777
00:54:23.480 --> 00:54:28.559
Exactly, they're gonna see it for themselves, like your actions

778
00:54:28.639 --> 00:54:32.760
speak louder than words. So but again this is giving me.

779
00:54:33.440 --> 00:54:36.480
Yeah, it is. It is difficult. It is difficult because

780
00:54:36.519 --> 00:54:40.480
it's like when something like that happens, you know, for

781
00:54:40.599 --> 00:54:43.840
whatever reason, you guys aren't together, right, he.

782
00:54:43.800 --> 00:54:47.840
Could have cheated on her, but that but that was

783
00:54:48.039 --> 00:54:51.199
on you, not on the kids. So you have to

784
00:54:51.280 --> 00:54:54.039
keep that shit separate or you need to work that

785
00:54:54.119 --> 00:54:58.679
ship out because I think it's sad like this day

786
00:54:58.719 --> 00:55:01.840
and age, it really should all be about getting to

787
00:55:02.239 --> 00:55:05.280
a position of co parenting because there are a lot

788
00:55:05.280 --> 00:55:10.800
of parents who aren't together. Yeah, so you know, it

789
00:55:10.880 --> 00:55:16.760
can exist where you can have a cordial relationship with

790
00:55:17.039 --> 00:55:21.039
the the parent other parent of your child for the

791
00:55:21.239 --> 00:55:22.320
sake of your child.

792
00:55:22.800 --> 00:55:25.679
But I also think that people in there, in either

793
00:55:25.719 --> 00:55:30.320
one of their lives do need to be caring enough

794
00:55:30.400 --> 00:55:33.800
to point out to them that this is happening, because

795
00:55:34.280 --> 00:55:36.719
I know it's it's hard to believe, but some people

796
00:55:36.760 --> 00:55:42.440
actually do these things unconsciously and are really not aware

797
00:55:43.079 --> 00:55:46.920
the way they're speaking or how it feels or looks

798
00:55:46.960 --> 00:55:50.079
to other people, or you know, they're just like, well,

799
00:55:50.159 --> 00:55:54.880
I'm just you know, expressing what happened. You know, and right,

800
00:55:55.559 --> 00:56:00.320
And it's like you need somebody sometimes to point out

801
00:56:00.360 --> 00:56:06.920
to you how that looks right, because you're just not

802
00:56:07.000 --> 00:56:10.880
aware that how you're feeling and what you're expression is

803
00:56:10.920 --> 00:56:11.599
so negative.

804
00:56:12.199 --> 00:56:21.079
Correct, Yes, the effect, the effect, So yeah, that definitely

805
00:56:21.119 --> 00:56:25.559
is emotional damage. So I say, yes, logan.

806
00:56:26.760 --> 00:56:31.360
For the twin boys, five year old boys, you need

807
00:56:31.400 --> 00:56:33.840
to speak to mom, you need to speak to your wife.

808
00:56:35.719 --> 00:56:39.079
The actions, Monica said, action is always lotter than words.

809
00:56:39.400 --> 00:56:42.239
Yeah.

810
00:56:42.800 --> 00:56:49.480
Yeah, that's that's terrible, man. I could I could, I

811
00:56:49.519 --> 00:56:52.679
could picture. I could see it in my head, her

812
00:56:53.239 --> 00:56:55.639
running her mouth fucking ship and these kids just looking

813
00:56:55.679 --> 00:56:59.480
at her like, but but but dad just did this.

814
00:56:59.440 --> 00:57:00.639
And yeah, but that.

815
00:57:01.880 --> 00:57:05.159
Yeah, but sometimes it's from hurt, you know, hurt people,

816
00:57:05.239 --> 00:57:05.800
hurt people.

817
00:57:05.960 --> 00:57:09.679
Yeah, yeah, I mean obviously she's hurt, and she's still

818
00:57:09.719 --> 00:57:13.480
relinquishing this, this depth of fucking.

819
00:57:16.320 --> 00:57:18.880
All that, all that shit she has inside. But she's

820
00:57:18.880 --> 00:57:20.760
still married some other dude.

821
00:57:21.159 --> 00:57:23.440
Right, you would think that she would be past it,

822
00:57:23.480 --> 00:57:26.400
but she obviously isn't. Like this is the thing too,

823
00:57:26.599 --> 00:57:30.840
Like people forget when you have kids with someone, they

824
00:57:30.880 --> 00:57:35.440
are involved in your life forever, right, Like, but one

825
00:57:35.480 --> 00:57:38.360
has nothing to do with the other. Corneon, like, no,

826
00:57:38.440 --> 00:57:38.760
But what.

827
00:57:38.719 --> 00:57:40.960
I'm saying is she doesn't seem to be healed enough

828
00:57:40.960 --> 00:57:43.320
from whatever the fuck she went through in the past

829
00:57:43.320 --> 00:57:44.760
for her to deal with happening.

830
00:57:44.679 --> 00:57:51.960
And necessarily, let's not let's not do that. You can

831
00:57:52.039 --> 00:57:57.079
fall in love again, yeah, but you know, it doesn't

832
00:57:57.119 --> 00:58:01.360
stop hurting. And the fact that she had children with

833
00:58:01.400 --> 00:58:04.719
this person, maybe the kids look exactly like him, They're

834
00:58:04.719 --> 00:58:10.039
a reminder, They're a reminder of what he did. And

835
00:58:10.119 --> 00:58:14.840
so unfortunately the only person she has in her life

836
00:58:14.960 --> 00:58:18.639
to be able to process that, which is not healthy.

837
00:58:18.880 --> 00:58:24.320
But the reality is is those two kids. And because

838
00:58:24.440 --> 00:58:26.239
she has to be a part of his life and

839
00:58:26.280 --> 00:58:28.559
he has to be a part of hers in whatever way,

840
00:58:30.280 --> 00:58:35.880
she may feel that that you know, she got got,

841
00:58:36.079 --> 00:58:38.440
you know, and so she wants to prevent her kids,

842
00:58:38.480 --> 00:58:43.039
so to speak, from not seeing what she experienced, which

843
00:58:43.039 --> 00:58:45.599
is again not the right way to do it, right,

844
00:58:45.679 --> 00:58:47.840
I don't think I don't think that has anything to

845
00:58:47.920 --> 00:58:54.079
do with her ability to heal relationship wise, to be

846
00:58:54.119 --> 00:58:58.320
in another relationship. It just means that she needs to

847
00:58:58.360 --> 00:59:03.320
find a better, more mature way of expressing, you know,

848
00:59:03.599 --> 00:59:06.719
that anger towards that particular person. Because no you can't

849
00:59:06.719 --> 00:59:09.039
bleed on the people that didn't cut you, So why

850
00:59:09.039 --> 00:59:11.639
couldn't she fall in love again? But she needs to

851
00:59:11.719 --> 00:59:13.199
leave the past in the past.

852
00:59:14.000 --> 00:59:18.719
Kids she was, she's bleeding on them kids.

853
00:59:19.960 --> 00:59:22.119
Yes, and that's why I said she needs to find

854
00:59:22.159 --> 00:59:32.119
a more productive and.

855
00:59:27.719 --> 00:59:30.760
And let all that out and counsely and not on

856
00:59:30.800 --> 00:59:31.760
her kids period.

857
00:59:32.360 --> 00:59:35.320
Yeah. But I think she thinks she's trying to help

858
00:59:35.360 --> 00:59:41.840
them by quote unquote informing them of who he really is.

859
00:59:41.920 --> 00:59:47.440
But it's not. That's not necessarily the way. So yeah,

860
00:59:47.719 --> 00:59:53.199
because you can't choose your parents. You can choose who

861
00:59:53.239 --> 00:59:57.159
plays the role, but you can't choose who your parents are.

862
00:59:57.719 --> 01:00:04.920
Correct. Yep, it's a crap shoot lottery, it is.

863
01:00:07.360 --> 01:00:10.719
But yeah, logan, tell your wife to get some counseling, Okay,

864
01:00:11.199 --> 01:00:14.880
so that it's just stop talking about there the kid's

865
01:00:14.920 --> 01:00:16.719
dad in front of the kids.

866
01:00:18.280 --> 01:00:20.199
Yeah, I mean, if if she was pulling, if she

867
01:00:20.280 --> 01:00:23.159
was pulling Logan aside and saying, damn you know he

868
01:00:23.159 --> 01:00:23.840
he didn't do that.

869
01:00:24.039 --> 01:00:26.119
You know she's pissed about him and talked a logan

870
01:00:26.159 --> 01:00:29.800
about it. But don't be you know, belitterally the father.

871
01:00:30.559 --> 01:00:34.920
You can talk to your husband, That's what thousands or four,

872
01:00:35.519 --> 01:00:38.199
but not you know, not in front.

873
01:00:37.960 --> 01:00:42.920
Of the kids. Yeah, that's that's and not to them either.

874
01:00:44.239 --> 01:00:49.679
Because again I I do supervise parenting, and uh, excuse me.

875
01:00:50.920 --> 01:00:54.800
Excuse you, bless you, bless you.

876
01:00:54.800 --> 01:01:01.360
You know, gosh, you know, I gave super parenting part time,

877
01:01:01.559 --> 01:01:07.039
and that is an issue. It's like both of them

878
01:01:07.800 --> 01:01:11.199
because they're so angry at each other and then they

879
01:01:11.239 --> 01:01:15.679
put each other through these hoops. Yeah, they find themselves

880
01:01:15.679 --> 01:01:18.199
in this situation where one of them can't be alone

881
01:01:19.000 --> 01:01:22.760
with their children because the other parent has you know,

882
01:01:23.840 --> 01:01:28.760
animosity towards them, and they find reasons why, you know,

883
01:01:29.199 --> 01:01:32.960
one of the parents can't see their kids by themselves.

884
01:01:33.159 --> 01:01:35.800
Some of them are very valid and legitimate concerns, but

885
01:01:35.880 --> 01:01:40.800
others are just the other parent being vindictive. One in control. Again,

886
01:01:40.880 --> 01:01:43.079
that's a big thing. People wanting to be able to

887
01:01:43.119 --> 01:01:48.360
control things, the story, you know, the narrative, the situation,

888
01:01:50.840 --> 01:01:52.880
and you know what, some of it is fear because

889
01:01:52.960 --> 01:01:56.199
you know, speaking from experience, when I first got divorced,

890
01:01:56.599 --> 01:02:02.239
that was one of my biggest fears was that he

891
01:02:02.239 --> 01:02:04.000
he would be able to take my kids from me

892
01:02:05.880 --> 01:02:10.239
because he had more resources, because he had another spouse,

893
01:02:10.280 --> 01:02:16.280
already like Heaven forbid. You know, as a mother, one

894
01:02:16.320 --> 01:02:22.039
of the worst feelings is thinking that because of that

895
01:02:22.119 --> 01:02:26.920
other parent, you could lose your child, and so, you know,

896
01:02:27.559 --> 01:02:32.760
sometimes we act out without thinking, and it doesn't help

897
01:02:32.800 --> 01:02:35.079
the situation. You know, I'm not going to sit here

898
01:02:35.119 --> 01:02:39.079
and say I haven't been guilty once or twice expressing

899
01:02:39.800 --> 01:02:46.880
my anger, frustration and hurt around my children. But you know, ultimately,

900
01:02:46.960 --> 01:02:48.440
at the end of the day, I also have to

901
01:02:48.440 --> 01:02:51.360
be honest with them and let them know what the

902
01:02:51.400 --> 01:02:55.039
good things are that are happening, you know, and reassuring

903
01:02:55.079 --> 01:02:59.719
them that their father loves them and you know that

904
01:02:59.760 --> 01:03:02.880
it's not their fault. And so it's like being a

905
01:03:02.920 --> 01:03:07.559
parent can has it's difficult moments, but that pain and

906
01:03:07.679 --> 01:03:10.960
anger it gets in the way. I mean, we've got

907
01:03:11.000 --> 01:03:16.920
people who come to this program. We're literally want nothing

908
01:03:17.039 --> 01:03:19.360
more than just to be a part of their kid's

909
01:03:19.440 --> 01:03:22.320
life and knowing because it could be male or female,

910
01:03:22.920 --> 01:03:26.719
knowing that the other parent makes things so difficult just

911
01:03:26.840 --> 01:03:31.639
because they can right, and it sucks, It really does.

912
01:03:32.559 --> 01:03:34.400
Yep. I agree.

913
01:03:34.679 --> 01:03:39.559
I don't think that that a parent should have to

914
01:03:39.599 --> 01:03:43.480
go to court in order to be able to see

915
01:03:43.480 --> 01:03:48.199
their children. Yeah, or like, I just think that's crazy

916
01:03:48.559 --> 01:03:56.079
that I don't understand how someone can have a parent

917
01:03:56.159 --> 01:03:58.320
who wants to be a part of their child's life

918
01:03:58.360 --> 01:04:04.960
and give what they can and you don't accept it

919
01:04:06.079 --> 01:04:10.000
or try to meet someone in the middle or anything

920
01:04:10.159 --> 01:04:12.679
like that for whatever the reasons may be.

921
01:04:14.239 --> 01:04:18.519
The tool box, like you were saying that maybe she's

922
01:04:18.559 --> 01:04:21.639
not able, that's how she learned, you know.

923
01:04:21.800 --> 01:04:24.920
Yeah, I mean, I'm sure I'm not even going to

924
01:04:25.039 --> 01:04:28.039
try to even understand the mindset of this person.

925
01:04:28.840 --> 01:04:30.719
But I think that like.

926
01:04:32.199 --> 01:04:35.320
If you say you're struggling though, and things are hard

927
01:04:35.360 --> 01:04:37.679
and you can't afford things, and you have someone who

928
01:04:37.719 --> 01:04:41.039
is willing to buy those things, Like why isn't that

929
01:04:41.079 --> 01:04:41.599
good enough?

930
01:04:42.559 --> 01:04:46.039
Yeah, you need to allow it, you know, like if

931
01:04:46.039 --> 01:04:49.159
you just think if they're not providing you, you have

932
01:04:49.239 --> 01:04:52.800
every right, you actually have a responsibility to go after

933
01:04:52.840 --> 01:04:56.119
that person for their share, you know, for the sake

934
01:04:56.199 --> 01:05:00.000
of your children, you know, because you didn't make these

935
01:05:00.159 --> 01:05:01.280
children by yourself.

936
01:05:01.280 --> 01:05:05.480
You shouldn't, not at all by yourself, Not at all.

937
01:05:05.599 --> 01:05:07.599
But I have had a lot of feelings, not a

938
01:05:07.679 --> 01:05:14.000
lot of things, dealing with this whole situation of people

939
01:05:15.400 --> 01:05:19.719
just baby Mama drama, but I think a lot of

940
01:05:19.760 --> 01:05:24.480
times it's very unnecessary. Shit, it's just like people would

941
01:05:24.519 --> 01:05:29.719
just fucking communicate and have a conversation. Yes, so many

942
01:05:29.840 --> 01:05:30.760
things could.

943
01:05:30.599 --> 01:05:35.039
Get better, Like it's like, honestly, at this point, I've

944
01:05:35.039 --> 01:05:37.599
told my friend that I think he needs a mediator,

945
01:05:38.320 --> 01:05:40.960
and I think that that might be like the best

946
01:05:41.000 --> 01:05:43.400
way to be able to sit down and have a conversation,

947
01:05:43.480 --> 01:05:45.880
because it's not gonna happen any other way, it seems.

948
01:05:46.400 --> 01:05:50.280
And honestly, someone having to go through the court system,

949
01:05:50.679 --> 01:05:53.760
You're talking ten thousand dollars. Who the fuck has ten

950
01:05:53.840 --> 01:05:57.639
thousand dollars to go to court to see your children?

951
01:05:57.719 --> 01:06:01.559
That's ridiculous. It should not cost.

952
01:06:01.280 --> 01:06:05.000
That much for people to bring their you know, the

953
01:06:05.280 --> 01:06:08.880
the other parents of court to like just for them

954
01:06:08.920 --> 01:06:10.960
to get the rights to be like, yes, you know,

955
01:06:11.039 --> 01:06:17.119
this parent can also see their child, like insane.

956
01:06:17.760 --> 01:06:21.480
And and a lot of times again, some of the

957
01:06:21.519 --> 01:06:25.000
excuses I've heard are, why should they be able to

958
01:06:25.039 --> 01:06:29.679
see the kid if they're not paying their support or

959
01:06:29.719 --> 01:06:32.320
whatever whatever one has nothing to do with the other.

960
01:06:32.320 --> 01:06:37.280
You greedy bitch. I will no tway, well no, Like

961
01:06:37.320 --> 01:06:38.000
I said.

962
01:06:37.800 --> 01:06:41.559
Some have really valid concerns, but in the overall thing,

963
01:06:42.559 --> 01:06:45.320
whether they pay support or not, has nothing to do

964
01:06:45.360 --> 01:06:47.679
with their right to be a part of that child's

965
01:06:47.679 --> 01:06:51.480
life or see them, right. You know, I honestly have

966
01:06:51.559 --> 01:06:55.119
to say that in my you know, my divorced situations,

967
01:06:55.719 --> 01:07:02.559
it never crossed my mind to stop my children from

968
01:07:02.599 --> 01:07:07.159
seeing their dad. Like It's never It never crossed my mind. Yes,

969
01:07:07.320 --> 01:07:10.400
I'll go after him for what you need and all

970
01:07:10.440 --> 01:07:13.320
this stuff, but one thing has nothing to do with

971
01:07:13.360 --> 01:07:17.039
the other. Yeah, you know, I'll take care of the

972
01:07:17.119 --> 01:07:20.320
legal stuff, but that has nothing to do with his

973
01:07:20.519 --> 01:07:23.239
right to be a dad.

974
01:07:23.920 --> 01:07:28.679
I think, I think, I think also to be a

975
01:07:28.800 --> 01:07:31.800
parent that takes care of a child. And it's more

976
01:07:31.840 --> 01:07:36.119
than financial. It's also an emotional It is a thing.

977
01:07:36.239 --> 01:07:41.559
You have to be there emotionally, and you know, up, yeah,

978
01:07:41.599 --> 01:07:42.480
you got to show up.

979
01:07:43.000 --> 01:07:44.800
If you don't give them a chance to show up,

980
01:07:49.880 --> 01:07:50.719
you gotta be there.

981
01:07:50.719 --> 01:07:54.920
You gotta physically be there. And the thing is too

982
01:07:55.000 --> 01:07:57.880
hold on real quick. I feel. This is my opinion.

983
01:07:59.000 --> 01:08:05.039
I feel every I know. I feel that every child

984
01:08:05.159 --> 01:08:11.360
needs some kind of male role model or some kind

985
01:08:11.400 --> 01:08:15.440
of male figure in their lives, whether whether especially especially

986
01:08:15.599 --> 01:08:18.800
for young men. You know what I'm saying, I mean,

987
01:08:18.840 --> 01:08:22.000
because a lot a lot of women. I'm not saying

988
01:08:22.039 --> 01:08:24.880
all women. I'm just saying some women. They seem to

989
01:08:24.920 --> 01:08:31.039
think that not having a father or a father figure

990
01:08:31.520 --> 01:08:34.920
or some kind of male in a positive male in

991
01:08:34.960 --> 01:08:38.800
a kid in a boy's life, the kid's going to

992
01:08:38.880 --> 01:08:43.000
do the boy's going to grow up fine.

993
01:08:43.159 --> 01:08:47.479
But again that's probably because that woman had such problems

994
01:08:47.960 --> 01:08:51.680
with them in their relationship. She's not counting him as

995
01:08:51.720 --> 01:08:55.159
a positive male role model because she's angry.

996
01:08:56.039 --> 01:08:58.520
Right.

997
01:08:58.560 --> 01:09:00.319
I just want to throw a little fact chown there

998
01:09:00.399 --> 01:09:03.199
that there has actually been researched done on this that

999
01:09:04.680 --> 01:09:08.720
males born I mean males grown up in a single home,

1000
01:09:09.359 --> 01:09:11.760
I mean children grown up in a single home with

1001
01:09:11.800 --> 01:09:15.680
a mother actually do worse than children in a single

1002
01:09:15.680 --> 01:09:19.199
home with a father. So I don't know what that says.

1003
01:09:20.079 --> 01:09:25.199
Correlations can be made all day, but I think it's important,

1004
01:09:25.239 --> 01:09:27.880
like you said, to make sure that there.

1005
01:09:27.560 --> 01:09:31.600
Are those father figures out. I don't you know what.

1006
01:09:31.760 --> 01:09:34.479
I hate even saying male or father figure because it

1007
01:09:34.640 --> 01:09:38.800
reminds me of just the patriarchy just ruining the world.

1008
01:09:39.319 --> 01:09:42.039
But I think what it really is is that there

1009
01:09:42.159 --> 01:09:45.319
just needs to be some kind of support system and

1010
01:09:45.439 --> 01:09:48.880
other people besides mom that a kid can go to

1011
01:09:49.600 --> 01:09:51.880
or besides dad that a kid can go And there

1012
01:09:51.920 --> 01:09:56.000
are things that a mom can't can do that a

1013
01:09:56.079 --> 01:10:02.079
dad can't. So they need both, they need right, And

1014
01:10:02.119 --> 01:10:03.119
that's not.

1015
01:10:02.960 --> 01:10:08.039
To like also hit on gay couples and things like that.

1016
01:10:08.239 --> 01:10:12.800
I feel like there's still love there with two parents,

1017
01:10:13.399 --> 01:10:19.039
but it's different to have femininity or a masculine type

1018
01:10:19.079 --> 01:10:21.119
of energy around.

1019
01:10:21.239 --> 01:10:26.560
I guess you and you learn, like, I don't know,

1020
01:10:26.600 --> 01:10:30.039
there's just so many things like a girl, it would

1021
01:10:30.079 --> 01:10:32.520
just be harder, like puberty and all that shit.

1022
01:10:32.800 --> 01:10:36.319
And that's what I think about right away. It's like

1023
01:10:36.840 --> 01:10:39.800
these cute babies, they all turn into teenagers one day.

1024
01:10:40.039 --> 01:10:43.359
They all go through that tween phase, which I think

1025
01:10:43.439 --> 01:10:45.600
is like the scariest phase. I don't know how you

1026
01:10:45.600 --> 01:10:46.239
guys did it.

1027
01:10:46.359 --> 01:10:52.560
But well, even in like like interracial couples, right, I

1028
01:10:52.560 --> 01:10:54.399
don't think it has much to do with the male

1029
01:10:54.479 --> 01:10:59.479
female part. But for instance, you know, my children are

1030
01:10:59.680 --> 01:11:04.680
are half African American, and so when I ask him

1031
01:11:04.880 --> 01:11:10.039
to speak to them about what that's like, you know,

1032
01:11:10.720 --> 01:11:17.319
being Latina, actually being a white Latina, I don't necessarily

1033
01:11:19.159 --> 01:11:23.319
have that frame of reference that point of view that

1034
01:11:23.479 --> 01:11:28.560
he could give her. So it's like, if he won't

1035
01:11:28.560 --> 01:11:33.000
communicate with me or vice versa, how can you effectively

1036
01:11:33.199 --> 01:11:37.159
navigate that? You know? And it's like, come on, like,

1037
01:11:37.439 --> 01:11:42.199
you have something that she needs and if I'm trying

1038
01:11:42.239 --> 01:11:45.079
to keep that from her, I'm doing her a disservice,

1039
01:11:46.760 --> 01:11:47.039
you know.

1040
01:11:47.239 --> 01:11:59.560
So yeah, all enquir yep you. But I couldn't see

1041
01:11:59.560 --> 01:12:00.520
what a comment and said.

1042
01:12:01.000 --> 01:12:06.239
Oh I said, Monica says every child needs both parents.

1043
01:12:08.600 --> 01:12:09.560
I mean that's ideal.

1044
01:12:11.840 --> 01:12:14.399
Need to get out of our egos mm hmm.

1045
01:12:16.520 --> 01:12:20.199
Ego trip. Yeah, damn.

1046
01:12:20.399 --> 01:12:24.199
All right, So I'm gonna be I'm gonna be straight up.

1047
01:12:24.840 --> 01:12:30.000
I think my internet went out. What because my phone

1048
01:12:30.760 --> 01:12:33.039
is on five G and and I have I have

1049
01:12:33.159 --> 01:12:37.359
the Wi Fi connected to the computer from my phone.

1050
01:12:38.960 --> 01:12:39.439
I have that.

1051
01:12:39.600 --> 01:12:42.079
I have that set in case my internet goes out

1052
01:12:42.159 --> 01:12:46.520
for something that's crazy. We're getting we're getting nasty storms

1053
01:12:46.600 --> 01:12:47.159
up this way.

1054
01:12:47.680 --> 01:12:50.880
Oh yeah, here too. Actually there's a lot of like

1055
01:12:51.000 --> 01:12:52.000
lightning and thunder.

1056
01:12:53.039 --> 01:12:58.119
My wife my WiFi, Oh my lord, WiFi is connected

1057
01:12:58.119 --> 01:12:59.199
to my phone right now.

1058
01:13:00.119 --> 01:13:02.560
That's crazy technology.

1059
01:13:03.159 --> 01:13:07.119
Yes, I purposely do that every episode so in case

1060
01:13:07.199 --> 01:13:11.159
something happens, right, you got back up. It smoothly connects

1061
01:13:11.159 --> 01:13:11.800
to my phone.

1062
01:13:12.319 --> 01:13:13.399
Oh my goodness.

1063
01:13:14.720 --> 01:13:20.800
So oh yeah, you guys are getting like thunderstorms and

1064
01:13:20.800 --> 01:13:21.520
stuff out there.

1065
01:13:21.600 --> 01:13:25.279
Yeah, it's it was supposed to be. Yeah, it's just

1066
01:13:25.479 --> 01:13:26.399
right now it is. Yeah.

1067
01:13:26.760 --> 01:13:29.800
Here, we had a tornado Jersey and we're having that too.

1068
01:13:30.439 --> 01:13:32.319
We had a tornado warning earlier.

1069
01:13:32.840 --> 01:13:34.199
Oh, tornadoes.

1070
01:13:38.479 --> 01:13:41.560
It's not funny. It's funny until there's a cow flying around.

1071
01:13:41.880 --> 01:13:42.640
Yeah, exactly.

1072
01:13:43.439 --> 01:13:46.119
Uh, ship, Well, I'm gonna I'm gonna do one more

1073
01:13:46.199 --> 01:13:50.920
riddle and then we're gonna be out, all right, all right,

1074
01:13:52.840 --> 01:13:57.039
What comes once a minute, twice a moment, but never

1075
01:13:57.079 --> 01:13:58.319
in a thousand years?

1076
01:14:08.439 --> 01:14:08.920
Repeat it?

1077
01:14:14.039 --> 01:14:17.800
What comes once a minute, twice a moment, but never

1078
01:14:17.880 --> 01:14:19.000
in a thousand years?

1079
01:14:27.439 --> 01:14:29.359
M hm hm.

1080
01:14:33.279 --> 01:14:35.760
Nod. Excuse me, something really stupid.

1081
01:14:35.840 --> 01:14:39.079
I'm not gonna be mad, all right, You ready for

1082
01:14:39.119 --> 01:14:42.439
the answer? The letter?

1083
01:14:42.600 --> 01:14:58.439
M the letter? What un believable? Get the fuck out

1084
01:14:58.479 --> 01:14:59.680
of here, exactly.

1085
01:14:59.680 --> 01:15:14.680
That's yeah, well hmmm, doves couldn't make it tonight.

1086
01:15:14.760 --> 01:15:18.760
He's not feeling well, feel better, do.

1087
01:15:23.319 --> 01:15:25.279
Well? Thank you.

1088
01:15:26.199 --> 01:15:32.079
Everybody's coming to a nice time. Nice riddles, nice emails. Logan,

1089
01:15:32.760 --> 01:15:37.119
talk to your wife now, tell us she can't. She

1090
01:15:37.159 --> 01:15:39.079
can't keep doing that ship. That's just not cool.

1091
01:15:41.039 --> 01:15:41.359
John.

1092
01:15:42.039 --> 01:15:46.399
Yeah, but yeah, let's not first.

1093
01:15:47.119 --> 01:15:50.920
And then and then John, as far as I'm concerned,

1094
01:15:51.560 --> 01:15:59.640
have dinner with everybody, sacky fried chicken, Reggie and as

1095
01:15:59.680 --> 01:16:03.079
everybody was eating, just get up and like being with

1096
01:16:03.119 --> 01:16:07.079
my wife. You know what I'm saying. Just just be

1097
01:16:07.159 --> 01:16:14.119
honest about it. So I appreciate you guys for coming through.

1098
01:16:14.279 --> 01:16:16.520
Of course, I appreciate everybody.

1099
01:16:17.000 --> 01:16:19.279
We hope you have a happy birthday.

1100
01:16:20.159 --> 01:16:23.520
Yes, sir, old as dirt.

1101
01:16:24.399 --> 01:16:28.960
Yeah, it is dirt older than I am half half

1102
01:16:29.279 --> 01:16:33.600
I'm half a century old. Wow, yeah, half a centurio.

1103
01:16:34.279 --> 01:16:36.720
I got a long way to go, so you too.

1104
01:16:38.479 --> 01:16:40.920
So with that being said, thank you everybody for stopping by.

1105
01:16:41.000 --> 01:16:43.359
Thank you for coming into the chat room and talking

1106
01:16:43.399 --> 01:16:46.399
with us. Thanks for dealing with my stupid ass riddles.

1107
01:16:46.960 --> 01:16:48.680
Figured them out. They weren't stupid.

1108
01:16:49.680 --> 01:16:50.159
You know what.

1109
01:16:50.359 --> 01:16:55.720
I hate games, So.

1110
01:16:58.479 --> 01:17:02.199
Thanks, appreciate it, and always remember that at some point

1111
01:17:03.079 --> 01:17:04.279
this year.

1112
01:17:05.399 --> 01:17:07.079
Good night, everybody, Good night,