March 1, 2026

Love Lost In Translation

Love Lost In Translation

Love Lost In Translation isn’t about cheating. It isn’t about betrayal. It’s about two people standing in the same room… speaking different emotional languages. On this raw episode of This Might Hurt Podcast, your host Big Corleone and co-hosts TG...

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Season 12

Love Lost In Translation isn’t about cheating.
It isn’t about betrayal.
It’s about two people standing in the same room… speaking different emotional languages.
On this raw episode of This Might Hurt Podcast, your host Big Corleone and co-hosts TG Love, Lady G, and Dubs Tha Don dig into what really happens when communication collapses when “I’m trying” sounds like “you don’t care,” when silence becomes a punishment, and when love starts feeling like a constant misunderstanding instead of a safe place. We talk about unspoken expectations, tone versus intent, defensive listening, emotional exhaustion, and the slow death that happens when nobody feels heard anymore.
This isn’t couples therapy.
This is real talk.
If you’ve ever asked yourself, “Are we falling out of love… or are we just failing to understand each other?” ......this episode might hurt. But it might save you too. 

Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/this-might-hurt-podcast--3239767/support.

WEBVTT

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Has everything has happens everything else.

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Say it's up, everybody, this big cole of the This

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Might Heard podcast coming to you live. I don't know

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from wherever, make up a place. I don't care if

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you never land, just as long as not never Land ranch,

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just wherever. I don't care where you think we're from.

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We're just live and we're here now. So with that

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being said, let me bring in my lovely co host

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TG Love.

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Hello, Hello, how are you good?

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That's good? That was your your week to two weeks? Really?

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Damn, I can't even remember what happens. Well, it's snow,

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but it didn't hit us the way it hit you.

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Guys.

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Let me tell you something. Twenty plus inches of fucking snow.

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You all got a blizzard?

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Yeah, and then talk about more snow next week. Yeah,

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I know, mother ship mother Nah.

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It's it's pissed off. I don't blame her.

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I didn't use too. I don't know why the fuck

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she's blaming me.

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You're mad at everybody?

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Yeah, it's fucking crazy. Twenty something inches. That's nice.

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I know a lot.

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Actually, so.

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Hi, Hello, how you doing.

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That?

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Kind of hello from my friend, my.

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My my two weeks is pretty good. Not too bad.

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Just did some ship, you know. I I tried. I

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tried to play in the snow. It didn't work. It

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didn't work too well. Just I realized going outside while

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it was snowing and throwing myself around just to see

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how it felt in it. Definitely, No, it's not the same.

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I'm afraid if I go down, I won't get back up.

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Like that's it for me.

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Yeah. There was one point. There was one point when

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I was laying there and I was like, can I

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even get up? I had to like roll over, lift

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myself up and get up. It was. It was a disaster. Yeah, yeah,

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freaking disaster.

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Oh man, oh my goodness.

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Yeah yeah, we got snore, well, you got snow. I

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didn't get the snow, thank goodness. We were very happy.

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Our snow is like actually like melted most most of

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it except the huge mounds.

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You know that they.

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Those mountains are going to be around to freaking April something.

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Yeah, and then, like you said, we're supposed to get more.

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And I'm trying to think, Oh, do you watch that

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show The Night of the Seven Kingdoms that was called.

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No Ah.

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It's like a Game of Thrones, a prequel of like

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one of the Nights. The prequel, well, it's just a

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prequel to Game of Thrones. The House of Dragons is

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a prequel to the prequel that like goes back to

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the Targarian family. But but yeah, I don't know, I

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have I've just brought it up because I just have

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mixed feelings about it. And there's only six episodes in

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the season, and I think that's stupid.

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So yeah, like, don't how.

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What's this How six to eight episodes is a mini series,

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like it's a series on Netflix and all this other stuff.

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Six episodes is not a season. I'm sorry. You need

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to do better, HBO Max. This is disappointing.

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Yeah, yeah, it's it's it's terrible. I don't believe they

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even did that. Why they even bother?

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Yeah, like at least ten episodes, like make it make sense.

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And it was like such a slow like it's like

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Game of Throws, you know, likes to tell the story

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and stuff and give you, like you something so that

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when ship.

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Hits, it hits hard. You can't do that in six episodes.

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Like it was weak. I don't know, I don't know.

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All right, doves just showed up, So let's let's get

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that doubs. Come in here. What's up?

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Yott from the Madhouse.

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You're good.

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I'm doing launching. I'm doing launchy B. So like you

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know what I mean, like you know, doing the mad stuff,

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you know, like not like like you know, like really

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you know this? Yeah, yeah, you know, came in here

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real quick, about like twenty five minutes or so. I'm

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about to put everybody on pause over real quick so

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I can run back, you know, throw everything in the

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dry forty five Yeah, you know, like come back in

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here for like forty something minutes, you know what I mean,

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And like yo, you know whatever, he's still on on

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you know, like you want to see me, you know

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what I'm saying.

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Full clothes, that would be great.

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Listen, you know what Coldon knows how I get down,

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Like especially with my clothes, Like I'm very finicky, like

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you know, like my pants always got.

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To go on like it's it's it's it's like some

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it's real life old CD.

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My pants go you know, in the bottom and they're

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like you know, like heavy shirts going you know what

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I'm saying, on top of the pants and then like

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everything to like you know, like the lights up you know,

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because like it's easy for me to like you know,

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like when I get upstairs, you know, like distribute where

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my clothes either.

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Go right, all right, all right cool? So yeah, with that,

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with that being said, let's get into the first the

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first email of the show. This is from question what's

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up ge?

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How many interest? Pause? You know what I'm saying? How

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many Innswess you got snow out there?

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We didn't get any in my area, but there were

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parts of Pennsylvania that did. But Central p most of

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Central Prea did not get much snow.

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It was beautiful.

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When I got up and I went to my car,

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there was nothing. It's nice and then you your your

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car was buried.

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But oh yeah, but yeah, but see here's the thing though,

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Like the snow was so light. The snow was like

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to shovel off, but it was just so much right,

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So you know, like I ended up like you know,

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helping like you know, elderly people and whatever. You know,

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I'm almost to shovel out four cars until my back

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like literally gave out.

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I was like, oh, I was like, yeah, you gotta

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be careful.

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Yeah, but but but like at the same time, there

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was like, you know, love that neighbor.

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I suppose you know, I mean that was so you know,

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and and and you know, the thing is and the

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thing is, you know, like they try to offer me

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money man, and I'm like, you know, like i I'm like,

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I'm like, nah, man, I ain't.

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I don't know. Times are hard, bro, Yeah, all right?

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So and then you know what I'm saying. I've seen

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some people are here sniffing it, and I was like, Yo,

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what are you doing.

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It's not that thing, It's not that kind of Now,

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what's wrong with you?

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So I got Yeah, I got this email from Yeah,

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Donny P Donny p P. All right, so that is

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what it says. I'm writing because I feel like my

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marriage isn't dying from hate, it's dying from misunderstanding. My

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wife and I still love each other, I know we do,

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but somewhere along the way we stop hearing each other.

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When I say I'm stressed, she hears distance. When I

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say when she says she needs space, I hear rejection.

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The conversations that used to be they used to feel safe,

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now feel like battlegrounds. And half the time we're arguing

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about tone instead of truth. I don't like either of us.

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Oh.

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I don't think either of us is trying to hurt

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the other, but it feels like everything gets filtered through

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defense instead of empathy. It's like we're speaking two different

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emotional languages, and no matter how much we talk, the

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message keeps getting lost in translation. So I need your

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advice on how to fix something when the love is

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still there but the understanding isn't. How do I approach

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her without sounding like I'm blaming her? How do I

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say I miss us without turning it into You're not enough?

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I don't want that. I don't want silence to become

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the weapon that ends this. But I also don't know

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how to break the cycle without making it worse. From

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your perspective, is is this something that can be rebuilt

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or is it the beginning of the end when communication

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starts to fall apart. I'm willing to do the work.

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I just don't know where to start, all.

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Right, you know what, Let's just say, you know, like

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she's one of those, you know, one of those types

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I love, like to go for a drive or whatever

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that you know, like bring her somewhere where, like you know,

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we're you guys had the best memories, like you know,

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like like small things like you know, like just going

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for a rod. They just you know, like just like

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do something. Rams ain't let's go for a rod.

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You know.

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You're talking about rekindling, trying to rekindlect.

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Thank you, that's the word.

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That's the word, like, you know, like something small like

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like for instance, right, let's just say you know, her

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thing was like you know, going down the shore.

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I mean, and this is what you're saying in this

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in this way.

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Yeah, but how how would that be fixing communication issues?

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Simple?

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He didn't say.

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He didn't say that their their marriage is withering because

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they're not spending time together. It's there's issues in the

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relationship because there there's miscommunication somewhere and there's a loss

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of that I guess what they once had communication. So

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I personally don't think it's our place to tell them

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there isn't us the right way to do this except

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to be honest and say, like, I feel like something

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is up, And what do you think about couple's therapy

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because I think that someone I think that.

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We listen.

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We no, not because just like we ain't giving medical

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advice because we're not doctors.

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This is just opinions. But I think, but I do

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think that like this is this is.

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Definitely one of those instances where a couple should go

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to couple's therapy because he just said, I want to

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do the work, but I think it's better to have

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someone there to be to really be able to listen

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and then be able to make sure that both parties

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are hearing the same thing, because it's difficult, especially when

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you're with someone, you're married to someone, you've been with someone,

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you kind of get in this rut and it's like

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hard to like have those conversations because there it's hard

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to kind of like maneuver and gear that conversation with somebody,

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especially when you can't pinpoint what's wrong, right, Like we

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don't really know what the issue is, but it sounds

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like it's just a miscommunication. Like they're missing marks there, right,

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And yeah, they need to be honest with each other.

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So do you think do you think that setting setting

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time aside every day to talk about each other's day,

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how things are going, how they're feeling, what they're going through,

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and just be open when that time is being shared together,

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you don't think that that's something they can They can try,

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I mean to just to get the conversation going.

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I think that this is deeper than just having talking

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to each other on the every day, Like he basically

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said that, like their communication has become stressed. There's a

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distance between them. When she wants space, he's taking it

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as rejection. When she when he's feeling stressed, she's taking

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it as distance. So they're not communicating already, like what's

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going on? So like, and then they're taking it the

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wrong way too. So yeah, you can't sit down and

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have a conversation and be like I feel like when

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I say these things like maybe you're taking it this way,

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and instead of just making assumptions, it's better just hear

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it out of the horse's mouth, right, the same goal, Right,

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I'd rather hear it out of the person telling me like, hey,

233
00:15:59.080 --> 00:16:03.759
I feel like rejected when you, you know, tell me

234
00:16:03.840 --> 00:16:07.320
you need space, but you're not really saying much like

235
00:16:08.159 --> 00:16:10.080
how can we navigate?

236
00:16:10.159 --> 00:16:12.960
Like how can we move forward with this? Where what

237
00:16:13.159 --> 00:16:13.919
is supporting you?

238
00:16:14.080 --> 00:16:14.240
Look?

239
00:16:14.399 --> 00:16:14.440
Like?

240
00:16:14.639 --> 00:16:18.080
I think people need to start asking the other their partner,

241
00:16:19.000 --> 00:16:21.759
what does love and support look like to you? Like

242
00:16:22.480 --> 00:16:26.200
when you're having a bad day and you say like

243
00:16:26.360 --> 00:16:29.240
you need some space, how much time do you need?

244
00:16:29.919 --> 00:16:32.279
Is this something that like you need the whole night

245
00:16:32.399 --> 00:16:34.360
or do you just need an hour to yourself and

246
00:16:34.480 --> 00:16:36.919
then you could come and talk to me, because I

247
00:16:37.039 --> 00:16:40.440
think like it shouldn't take more than some time to

248
00:16:40.559 --> 00:16:44.879
process and decompress your day, because if it's taking more

249
00:16:44.960 --> 00:16:48.279
than that, then you have a problem because you shouldn't

250
00:16:48.279 --> 00:16:52.240
be bringing work home. You should really be leaving all

251
00:16:52.320 --> 00:16:56.000
that shit outside and when you come home it should

252
00:16:56.000 --> 00:16:59.320
be about what's under your roof and what's happening. And

253
00:17:01.559 --> 00:17:07.920
so yes to rekindling, obviously that's helpful. Yes to trying

254
00:17:08.000 --> 00:17:11.440
to to We've said this time is time before keep

255
00:17:11.440 --> 00:17:14.240
going on dates. You have to keep dating each other,

256
00:17:15.319 --> 00:17:18.880
like to keep keep that romance alive you have even

257
00:17:18.920 --> 00:17:21.200
if you have kids, you have to get a babysitter

258
00:17:21.799 --> 00:17:24.680
and you have to go out, like you have to

259
00:17:24.759 --> 00:17:25.680
have time on your own.

260
00:17:25.720 --> 00:17:26.799
You have to talk.

261
00:17:26.880 --> 00:17:29.039
You have to make another baby, No.

262
00:17:29.480 --> 00:17:35.240
Do not make The economy is not not good for that.

263
00:17:36.200 --> 00:17:38.279
The world is not very nice right now.

264
00:17:39.720 --> 00:17:41.599
No more, no more babies.

265
00:17:42.160 --> 00:17:46.000
But I think I think my bad But but you

266
00:17:46.039 --> 00:17:49.359
know all jokes aside. I mean, like like you know, whatever,

267
00:17:49.440 --> 00:17:50.559
everything you say is right.

268
00:17:50.599 --> 00:17:52.559
But at the same time, that was like it's like,

269
00:17:52.599 --> 00:17:55.759
you know what, like do something out of the ordinary,

270
00:17:55.880 --> 00:17:57.920
like you know, like I mean, you know this weather,

271
00:17:58.480 --> 00:18:00.599
this weather is not permissible for like you know, one

272
00:18:00.640 --> 00:18:02.160
of those picnics where like you know, you get a

273
00:18:02.200 --> 00:18:03.200
blanket in the park or whatever.

274
00:18:03.240 --> 00:18:04.599
It's not missible for that yet.

275
00:18:05.720 --> 00:18:07.599
But keep that in mind though, you know, like like

276
00:18:07.680 --> 00:18:09.519
you know, like try to like work towards that part,

277
00:18:09.880 --> 00:18:13.000
you know, like out of nowhere, just like you know what,

278
00:18:13.720 --> 00:18:15.559
let's go do something that you know, like like you know,

279
00:18:15.680 --> 00:18:17.519
like let's just say you know you did it before,

280
00:18:18.119 --> 00:18:18.640
do it again.

281
00:18:19.720 --> 00:18:23.119
I mean, just because of knowing doesn't mean people can't

282
00:18:23.160 --> 00:18:26.599
do things. You can go ice skating, you could get

283
00:18:26.680 --> 00:18:31.000
hot chocolate somewhere. You could like there's horse riding in

284
00:18:31.079 --> 00:18:31.480
New York.

285
00:18:33.920 --> 00:18:34.839
That's just expensive.

286
00:18:34.880 --> 00:18:37.920
Bro hold on, you know, it's pretty hold on. You know,

287
00:18:38.000 --> 00:18:41.559
it's pretty dope going to the beach in the winter time.

288
00:18:42.079 --> 00:18:45.400
Oh yeah, wat mm hmm.

289
00:18:47.079 --> 00:18:53.359
That's really nice to not or I don't give the

290
00:18:53.400 --> 00:18:54.920
beach not.

291
00:18:57.240 --> 00:18:59.160
This a couple of years ago, right, I went down

292
00:18:59.200 --> 00:19:03.559
to I'm without a point pleasant, Right, I had my

293
00:19:03.720 --> 00:19:06.039
radio and I had like my beach ship.

294
00:19:06.880 --> 00:19:08.680
I had, you know, like like I was prepared for

295
00:19:08.759 --> 00:19:09.039
the weather.

296
00:19:10.000 --> 00:19:11.640
I just sat down there and you know, listening to

297
00:19:11.799 --> 00:19:14.960
like you know, like music and stuff, right, and just

298
00:19:15.039 --> 00:19:16.599
listening to the waves, and I just felt like, you know,

299
00:19:17.599 --> 00:19:19.039
at peace, right.

300
00:19:19.440 --> 00:19:21.240
And then it was a full moon night on top.

301
00:19:21.119 --> 00:19:22.519
Of that too, and I had to take a picture

302
00:19:22.519 --> 00:19:24.519
of it, man, because it was beautiful because like the

303
00:19:24.599 --> 00:19:26.960
moonlight was reflecting off the ocean, you know, off the

304
00:19:27.000 --> 00:19:27.519
ocean waves.

305
00:19:28.079 --> 00:19:28.400
Pretty.

306
00:19:29.079 --> 00:19:32.079
I was like, yo, you know what, man, Like, as

307
00:19:32.160 --> 00:19:33.799
much as I hate the state, I love the state.

308
00:19:33.839 --> 00:19:37.839
At the same time, Christina saying, play Uno or board games.

309
00:19:38.319 --> 00:19:40.839
I mean, if you're into that, I'll tell you what.

310
00:19:41.680 --> 00:19:45.960
I rather play Phrase ten.

311
00:19:46.119 --> 00:19:49.799
But I think that, you know what, playing Uno and

312
00:19:49.880 --> 00:19:52.680
this climate is not good because if the green cards

313
00:19:52.720 --> 00:19:54.319
are missing, you know what I mean, like, its gonna

314
00:19:54.319 --> 00:19:54.799
be a problem.

315
00:19:59.319 --> 00:20:01.440
Oh ship, Yeah, but I'm deadly with that draw full.

316
00:20:01.480 --> 00:20:08.039
Don't fuck with me. I'll catch you. It's harder to

317
00:20:08.240 --> 00:20:12.240
you know, like yeah, and the ship is too. Is

318
00:20:12.319 --> 00:20:14.519
that when when you do ship like that, like when

319
00:20:14.559 --> 00:20:16.920
you go to do things with your partner and you

320
00:20:17.000 --> 00:20:19.559
go to share things with your partner, I think it's

321
00:20:19.720 --> 00:20:25.440
it's important to understand that do it for each other

322
00:20:26.680 --> 00:20:28.720
not because the other wants to do it, but do

323
00:20:28.839 --> 00:20:30.640
it for each other. Like, this is something that's going

324
00:20:30.720 --> 00:20:33.359
to bring us together. This is something that we're going

325
00:20:33.440 --> 00:20:36.200
to share together. I'm not doing it just for you.

326
00:20:36.319 --> 00:20:37.599
I'm doing it for me as well.

327
00:20:39.799 --> 00:20:45.480
Quick, So al right, okay, Yeah, Like there's so many

328
00:20:45.599 --> 00:20:51.200
beats that you can go on. There's acts throwing the pottery,

329
00:20:51.640 --> 00:20:59.039
there's painting stuff, there's the painting wine things or whatever. Man,

330
00:20:59.200 --> 00:21:02.519
there's there's shit out there, and nobody's saying either you

331
00:21:02.640 --> 00:21:06.200
have to go crazy spending money. Like literally, you could

332
00:21:06.319 --> 00:21:09.680
even have like a movie night together in your house

333
00:21:10.359 --> 00:21:13.440
and have the snacks and stuff, go to dollar try

334
00:21:13.720 --> 00:21:15.799
and get the top you.

335
00:21:15.799 --> 00:21:17.559
Know, whatever you would get at the movie theater.

336
00:21:18.000 --> 00:21:20.160
You get the popcorn, you get the snacks that you

337
00:21:20.200 --> 00:21:23.279
would have at the movie theater, and your drinks. So

338
00:21:23.440 --> 00:21:27.440
you make it special in that way. But but yeah,

339
00:21:27.559 --> 00:21:30.720
this is more than just having a couple of conversations.

340
00:21:30.799 --> 00:21:34.039
I think this is like what couples get to this place.

341
00:21:35.400 --> 00:21:38.680
I think like it's they've already you've already proven that

342
00:21:38.759 --> 00:21:43.200
you're already having a difficult time communicating, so it doesn't

343
00:21:43.279 --> 00:21:46.039
hurt to bring someone else in At that point to

344
00:21:46.279 --> 00:21:49.720
help you communicate. Then you can really get shipped out

345
00:21:50.519 --> 00:21:52.799
and you'll have somebody to guide you to do it

346
00:21:52.960 --> 00:21:58.480
in a respectful way that allows you, guys to get

347
00:21:59.400 --> 00:22:01.319
answers to any questions that you have.

348
00:22:02.319 --> 00:22:10.480
Right, right, You're absolutely right. I just I just personally

349
00:22:10.559 --> 00:22:14.720
think that, you know, setting time aside for each other.

350
00:22:14.720 --> 00:22:17.359
Is important, very important, you know.

351
00:22:18.000 --> 00:22:22.599
I mean I don't know if you guys are drinkers,

352
00:22:22.799 --> 00:22:24.880
go to go to a dive bar or some act

353
00:22:24.960 --> 00:22:25.960
like you don't know each other and.

354
00:22:27.599 --> 00:22:30.440
Have fun that way, right, you know.

355
00:22:30.720 --> 00:22:34.200
I mean you know how some people after work they'll

356
00:22:34.200 --> 00:22:37.720
go with their coworkers to get a drink, like do

357
00:22:37.960 --> 00:22:42.680
that ship meet up after for drink together or something,

358
00:22:43.160 --> 00:22:45.880
and then go from there and see what happens. But

359
00:22:46.160 --> 00:22:50.720
like there's I think we get like in a box sometimes,

360
00:22:51.680 --> 00:22:56.559
like even in our even with like dinner, food and

361
00:22:56.599 --> 00:22:59.319
ship like that. Like your brain just like so quick

362
00:22:59.440 --> 00:23:02.319
to be like, oh, I don't have options, you know,

363
00:23:02.519 --> 00:23:05.160
Like I like, there isn't I don't know what to do.

364
00:23:05.359 --> 00:23:08.440
I don't you know, And then I'm like, no, there

365
00:23:08.519 --> 00:23:11.440
aren't options. It's just that like we don't know all

366
00:23:11.480 --> 00:23:15.039
of them sometimes or we forget about them. And that's

367
00:23:15.759 --> 00:23:18.720
that's when the interwebs are our friends, you know, and

368
00:23:18.880 --> 00:23:21.599
we can look up shit try and figure it out.

369
00:23:22.240 --> 00:23:23.359
Oh, even cook together.

370
00:23:23.599 --> 00:23:27.200
That's I'm just gonna say, make cookies or something together,

371
00:23:27.519 --> 00:23:28.480
Like I.

372
00:23:28.480 --> 00:23:30.599
Wouldn't think I wouldn't think cookies. I was thinking more

373
00:23:30.680 --> 00:23:32.359
like rice beans.

374
00:23:33.599 --> 00:23:37.440
That it all. But I'm saying, like you could do

375
00:23:37.519 --> 00:23:38.240
something homemade.

376
00:23:38.279 --> 00:23:43.359
You can make bread, like there's there's things that like, yeah,

377
00:23:43.440 --> 00:23:45.400
you don't have to go to a cooking class, but

378
00:23:45.839 --> 00:23:48.839
you can fick up a recipe and try it together,

379
00:23:49.680 --> 00:23:53.240
like you know, especially for people who don't have money.

380
00:23:53.680 --> 00:23:55.880
That's when you have to think outside the box. Like

381
00:23:56.880 --> 00:24:00.960
have a fucking like a chef off game between the

382
00:24:01.079 --> 00:24:03.640
two of you or something fun like that, like.

383
00:24:06.640 --> 00:24:09.200
What they play for favors, Play for.

384
00:24:09.319 --> 00:24:14.240
Favours, strip over. I mean, who says you're limited? There's

385
00:24:14.319 --> 00:24:17.960
so many things, But I think that's the thing. Sometimes, Yeah,

386
00:24:18.039 --> 00:24:20.400
you get stuck in your head and you're not thinking

387
00:24:21.000 --> 00:24:23.519
about all of the I have a cat liking my

388
00:24:23.680 --> 00:24:26.960
arm Hi, he's so weird.

389
00:24:27.519 --> 00:24:31.039
And then after then, after you bake the cookies, you

390
00:24:31.119 --> 00:24:32.279
get to eat the cookies.

391
00:24:33.799 --> 00:24:35.039
You get to eat the cookies.

392
00:24:36.799 --> 00:24:41.039
And that's and that's the thing some women like to

393
00:24:41.400 --> 00:24:46.640
have their cookies eating. Yeah, you know that cookie.

394
00:24:51.839 --> 00:24:54.240
So much dairy on the cookie, that's just.

395
00:24:56.519 --> 00:24:56.839
Cookie.

396
00:24:57.200 --> 00:25:02.759
You see him, he's he's here somewhere. What are you

397
00:25:02.839 --> 00:25:06.359
part of the show. Oh, he's in my face?

398
00:25:10.079 --> 00:25:11.880
What if he just smacked the out of you right now?

399
00:25:12.319 --> 00:25:17.000
From the videos I watch, like sometimes I expect one

400
00:25:17.039 --> 00:25:19.519
of them to do that to me, especially when I

401
00:25:19.599 --> 00:25:22.359
try to pick him up, because he'll like he'll put

402
00:25:22.440 --> 00:25:24.759
his but like push me, like.

403
00:25:25.400 --> 00:25:29.240
Oh he almost fell. He's like using me as leverage.

404
00:25:29.279 --> 00:25:29.880
Holy ship.

405
00:25:31.920 --> 00:25:34.960
Yeah, So I guess that's that's pretty much. That's pretty much.

406
00:25:36.559 --> 00:25:40.440
So yeah, definitely, we gave you some ideas and suggestions,

407
00:25:40.880 --> 00:25:43.200
but I definitely think couples therapy is going to be

408
00:25:43.279 --> 00:25:47.359
the most helpful because I feel like it's so helpful

409
00:25:47.480 --> 00:25:52.759
just to have that that bias, that unbiased opinion of

410
00:25:52.920 --> 00:25:56.799
someone who's not in the relationship, doesn't know either of you, they.

411
00:25:56.839 --> 00:25:59.759
Actually you know.

412
00:26:00.559 --> 00:26:07.519
Yeah, yeah, yeah, all right, that's that's that's cool.

413
00:26:07.960 --> 00:26:10.359
All right, what's email? There's a second one.

414
00:26:10.279 --> 00:26:19.559
Right, there's a second email. Let me get it. Madi

415
00:26:21.519 --> 00:26:25.920
may remember remember that that that Spanish hope opera Marii malin.

416
00:26:26.720 --> 00:26:29.599
I think I remember the name of that, but I didn't.

417
00:26:30.000 --> 00:26:31.079
I wasn't big into the.

418
00:26:31.640 --> 00:26:41.799
Novels telemon though. All right, so all right, I love him,

419
00:26:42.519 --> 00:26:44.079
but I'm starving for more.

420
00:26:44.759 --> 00:26:45.359
Mm hmmmm.

421
00:26:46.640 --> 00:26:50.359
I love my boyfriend. He's solid. Hold on, let me

422
00:26:50.440 --> 00:27:00.559
get hold on. Look what a man says? Yes, mind,

423
00:27:00.960 --> 00:27:06.880
I love that show. All right, hold on? That was

424
00:27:06.920 --> 00:27:07.279
just bad.

425
00:27:08.079 --> 00:27:12.960
Hey man, there's no reception die here as you can see,

426
00:27:13.000 --> 00:27:19.400
you know, like that's a bounce smoke banging man like

427
00:27:19.680 --> 00:27:23.319
and know I want to like massive game, bro. But

428
00:27:23.400 --> 00:27:25.039
hold on, Matt, I'll be back.

429
00:27:26.519 --> 00:27:34.720
Oh my lord, Yeah, no, no, yeah.

430
00:27:35.319 --> 00:27:39.200
I love my boyfriend. He's solid. He shows up in

431
00:27:39.319 --> 00:27:44.799
a lot of ways, But sexually, I feel invisible. I

432
00:27:44.880 --> 00:27:47.519
don't feel wanted the way I need to feel wanted.

433
00:27:48.960 --> 00:27:52.680
And that silence that he pulls, that that that comes

434
00:27:52.759 --> 00:27:56.119
up whenever sex is involved, is starting to turn into resentment.

435
00:27:57.400 --> 00:28:00.920
I'm not asking for porn, star energy or circus tricks.

436
00:28:01.680 --> 00:28:06.079
I'm asking to feel desired, pursued, and chosen. I miss

437
00:28:06.240 --> 00:28:10.279
being touched without having to initiate. I miss feeling like

438
00:28:10.400 --> 00:28:13.519
he can't wait to get his hands on me. Instead,

439
00:28:13.680 --> 00:28:17.519
I feel like I'm negotiating for intimacy, and that shit

440
00:28:17.640 --> 00:28:22.160
messes up, messing with my confidence and my femininity and

441
00:28:22.319 --> 00:28:25.799
my sense of connection to him. I don't want to cheat,

442
00:28:26.799 --> 00:28:29.880
I don't want to threaten. I don't want to beg

443
00:28:30.599 --> 00:28:32.519
but I also don't want to live in a relationship

444
00:28:32.559 --> 00:28:37.000
where my body feels like an afterthought. I don't know

445
00:28:37.240 --> 00:28:40.000
what to say. Oh, I don't know how to say

446
00:28:40.039 --> 00:28:44.519
I need more sex without him hearing you're failing as

447
00:28:44.599 --> 00:28:48.680
a man or shutting down completely. I don't know how

448
00:28:48.720 --> 00:28:53.400
to explain that this isn't just about orgasms, It's about bonding,

449
00:28:53.599 --> 00:28:58.279
closeness and feeling claimed by my partner. How do I

450
00:28:58.359 --> 00:29:04.119
communicate this without self unding, selfish, desperate or I don't

451
00:29:04.119 --> 00:29:06.359
even know how to pronounce this word or that word?

452
00:29:08.119 --> 00:29:14.400
And and at what point do I decide that mismatched

453
00:29:14.640 --> 00:29:19.440
sex drives are a real compatibility issue instead of something

454
00:29:19.559 --> 00:29:24.160
you keep swallowing. I want to fight for this relationship,

455
00:29:24.240 --> 00:29:26.400
but I don't know how to lose. I don't want

456
00:29:26.440 --> 00:29:29.279
to lose myself in the process. I need your real,

457
00:29:30.960 --> 00:29:39.960
unsugarcoated advice, all right, So you guys have two completely

458
00:29:40.000 --> 00:29:45.559
different sex drives that's that's a problem, and it's and

459
00:29:45.839 --> 00:29:47.920
what makes what makes it even and now this is

460
00:29:47.960 --> 00:29:51.359
my opinion, what makes it even worse is that she

461
00:29:51.720 --> 00:29:54.960
has the hyper sex drive. Because when I think when

462
00:29:54.960 --> 00:29:58.400
a woman has the hyper sex drive and not the

463
00:29:58.559 --> 00:30:02.599
dude emotionally, it affects them more than it would a dude,

464
00:30:03.559 --> 00:30:04.160
you know what I mean?

465
00:30:04.519 --> 00:30:07.720
Yeah, yeah, I could see that because because the woman

466
00:30:07.880 --> 00:30:12.279
would tie in lack of sex as lack of wanting

467
00:30:13.079 --> 00:30:17.960
being wanted and chosen, like she said so, and it

468
00:30:18.079 --> 00:30:22.200
may not be that. Again, I think it's a communication.

469
00:30:22.880 --> 00:30:25.680
There has to be that conversation of like what's going on,

470
00:30:29.079 --> 00:30:36.720
and it's not selfish or wrong to want more because

471
00:30:37.319 --> 00:30:38.279
that's what you need.

472
00:30:38.759 --> 00:30:41.400
Like I think that.

473
00:30:43.680 --> 00:30:47.880
There's a misconception that men are always warning all the time,

474
00:30:48.839 --> 00:30:53.759
but it really comes down to a person, Like everybody

475
00:30:53.839 --> 00:30:59.119
is fucking different, Like everybody's hormones are different, everybody deals

476
00:30:59.200 --> 00:31:03.440
with things different. Some people get in their heads so

477
00:31:03.599 --> 00:31:07.400
much and get so stressed that they they don't get

478
00:31:07.440 --> 00:31:09.680
in the mood, like that's the last thing they're trying

479
00:31:09.720 --> 00:31:13.440
to think about, right, But then you have people who

480
00:31:13.519 --> 00:31:17.720
get stressed and that is something that helps them to

481
00:31:18.200 --> 00:31:21.240
like unwine, unstressed.

482
00:31:20.759 --> 00:31:21.599
And stuff like that.

483
00:31:23.240 --> 00:31:25.799
He might need to get his sosterone levels checked.

484
00:31:26.839 --> 00:31:31.319
I mean, that's unfair to say, because, like I'm curious,

485
00:31:32.160 --> 00:31:35.440
were they was it always where they had sex all

486
00:31:35.480 --> 00:31:39.799
the time, or is it that this is what it's

487
00:31:39.920 --> 00:31:42.799
been but it's not enough for her?

488
00:31:43.319 --> 00:31:47.119
That's my question to Mary, because.

489
00:31:48.480 --> 00:31:52.200
There was If there was a shift, right, that's yeah,

490
00:31:52.279 --> 00:31:53.480
then there's a bigger problem.

491
00:31:54.000 --> 00:31:54.160
Right.

492
00:31:54.519 --> 00:31:57.720
But if this is like sex has been what it

493
00:31:57.960 --> 00:32:01.599
is and it's good, but you want more, that's a

494
00:32:01.680 --> 00:32:06.640
different conversation. And that's not selfish either, because again, these

495
00:32:06.680 --> 00:32:10.079
are your needs, right, so your sexual needs matter too.

496
00:32:10.359 --> 00:32:13.799
So like if she needs.

497
00:32:15.440 --> 00:32:19.279
If she needs him to be more affectionate, because that's

498
00:32:19.319 --> 00:32:21.880
what I'm hearing. I'm hearing she wants to be touched more.

499
00:32:22.039 --> 00:32:25.839
She wants to be she wants to feel like she's wanted.

500
00:32:26.400 --> 00:32:30.319
She wants to feel like he wants to fuck her

501
00:32:30.480 --> 00:32:31.759
every time he looks at her.

502
00:32:32.359 --> 00:32:33.200
I understand what.

503
00:32:33.319 --> 00:32:37.759
She is saying, like, and I think that that's what

504
00:32:37.880 --> 00:32:41.039
needs to be communicated. Like it's interesting we were talking

505
00:32:41.039 --> 00:32:43.880
about love is blind, but that is actually a conversation

506
00:32:44.000 --> 00:32:49.200
that comes up with some couples there because the woman again,

507
00:32:49.680 --> 00:32:53.880
that touching my ass when you walk by, or telling

508
00:32:53.960 --> 00:32:56.559
me I'm pretty or I look cute today or whatever,

509
00:32:57.079 --> 00:33:01.599
all these things that helps shut down the insecurities that

510
00:33:01.799 --> 00:33:02.440
she may have.

511
00:33:03.160 --> 00:33:06.799
Hold one second, hold that thought one second. Let me

512
00:33:06.880 --> 00:33:08.599
bring in, lady G.

513
00:33:11.559 --> 00:33:11.839
People.

514
00:33:15.440 --> 00:33:18.319
I'm at a conference, so you know I couldn't get

515
00:33:18.319 --> 00:33:18.880
here till now.

516
00:33:19.640 --> 00:33:23.359
Wow, we'll welcome, Yeah, welcome in.

517
00:33:24.079 --> 00:33:24.400
Thank you?

518
00:33:25.079 --> 00:33:29.039
All right, that's okay, TG. Continue.

519
00:33:29.839 --> 00:33:33.160
So we were just talking about this email.

520
00:33:34.799 --> 00:33:40.920
That he read, uh where Basically, Ah, it comes down to,

521
00:33:41.319 --> 00:33:44.839
I guess she wants she wants more secks or she

522
00:33:45.000 --> 00:33:48.200
wants more touching and stuff like she wants to be

523
00:33:48.880 --> 00:33:51.880
be to feel wanted. And I was just saying that

524
00:33:53.079 --> 00:33:58.960
that would help the insecurities that she has with him,

525
00:34:00.240 --> 00:34:03.519
because right now she feels like she isn't wanted and

526
00:34:03.599 --> 00:34:07.680
she's unsure like how he feels about her when it

527
00:34:07.799 --> 00:34:12.840
comes to the physical connection, right Because again this is

528
00:34:12.920 --> 00:34:16.519
also important, like you may have that emotional connection, which

529
00:34:16.599 --> 00:34:22.280
is great, but if the physical is lacking for someone again,

530
00:34:22.480 --> 00:34:26.039
that is something that needs to be expressed, something that

531
00:34:26.280 --> 00:34:27.239
she needs to.

532
00:34:29.280 --> 00:34:32.800
To talk about. Oh, I was trying to get rid

533
00:34:32.840 --> 00:34:34.400
of my message. I came up.

534
00:34:34.480 --> 00:34:45.000
But but yeah, I mean again communication right, but talking

535
00:34:45.119 --> 00:34:48.679
to him about it and telling him like this is

536
00:34:48.719 --> 00:34:52.239
how it feels. Again the like I brought up before

537
00:34:52.480 --> 00:34:58.199
about like just show tell me what support looks like.

538
00:34:58.440 --> 00:35:04.280
Show tell me what like you feeling sexually attractive looks like?

539
00:35:04.800 --> 00:35:06.719
What does that mean? What do I need to do?

540
00:35:10.159 --> 00:35:10.360
Yeah?

541
00:35:10.400 --> 00:35:15.920
I mean to be honest in my in my opinion,

542
00:35:16.920 --> 00:35:17.440
I think that.

543
00:35:21.280 --> 00:35:21.679
He needs.

544
00:35:21.760 --> 00:35:27.480
I feel that if he thinks that it's too much

545
00:35:27.519 --> 00:35:31.559
for him, then I mean he wants If he thinks

546
00:35:31.599 --> 00:35:33.199
it's too much for him, they need to have that

547
00:35:33.320 --> 00:35:36.320
conversation and then they need to figure out because she

548
00:35:36.639 --> 00:35:39.199
also she also says she doesn't want to cheat. It's

549
00:35:39.239 --> 00:35:41.840
not about it's not about orgasms. She's not looking for

550
00:35:42.000 --> 00:35:47.519
a porn stars. She wants him to smack her ass

551
00:35:47.559 --> 00:35:50.760
every once in a while. Her let her, let him,

552
00:35:51.920 --> 00:35:56.159
let him show her that she is wanted. And I

553
00:35:56.679 --> 00:36:01.360
think the biggest, the biggest thing with that is if

554
00:36:01.400 --> 00:36:05.000
a woman doesn't feel wanted, she doesn't feel loved, to

555
00:36:05.119 --> 00:36:07.159
feel cared for, us, don't feel protected, she don't feel

556
00:36:07.159 --> 00:36:11.400
anything right that that that's that's gonna be that that's

557
00:36:11.440 --> 00:36:12.920
a big, really big problem.

558
00:36:13.400 --> 00:36:16.639
Yeah, insecurities start popping up and ship like.

559
00:36:16.719 --> 00:36:19.079
What's going on? Why isn't it why doesn't she?

560
00:36:19.119 --> 00:36:22.159
You guys start thinking he's doing something with someone else,

561
00:36:22.400 --> 00:36:26.559
or she's not good enough, or like, you know, there's

562
00:36:26.599 --> 00:36:30.360
a million things that one can think of in their minds, uh,

563
00:36:31.280 --> 00:36:34.719
that are negative. We're so quick to go negative with

564
00:36:34.840 --> 00:36:40.119
everything too and not have a conversation because maybe he's

565
00:36:40.199 --> 00:36:44.880
just fucking stressed out. Maybe he didn't know, you know,

566
00:36:45.320 --> 00:36:48.840
maybe and at first when you were reading the email,

567
00:36:48.880 --> 00:36:50.920
I thought maybe she was going to say that she

568
00:36:51.079 --> 00:36:55.440
wanted to try more things or something or and it wasn't.

569
00:36:56.000 --> 00:36:59.199
But like, even with that too, that's a conversation at

570
00:36:59.280 --> 00:37:03.199
making a date night type thing or something to like

571
00:37:03.400 --> 00:37:03.960
try shit.

572
00:37:04.559 --> 00:37:06.840
And she said, she says she loves him, he's solid,

573
00:37:06.920 --> 00:37:09.960
he shows up in all in a lot of ways,

574
00:37:10.119 --> 00:37:13.400
but sexually she feels invisible. I mean, so the dude,

575
00:37:13.519 --> 00:37:16.000
the dude does, does what he has to do. It's

576
00:37:16.119 --> 00:37:17.519
just sexually he doesn't.

577
00:37:18.079 --> 00:37:22.079
Right, So again, the conversation that needs to be had

578
00:37:23.079 --> 00:37:27.679
between them has to be like her expressing what she wants,

579
00:37:27.880 --> 00:37:31.079
Like what is it that it's okay to say what

580
00:37:31.239 --> 00:37:35.000
you want? And at least that gives the other person

581
00:37:35.079 --> 00:37:38.280
an opportunity to be like, well I can do that

582
00:37:38.639 --> 00:37:40.800
or I don't know if I can do that, or

583
00:37:41.920 --> 00:37:44.280
how do I make that happen? So that's how you

584
00:37:44.559 --> 00:37:46.119
start having that conversation.

585
00:37:47.199 --> 00:37:50.000
But just being real, Right, So.

586
00:37:54.119 --> 00:37:58.320
She missed, she misses being touched without initiating. So I

587
00:37:58.400 --> 00:38:00.320
guess I guess she's at a set of point where

588
00:38:00.360 --> 00:38:05.960
it's like it's nothing's happening. Some has got to change,

589
00:38:06.480 --> 00:38:08.360
and if it doesn't, she's gonna pop off.

590
00:38:09.519 --> 00:38:10.480
So that.

591
00:38:21.320 --> 00:38:23.800
So does that does that mean? Does that mean that

592
00:38:25.079 --> 00:38:29.239
if if she, like say, for instance, nothing changes and

593
00:38:30.360 --> 00:38:32.280
the only thing that's gonna make the situation worse is

594
00:38:32.320 --> 00:38:34.119
if she goes out and gets it from somewhere else.

595
00:38:34.440 --> 00:38:38.239
I mean, why do that for that in the relationship?

596
00:38:38.440 --> 00:38:42.480
And I mean, like, this is the thing like if

597
00:38:42.519 --> 00:38:45.159
someone can't meet your needs and they don't want to

598
00:38:46.000 --> 00:38:47.159
or they don't want to be your.

599
00:38:47.079 --> 00:38:51.800
Needs, there's a difference between wanting to and can't can't.

600
00:38:51.840 --> 00:38:55.960
Right, So and again that's why they have to talk

601
00:38:56.000 --> 00:38:58.039
about it. But I don't think she's asking for a lot,

602
00:39:00.480 --> 00:39:02.960
come behind me, kiss my neck when I'm cooking, or

603
00:39:03.000 --> 00:39:05.480
something like just random ship.

604
00:39:05.440 --> 00:39:08.039
Always always eat the fucking cookie.

605
00:39:08.079 --> 00:39:08.199
Bro.

606
00:39:08.360 --> 00:39:12.519
The cookies are banging the cookies. You can't argue with that.

607
00:39:14.760 --> 00:39:15.519
Eat the cookies.

608
00:39:16.679 --> 00:39:21.760
The cookies surprise her sorright works.

609
00:39:21.559 --> 00:39:25.159
In they you know what? You know what's good on cookies?

610
00:39:26.480 --> 00:39:27.679
Every thick whipped cream.

611
00:39:28.559 --> 00:39:31.119
No, no dairy products. We just said this.

612
00:39:32.719 --> 00:39:36.079
Oh god, you're trying to give girls East infections out

613
00:39:36.079 --> 00:39:37.000
there with you.

614
00:39:38.840 --> 00:39:41.440
First of all, we're talking about cookies, yoe, what are

615
00:39:41.480 --> 00:39:47.599
you doing. You're talking about chocolate chip cookies, cookie balls.

616
00:39:49.239 --> 00:39:50.360
This sounds more like it.

617
00:39:52.280 --> 00:39:52.559
This is.

618
00:39:54.320 --> 00:39:59.559
Oh yeah, I'm so sure it is the tv m A.

619
00:40:01.360 --> 00:40:03.679
We stop being a family show when it started.

620
00:40:04.280 --> 00:40:08.559
Yeah, exactly, literally, Oh my god.

621
00:40:09.559 --> 00:40:13.239
Yeah. But you know, yeah, he's got he's got to

622
00:40:13.280 --> 00:40:16.400
step it up. Man, if, especially if he shows up

623
00:40:16.440 --> 00:40:18.800
in every other way but that he could step it up.

624
00:40:19.039 --> 00:40:20.599
There's no reason why he shouldn't.

625
00:40:21.840 --> 00:40:22.400
Who knows.

626
00:40:23.280 --> 00:40:25.320
I mean, what if it is a hormonal thing and

627
00:40:25.480 --> 00:40:28.800
he doesn't have the desire as much as she does.

628
00:40:30.199 --> 00:40:32.199
I mean to be, that's nothing a quick blue job

629
00:40:32.280 --> 00:40:32.800
can fect.

630
00:40:32.920 --> 00:40:40.920
Hey, the thing listen, the thing is too is that

631
00:40:41.719 --> 00:40:45.880
what what what if if it is like uh like

632
00:40:46.079 --> 00:40:50.320
uh he needs a carmonal Yeah, low testosterone can cause

633
00:40:51.599 --> 00:40:52.960
ed and ship like that, you know.

634
00:40:52.960 --> 00:40:53.360
What I mean?

635
00:40:54.280 --> 00:40:57.280
Or are they on medication of some kind that could

636
00:40:57.360 --> 00:41:00.760
also have effects, So she's the only one that knows

637
00:41:00.840 --> 00:41:01.480
the answer to that.

638
00:41:01.599 --> 00:41:05.239
But at least, you know, take those things into consideration.

639
00:41:05.400 --> 00:41:09.559
But I don't think this is a personal thing, Like,

640
00:41:10.119 --> 00:41:13.039
I don't think this is a like I don't want

641
00:41:13.119 --> 00:41:15.159
you type thing, because it does it doesn't sound like

642
00:41:15.239 --> 00:41:18.119
they don't ever have sex. It's just not happening as

643
00:41:18.280 --> 00:41:22.159
much as she likes to. But also she's not getting

644
00:41:22.280 --> 00:41:27.840
that attention that she wants from him, right absolutely, what

645
00:41:27.960 --> 00:41:29.400
are people sayings that can't read?

646
00:41:31.000 --> 00:41:34.199
This one says I'm back high?

647
00:41:36.119 --> 00:41:40.559
So is that dubbs? No, no, no, no, no, I

648
00:41:40.599 --> 00:41:42.119
don't even know what's going on out there.

649
00:41:42.639 --> 00:41:44.840
Yeah. This one says he might need to get his

650
00:41:44.920 --> 00:41:49.360
hytosterone check. I mean, hey, if it could be possible,

651
00:41:49.719 --> 00:41:50.960
could it could be possible.

652
00:41:51.559 --> 00:41:55.360
I'm actually, uh gonna set up an appointment to get

653
00:41:56.039 --> 00:42:03.599
my hormone levels checked to see what's going on, because yeah,

654
00:42:03.679 --> 00:42:06.559
this is what at my age, I'm just curious like

655
00:42:07.800 --> 00:42:11.599
how things hormonally, and I have PCOS. So it's kind

656
00:42:11.639 --> 00:42:17.800
of like a mess already. So I'm just curious, like like, also,

657
00:42:17.920 --> 00:42:20.480
I think it's good. Like we're talking. We've been talking

658
00:42:20.480 --> 00:42:22.480
about this, about going to the doctors to have like

659
00:42:22.840 --> 00:42:28.280
preventive care stuff and like making sure that you're getting

660
00:42:28.320 --> 00:42:30.719
blood work done and certain things done so that they

661
00:42:30.880 --> 00:42:36.039
do have something to like base off of later when

662
00:42:36.079 --> 00:42:38.639
there are problems and stuff like that. That's why it's

663
00:42:38.719 --> 00:42:44.079
important to do these things. So getting your hormone levels

664
00:42:44.159 --> 00:42:47.960
checked and blood worked on is actually important and something

665
00:42:48.079 --> 00:42:52.079
people should be doing with their doctor at least every year.

666
00:42:53.000 --> 00:42:55.960
God, I hope people know this. What are you doing?

667
00:42:58.320 --> 00:42:59.519
Tell that pussy to stop?

668
00:43:00.199 --> 00:43:01.079
Oh my lord?

669
00:43:03.400 --> 00:43:05.280
Just think they're just that break things.

670
00:43:07.480 --> 00:43:10.840
So the consensus is, smack the booty.

671
00:43:11.000 --> 00:43:14.000
More often, smack that booty more, don't.

672
00:43:13.920 --> 00:43:16.679
Don't use extra creamy whipped cream.

673
00:43:17.199 --> 00:43:18.880
I'm the cookie, don't you dare the cookie?

674
00:43:18.920 --> 00:43:23.400
Don't don't do it. Mm a ham sandwich might work better.

675
00:43:27.960 --> 00:43:30.360
There's no male, there's no Mayo.

676
00:43:33.440 --> 00:43:38.400
Ship. But yeah, so that that's that's the consensus, all right,

677
00:43:39.599 --> 00:43:47.360
So no Mayo man? Hold up? Does this bad?

678
00:43:48.199 --> 00:43:53.079
I apologize? You know, I like to apologize, you know,

679
00:43:53.880 --> 00:43:55.599
like I was doing longer. You gotta saw it, you know,

680
00:43:55.760 --> 00:43:59.599
like you know, likes gotta get done. My girl's uniform

681
00:43:59.639 --> 00:44:02.159
gotta get done. The baby's clothes gotta get done, you know,

682
00:44:02.360 --> 00:44:06.639
like laundry. Hey, hey, look, you know what and the

683
00:44:06.679 --> 00:44:08.840
thing is, laundry is twenty four hours in my buildings.

684
00:44:08.880 --> 00:44:11.760
Though, Oh that's gay, you know, like.

685
00:44:13.320 --> 00:44:15.239
Like like I don't know, you know what, like doing

686
00:44:15.320 --> 00:44:19.519
laundry is like like I love it for some reason.

687
00:44:19.559 --> 00:44:21.119
I don't know what it is. I just love it.

688
00:44:21.559 --> 00:44:30.039
I love it. You make money, don't get that, Coleon?

689
00:44:30.119 --> 00:44:31.039
What was we talking about?

690
00:44:31.079 --> 00:44:35.199
That washing folds? Yeah?

691
00:44:35.239 --> 00:44:36.559
But you know what though, like I'm like, like, you

692
00:44:36.639 --> 00:44:38.280
know what, I ain't gonna be washing the folks you

693
00:44:38.519 --> 00:44:39.159
all day long?

694
00:44:41.199 --> 00:44:46.519
People people, right, of course, eventually you hire people. You

695
00:44:46.639 --> 00:44:48.239
also don't have to stand the whole.

696
00:44:48.079 --> 00:44:52.000
Time, you know, of course, you know, Like, but see

697
00:44:53.559 --> 00:44:55.440
it's you know, what's something good happened to me Monday?

698
00:44:57.320 --> 00:44:59.719
I really cannot and you know, I really cannot. Collleon

699
00:44:59.800 --> 00:45:00.400
knows what it is.

700
00:45:00.880 --> 00:45:00.920
Like.

701
00:45:01.000 --> 00:45:03.000
At first, I was feeling different about it because it's

702
00:45:03.039 --> 00:45:07.079
really life changing, you know, like, and then I got

703
00:45:07.159 --> 00:45:09.280
scared because you know what, like I know, you know,

704
00:45:11.039 --> 00:45:13.440
like I feel like, you know, like this is how

705
00:45:13.519 --> 00:45:18.000
some people lose their humanity, you know, Like that's how

706
00:45:18.079 --> 00:45:20.679
life changing it is, and like to be grounded and

707
00:45:20.760 --> 00:45:22.559
like you know, and this is the reason why I

708
00:45:22.679 --> 00:45:26.760
was told pray more, you know, like and and I've

709
00:45:26.800 --> 00:45:29.079
been praying more, you know, like and that's the reason

710
00:45:29.119 --> 00:45:31.039
why like I you know, like when I was telling

711
00:45:31.119 --> 00:45:34.559
people shove their snow you know, sever their cars, right,

712
00:45:35.119 --> 00:45:37.159
and they will offer me money. I denied it because

713
00:45:37.199 --> 00:45:38.679
you know what, like what I'm doing from the bottom

714
00:45:38.679 --> 00:45:42.039
of the art up until you know, saying my back

715
00:45:42.159 --> 00:45:44.199
like locked in. Like when I said it locked in,

716
00:45:44.280 --> 00:45:48.440
I was like, oh, all right, you know so but

717
00:45:50.039 --> 00:45:53.760
I'm blessed man, you know, and and like you know

718
00:45:53.800 --> 00:45:55.719
what like but this but you know what, like with

719
00:45:55.840 --> 00:45:59.599
that blessing comes a lot more pressure, you know.

720
00:46:00.079 --> 00:46:07.800
And it's like, all right, too much silence?

721
00:46:09.039 --> 00:46:09.400
What was that?

722
00:46:10.079 --> 00:46:10.880
Too much silence?

723
00:46:11.800 --> 00:46:13.400
Ye, that's quiet. What happened.

724
00:46:15.559 --> 00:46:17.440
I was put in a position, you know, like I

725
00:46:17.519 --> 00:46:20.320
was catapulted to a position where like when I say

726
00:46:20.360 --> 00:46:23.719
it's life changing, I mean it's really life changing. And

727
00:46:26.239 --> 00:46:30.639
my fear is that you know, I'm like, you know,

728
00:46:30.760 --> 00:46:33.679
my fears that you know, like I may like not

729
00:46:33.800 --> 00:46:34.719
be humble no more.

730
00:46:35.559 --> 00:46:36.559
And it scares me.

731
00:46:36.599 --> 00:46:37.639
And that's the reason why I, like, you know, I

732
00:46:37.760 --> 00:46:41.679
be like basically crying all day because you know, I'm

733
00:46:41.960 --> 00:46:44.000
you know, like God brought me here and I came

734
00:46:44.079 --> 00:46:50.360
too far. You know, like I'm like, I'm feeling very

735
00:46:50.400 --> 00:46:55.480
indifferent about it. Mm hmmm, because you know what yo,

736
00:46:55.639 --> 00:47:02.400
like I was, I was rich before all this and

737
00:47:02.519 --> 00:47:10.400
I had nothing, Lady, g you there.

738
00:47:12.079 --> 00:47:14.239
I don't want to. I don't I don't want to.

739
00:47:14.760 --> 00:47:15.599
I don't want to lose.

740
00:47:15.639 --> 00:47:18.599
You know what I'm saying. I don't want to lose.

741
00:47:18.599 --> 00:47:21.239
You know what I'm saying, like like who I am?

742
00:47:22.320 --> 00:47:24.280
And it's very easy to get lost out here.

743
00:47:26.039 --> 00:47:26.440
Mm hmm.

744
00:47:27.519 --> 00:47:30.440
You know, like it's very it's extremely easy to get

745
00:47:30.519 --> 00:47:31.079
lost out here.

746
00:47:32.639 --> 00:47:33.119
Grounded.

747
00:47:33.840 --> 00:47:35.360
That's the thing I was gonna tell.

748
00:47:37.320 --> 00:47:38.920
First and foremost. God keeps me grounded.

749
00:47:38.920 --> 00:47:42.320
That everybody else follows every All my loved ones follow,

750
00:47:43.639 --> 00:47:47.920
you know, all my loved ones follow, you know, like.

751
00:47:49.480 --> 00:47:52.440
From my daughter and my granddaughter. My daughter is you know,

752
00:47:53.519 --> 00:47:55.679
everybody you know.

753
00:47:56.960 --> 00:47:58.639
That's why I was telling you. I was telling I

754
00:47:58.800 --> 00:48:01.199
was telling you that I know how I know how

755
00:48:01.280 --> 00:48:04.400
you feel, and no one, no one in your life

756
00:48:04.440 --> 00:48:06.440
that's close to you and cares about you, is gonna

757
00:48:06.519 --> 00:48:07.239
let you ride like that.

758
00:48:07.400 --> 00:48:07.519
Bro.

759
00:48:08.719 --> 00:48:11.039
You know what I'm saying, it's it's not gonna happen.

760
00:48:12.159 --> 00:48:15.519
You know, you know, like it's like you know, you know,

761
00:48:15.639 --> 00:48:17.880
like other people, you know what I'm saying, they'll look

762
00:48:17.920 --> 00:48:20.679
at it from a number's perspective and be like, what

763
00:48:20.800 --> 00:48:25.199
you bitching about? You know, like I'm looking at it

764
00:48:25.320 --> 00:48:29.320
from you know, a different you know what I'm saying,

765
00:48:29.519 --> 00:48:33.559
a different view, a different lens. You know, like if

766
00:48:33.760 --> 00:48:35.840
you know what, if this, if this situation happened to

767
00:48:35.880 --> 00:48:38.840
me ten years ago, I can almost guarantee you you

768
00:48:38.880 --> 00:48:40.039
know what I'm saying, I would have over you know,

769
00:48:40.159 --> 00:48:42.280
like I would have been done like three weeks later

770
00:48:43.159 --> 00:48:48.239
over those from some hockers on the bed. And I'm

771
00:48:48.280 --> 00:48:51.639
being serious about that because like I was so reckless

772
00:48:51.679 --> 00:48:52.800
about life, you know what I'm saying, Like.

773
00:48:54.000 --> 00:48:56.679
Yeah, but I think you don't give yourself enough credit

774
00:48:57.039 --> 00:49:02.280
for who you are now. Like if you continue to

775
00:49:03.760 --> 00:49:07.159
think like you're gonna fail, then that's what you're gonna do.

776
00:49:07.800 --> 00:49:11.239
If you continue to think like that something's gonna change

777
00:49:11.320 --> 00:49:14.119
me in this way, in a negative way, that's what's

778
00:49:14.199 --> 00:49:17.719
gonna happen. So I feel like you need to change.

779
00:49:18.960 --> 00:49:20.079
The way you're talking.

780
00:49:20.320 --> 00:49:23.800
Yeah, you know, like, yeah, you're absolutely right, You're absolutely right.

781
00:49:24.079 --> 00:49:26.480
It's just that, you know, of.

782
00:49:26.519 --> 00:49:30.039
Course, the fear is there. There's always gonna be a

783
00:49:30.159 --> 00:49:30.880
fear there.

784
00:49:33.519 --> 00:49:35.159
And look, you know what, I'm not scared of the

785
00:49:35.239 --> 00:49:38.559
crime camera, you know, because like it's a real emotion,

786
00:49:38.679 --> 00:49:41.119
man like. And the reason why I say is because

787
00:49:41.840 --> 00:49:43.360
I used to be like, yo, you know what crime is.

788
00:49:43.480 --> 00:49:47.039
You know what I'm saying, it's feminine, na man, you know,

789
00:49:47.199 --> 00:49:50.039
like I'm like like, you know, like like look, you

790
00:49:50.079 --> 00:49:52.079
know what, like I said, you know what, like people

791
00:49:52.239 --> 00:49:54.679
look at it from a numbers perspective, right, you know,

792
00:49:55.880 --> 00:50:00.199
and they'll be like, what are you complaining about? You know,

793
00:50:00.360 --> 00:50:05.039
like you got X, Y and Z and whatnot. You know,

794
00:50:05.960 --> 00:50:08.400
if you don't want, I'll take it, you know. But

795
00:50:08.519 --> 00:50:11.159
like what they don't understand is that I still got

796
00:50:11.280 --> 00:50:14.280
to suffer. I you know what I'm saying, I suffered

797
00:50:14.360 --> 00:50:17.880
before it. I'm suffering right now in pain. I'm suff

798
00:50:17.880 --> 00:50:19.079
related in life.

799
00:50:19.719 --> 00:50:24.639
I think I think I'm missing something, Like what are

800
00:50:24.679 --> 00:50:26.000
you talking about, dubs?

801
00:50:28.119 --> 00:50:30.519
Like did something happen?

802
00:50:32.239 --> 00:50:36.239
Something good happened? Like right, something good? You know what

803
00:50:37.639 --> 00:50:41.039
something good happened, right, It's just that I feel, you

804
00:50:41.039 --> 00:50:44.320
know what I'm saying, I feel indifferent about it, Okay,

805
00:50:44.480 --> 00:50:45.320
And that's okay.

806
00:50:46.639 --> 00:50:48.400
Because because you know what in know realness, you know

807
00:50:48.440 --> 00:50:51.360
what I'm saying, Like when when you're struggling, You know

808
00:50:51.400 --> 00:50:53.239
what I'm saying, Like when you struggle so much because

809
00:50:53.679 --> 00:50:56.199
you know, like financially, it gets to the point where,

810
00:50:56.280 --> 00:50:59.320
like you know, it could either like you know, make

811
00:50:59.400 --> 00:51:03.239
you desperate or it can either humble you. Right, And

812
00:51:03.400 --> 00:51:05.559
God brought me to a point where I'm humbled enough

813
00:51:05.639 --> 00:51:07.280
to the point where I look at you know where

814
00:51:07.320 --> 00:51:11.440
I'm like, Yo, financially, financially, I was broke, but people

815
00:51:11.599 --> 00:51:11.920
love me.

816
00:51:12.599 --> 00:51:14.280
God loves me, so that makes me rich.

817
00:51:15.239 --> 00:51:19.960
Yes, right, So let me tell you something doves okay,

818
00:51:20.360 --> 00:51:21.559
And I think I get it now.

819
00:51:21.679 --> 00:51:22.440
I think I get it.

820
00:51:26.960 --> 00:51:27.519
First of all.

821
00:51:28.000 --> 00:51:30.639
And I know where you don't talk about religion or

822
00:51:31.000 --> 00:51:34.519
politics and stuff, but I think I have to say this.

823
00:51:37.760 --> 00:51:44.320
You have these good things that happen, right, It's for

824
00:51:44.440 --> 00:51:44.920
a reason.

825
00:51:45.800 --> 00:51:46.920
You were given a purpose.

826
00:51:47.840 --> 00:51:49.519
You know what you do with that?

827
00:51:49.719 --> 00:51:51.639
God has given us free will. What you do with

828
00:51:51.800 --> 00:51:53.360
that is up to you.

829
00:51:54.079 --> 00:51:59.800
Okay, But don't you dare start feeling like an imposter

830
00:52:01.320 --> 00:52:05.960
because you still have you still have an opportunity. Okay,

831
00:52:08.320 --> 00:52:11.559
Sometimes the answer is yes, sometimes it's no, sometimes it's

832
00:52:11.639 --> 00:52:12.039
not yet.

833
00:52:13.000 --> 00:52:15.440
So you have to understand that what.

834
00:52:16.039 --> 00:52:20.280
Is going on in your life right now, you have

835
00:52:20.400 --> 00:52:23.960
to find the meaning in it. You have to decide

836
00:52:24.559 --> 00:52:27.719
what can I do with this that's gonna help me

837
00:52:27.960 --> 00:52:36.280
feel like I'm serving a purpose? Right It doesn't matter

838
00:52:36.360 --> 00:52:40.800
the why, Okay, doesn't matter why this happened? Why now?

839
00:52:41.719 --> 00:52:44.920
Why you're in pain every day? It's what are we

840
00:52:45.000 --> 00:52:46.719
gonna do about it? Because it's happened.

841
00:52:46.880 --> 00:52:50.679
It's happened, and nobody can tell you how to feel

842
00:52:50.719 --> 00:52:53.119
about it. They can't tell you to be happy, they

843
00:52:53.159 --> 00:52:55.599
can't tell you to be sad, because they're not the

844
00:52:55.679 --> 00:52:59.079
one going through it. With great responsibility. With great power

845
00:52:59.199 --> 00:53:02.199
comes great respondibility. So now you're gonna have a whole

846
00:53:02.239 --> 00:53:08.000
different set of problems. Okay, But you're you're the one

847
00:53:08.079 --> 00:53:11.920
that decides. Like you said, you've been praying about it.

848
00:53:12.039 --> 00:53:16.440
You've been doing all this. So now listen in the silence.

849
00:53:16.880 --> 00:53:20.679
I want you to hear hear his voice, hear his guidance.

850
00:53:21.599 --> 00:53:26.360
There is a purpose. Okay, So now you have to

851
00:53:26.480 --> 00:53:30.760
decide what part do I need? What part does my

852
00:53:30.920 --> 00:53:34.559
family need? And what part is he asking me to do?

853
00:53:35.480 --> 00:53:37.840
How can I be a blessing to others? How can

854
00:53:37.920 --> 00:53:38.440
I serve?

855
00:53:39.119 --> 00:53:39.320
How?

856
00:53:40.039 --> 00:53:41.599
How can I be a good example?

857
00:53:42.239 --> 00:53:47.679
Right? He doesn't give any problems to people who he

858
00:53:47.760 --> 00:53:50.239
doesn't know can handle them exactly.

859
00:53:50.639 --> 00:53:53.920
But see, but see now, now here's another thing, and

860
00:53:54.039 --> 00:53:56.679
colder I can tell you. You know, I could be

861
00:53:56.760 --> 00:54:00.360
you know, like doing whatever you know, like helping people

862
00:54:00.400 --> 00:54:04.039
out and whatnot. And I always feel like it's never enough,

863
00:54:04.599 --> 00:54:07.159
Like especially when it comes to my parents, I always

864
00:54:07.159 --> 00:54:08.480
feel like it's never enough.

865
00:54:09.840 --> 00:54:12.880
But guess what, there is no price that you could

866
00:54:12.920 --> 00:54:19.199
pay that will ever, will ever suffice. Okay, but you

867
00:54:19.360 --> 00:54:23.000
have to be happy with what you can do, because

868
00:54:23.039 --> 00:54:26.440
the thing is we were we worry so much that

869
00:54:26.599 --> 00:54:29.800
we're not doing enough, that we're not doing enough. Guess

870
00:54:29.840 --> 00:54:32.760
what if you don't take care of you and something

871
00:54:32.880 --> 00:54:35.559
happens to you, ain't nobody gonna be there to take

872
00:54:35.639 --> 00:54:37.519
care of those people that you want to take care of.

873
00:54:38.119 --> 00:54:40.840
I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Yeah, I'm sorry, dubs.

874
00:54:41.440 --> 00:54:44.519
No matter how much you give will never be enough

875
00:54:44.800 --> 00:54:46.760
because you know, and again I know we don't do

876
00:54:46.840 --> 00:54:51.719
into religion, but he gave his only son for your life.

877
00:54:51.960 --> 00:54:55.800
Absolutely right, You're absolutely right, you know right, and and

878
00:54:55.960 --> 00:54:58.960
and see and see like you know, like like like

879
00:54:59.000 --> 00:55:00.559
I'm sorry to bring it up because like it's like,

880
00:55:00.639 --> 00:55:01.920
you know, like it's been heavy.

881
00:55:01.679 --> 00:55:02.599
On my mind ever since.

882
00:55:02.719 --> 00:55:03.360
I bet it has.

883
00:55:03.519 --> 00:55:05.679
I bet it has, you know, like and and and

884
00:55:05.840 --> 00:55:07.639
like and like you know what, like we're you know

885
00:55:07.679 --> 00:55:09.960
what I'm saying, Like I don't even want to sound ungrateful,

886
00:55:10.039 --> 00:55:13.119
And that's the problem because you know what I'm like, damn,

887
00:55:13.119 --> 00:55:14.679
you know, like should I be feeling this way?

888
00:55:15.159 --> 00:55:19.320
You know I should be? You know like that absolutely.

889
00:55:19.079 --> 00:55:25.760
Absolutely Again, there are people in this world that would

890
00:55:25.920 --> 00:55:32.039
never receive such a gift in three lifetimes. Okay, how

891
00:55:32.159 --> 00:55:37.840
you feel is okay because that's your feeling. This is

892
00:55:37.960 --> 00:55:41.840
something that has changed your entire life, and how you

893
00:55:42.039 --> 00:55:46.880
feel is totally fine. But you are the only one

894
00:55:47.000 --> 00:55:50.519
who can process through that. You are the only one

895
00:55:50.639 --> 00:55:53.079
who can decide, because that's what it's gonna be. It's

896
00:55:53.119 --> 00:55:56.119
gonna be a decision. Am I going to keep trying

897
00:55:56.159 --> 00:56:00.199
to kill myself feeling like I can do more? We

898
00:56:00.400 --> 00:56:03.679
can always do more, But that's not the point. The

899
00:56:03.800 --> 00:56:07.679
point is you have to make the best laid plans.

900
00:56:07.719 --> 00:56:10.440
You got to plan accordingly. But as far as your feelings,

901
00:56:10.639 --> 00:56:14.440
all you can do is continue to pray, continue.

902
00:56:14.039 --> 00:56:17.039
To talk to people that you trust, and roll with it.

903
00:56:17.760 --> 00:56:20.079
Yeah, and realize that how, let me tell you something,

904
00:56:20.119 --> 00:56:25.719
how you feel right now is not uncommon, you know what,

905
00:56:26.119 --> 00:56:26.679
you know.

906
00:56:26.719 --> 00:56:30.480
What because like because like you know what, like there's guilt,

907
00:56:30.559 --> 00:56:33.320
there's all kinds of stuff, you know, like like like

908
00:56:33.679 --> 00:56:35.519
like you know, like Corleon was talking to me, you know,

909
00:56:36.239 --> 00:56:39.280
and like you know, I was asking them whatever like

910
00:56:39.639 --> 00:56:40.880
like it's like, you know what I'm saying, Like I

911
00:56:41.000 --> 00:56:45.000
have to ask them, like because and the reason why

912
00:56:45.039 --> 00:56:47.880
I ask is because of this specific reason right right.

913
00:56:48.679 --> 00:56:48.880
You know.

914
00:56:50.360 --> 00:56:52.440
People you know, like people being putting out, you know,

915
00:56:52.519 --> 00:56:54.880
like in my situation, you know, like they'll look at

916
00:56:54.920 --> 00:56:59.159
the you know, you know, like they'll look at the

917
00:56:59.559 --> 00:57:01.239
at the you know what I'm saying, they'll look at

918
00:57:01.239 --> 00:57:04.239
the cover of the book. They won't you know what

919
00:57:04.280 --> 00:57:06.840
I'm saying, read a chapter. You see what I'm saying, Yeah,

920
00:57:06.920 --> 00:57:08.719
if that makes sense, Like like you know, they'll look

921
00:57:08.760 --> 00:57:10.559
at the cover and just be like, man, you should

922
00:57:10.599 --> 00:57:12.360
be happy, you know, but.

923
00:57:12.440 --> 00:57:15.719
Guess what, nobody else has to deal with it. Nobody

924
00:57:15.760 --> 00:57:16.280
else has.

925
00:57:16.199 --> 00:57:16.719
To deal with it.

926
00:57:16.800 --> 00:57:20.199
But you see, but see, like now I'm gonna say

927
00:57:20.239 --> 00:57:23.320
something that's gonna sound ridiculous. It's gonna sound silly, but

928
00:57:23.519 --> 00:57:26.199
like when you're you know, like for five for five years,

929
00:57:26.239 --> 00:57:28.199
I was, you know, I've been struggling for five years,

930
00:57:28.239 --> 00:57:29.199
like after my accident.

931
00:57:30.000 --> 00:57:33.960
No, but but in those five years, you know, I

932
00:57:34.039 --> 00:57:34.719
went from.

933
00:57:36.079 --> 00:57:39.000
Like drinking and all that stuff to like actually going

934
00:57:39.000 --> 00:57:40.920
to church on some days, you know, like I went

935
00:57:40.960 --> 00:57:42.760
from that to like I have a family, you know,

936
00:57:43.400 --> 00:57:45.119
Like like you know, in those five years, you know what,

937
00:57:45.280 --> 00:57:48.360
I have plans. God has plans. If you want to

938
00:57:48.400 --> 00:57:50.800
make God laugh, go ahead and make plans, you know,

939
00:57:50.960 --> 00:57:52.280
like I was supposed to be out.

940
00:57:52.519 --> 00:57:55.119
But do you see, but do you see, Dubs, all

941
00:57:55.239 --> 00:57:57.960
that you're talking about right now, the testimony you have

942
00:57:58.159 --> 00:58:00.599
right now. You can't have a testimon on you without

943
00:58:00.599 --> 00:58:07.639
the test right. So now you've been Wow, yeah, you've

944
00:58:07.679 --> 00:58:10.719
been put through the fire. Okay, he's been your fourth

945
00:58:10.800 --> 00:58:14.119
man in the fire. Now he has given you all

946
00:58:14.280 --> 00:58:18.320
that you could ever ask or deserve, more than you

947
00:58:18.400 --> 00:58:21.360
could ever hold. Okay, so stop looking at it in

948
00:58:21.440 --> 00:58:25.440
the mouth and slapping it and decide, Look at where

949
00:58:25.519 --> 00:58:28.400
you brought me from, Look where you have me.

950
00:58:29.679 --> 00:58:31.920
Now what do you want me to do with it?

951
00:58:33.719 --> 00:58:37.119
And it doesn't mean you know, it doesn't even require

952
00:58:37.280 --> 00:58:40.280
other people, none of that stuff. It's you.

953
00:58:40.679 --> 00:58:43.840
It's you and your family, the people who live in

954
00:58:43.920 --> 00:58:48.239
your home, who have been there through thick thin, you know, good, bad,

955
00:58:48.440 --> 00:58:48.800
all of that.

956
00:58:49.159 --> 00:58:53.360
You have to decide, now what am I going to do?

957
00:58:54.079 --> 00:58:58.800
What it's okay that you feel because right now you're

958
00:58:58.880 --> 00:59:02.760
in transition, You are in transition from one place to

959
00:59:02.840 --> 00:59:03.159
the other.

960
00:59:05.480 --> 00:59:07.360
And I'm gonna say something real quick, you know, like

961
00:59:08.000 --> 00:59:11.400
it's almost as if you know, you know, I'm I'm

962
00:59:11.440 --> 00:59:13.440
you know what I mean. I'm gonna use this as

963
00:59:13.480 --> 00:59:17.360
an example, like you know, the people that get Stockholm syndrome, right,

964
00:59:18.400 --> 00:59:20.400
I'm like I was so used to struggling, you know,

965
00:59:20.519 --> 00:59:22.639
Like I also used to rhymen, noodles and stuff.

966
00:59:22.639 --> 00:59:24.440
You know, Like I'm looking back at them, like I

967
00:59:24.480 --> 00:59:27.559
don't want to leave now, And you don't have to.

968
00:59:28.519 --> 00:59:29.760
That's the beautiful thing.

969
00:59:29.880 --> 00:59:33.840
You don't have to do. You can elevate the ram

970
00:59:33.960 --> 00:59:40.800
and baby dents, you know.

971
00:59:41.239 --> 00:59:44.039
But but like but like you know, what.

972
00:59:44.159 --> 00:59:46.280
I just wanted to make sure that you know that,

973
00:59:46.440 --> 00:59:49.280
you know, like I think I wasn't being ungrateful because

974
00:59:49.280 --> 00:59:50.480
you know what, I don't want to spend you know,

975
00:59:50.960 --> 00:59:52.400
spinning my blessings and whatnot.

976
00:59:52.960 --> 00:59:54.679
You know, just like you know, this is a lot

977
00:59:54.760 --> 00:59:55.039
going on.

978
00:59:55.239 --> 01:00:00.159
However you go this this guilty yeah, because the you know,

979
01:00:00.440 --> 01:00:05.440
but I said it is, nothing has to change.

980
01:00:07.360 --> 01:00:12.719
However, right, nothing has off subject real quick. I went

981
01:00:12.760 --> 01:00:15.199
to the v A last week and I weighed in

982
01:00:15.280 --> 01:00:19.840
that two ninety four. I lost one hundred pounds. Wow, year,

983
01:00:20.800 --> 01:00:23.159
you know, and I think, you know, I thank God

984
01:00:23.239 --> 01:00:28.239
for that, and and and another thing too, like I

985
01:00:28.320 --> 01:00:32.039
hit a milestone. You know, so like five years ago,

986
01:00:32.199 --> 01:00:35.400
I got a rested for the UY. Right, this is

987
01:00:35.639 --> 01:00:37.519
this is where it starts, you know, Like I got

988
01:00:37.599 --> 01:00:38.559
a wrestle for the UY.

989
01:00:38.679 --> 01:00:38.800
Right.

990
01:00:40.960 --> 01:00:42.639
If the cops were smart enough, you know, they could

991
01:00:42.679 --> 01:00:44.599
have hit me with a drug charge. But they didn't

992
01:00:44.719 --> 01:00:47.679
catch without you know the other thing I had. That's

993
01:00:47.719 --> 01:00:51.880
when you know, the well my parents had to come

994
01:00:51.920 --> 01:00:57.840
to the police department and pick me up. Right, that's

995
01:00:57.880 --> 01:00:59.639
when like the guilt really hit. And that was the

996
01:00:59.719 --> 01:01:02.159
first time I've ever felt so guilty. Get and arrested.

997
01:01:02.480 --> 01:01:04.719
And I started looking back, like, bro, you've been getting

998
01:01:04.800 --> 01:01:06.639
arrested since like you're fourteen years old.

999
01:01:07.679 --> 01:01:09.840
It's like, what we're doing. What we're gonna be in

1000
01:01:09.880 --> 01:01:13.480
handcuffs like every decade or something, you know. So it

1001
01:01:13.599 --> 01:01:17.119
was like right then and there, I'm like, what's the problem.

1002
01:01:17.760 --> 01:01:20.480
Drinking is definitely the problem because it opens it opens

1003
01:01:20.519 --> 01:01:25.920
doors for other things. Five years later, I'm so so,

1004
01:01:27.239 --> 01:01:30.360
you know, I thank God for that because you know what,

1005
01:01:31.440 --> 01:01:32.880
and I think, you know, you know what, and I'm

1006
01:01:32.880 --> 01:01:35.000
glad I got that. I'm so glad I got that,

1007
01:01:35.119 --> 01:01:38.400
the uy because if I didn't, next time I would

1008
01:01:38.400 --> 01:01:40.119
be drinking the driving. I would have wiped out a family.

1009
01:01:40.199 --> 01:01:40.519
I know that.

1010
01:01:41.400 --> 01:01:47.400
Yeah, you know so I saw bottom, yeah, in the

1011
01:01:47.599 --> 01:01:49.639
in the best way, and you know what.

1012
01:01:49.719 --> 01:01:52.559
And I'm thankful for coleone man because like, you know,

1013
01:01:54.119 --> 01:01:56.639
that's you know what, that's my brother right there, you know.

1014
01:01:57.760 --> 01:01:59.559
And I'm thankful for like you know, like for a

1015
01:01:59.599 --> 01:02:02.199
lot of other people too, and you know, and thankful

1016
01:02:02.199 --> 01:02:04.719
for the podcast. I'm just thankful for everything. Yeah, I'm

1017
01:02:04.719 --> 01:02:08.119
going to trans you know, a transitional thing in my life. However,

1018
01:02:08.599 --> 01:02:10.960
you know, you're gonna get up one day, all of

1019
01:02:11.079 --> 01:02:12.159
us we're going to casino.

1020
01:02:13.559 --> 01:02:15.559
Oh Jesus, you.

1021
01:02:15.599 --> 01:02:19.159
Know, and then you know what I'm saying, it's gonna

1022
01:02:19.159 --> 01:02:20.039
be oce is fourteen.

1023
01:02:22.800 --> 01:02:23.280
I'm down.

1024
01:02:26.119 --> 01:02:28.199
But yeah, but but you know what, but yo, I

1025
01:02:28.280 --> 01:02:31.199
apologize for taking up the time, but you know it's

1026
01:02:31.239 --> 01:02:34.079
been a while. I love you guys. I'm doing laundry.

1027
01:02:35.119 --> 01:02:41.159
Yeah, laundry came like this whole thing. But that's okay,

1028
01:02:41.360 --> 01:02:44.239
Like that's what you were feeling. It needed to come out,

1029
01:02:44.360 --> 01:02:48.519
and that's fine. But I think like, like we we

1030
01:02:49.039 --> 01:02:55.280
humans tend to resist a lot of guilt on things

1031
01:02:55.360 --> 01:02:57.440
that we did in the past that we're not like

1032
01:02:57.920 --> 01:03:02.599
proud of, especially when it comes to parents. And I

1033
01:03:02.800 --> 01:03:07.719
just want you to know that, like, like I don't

1034
01:03:07.719 --> 01:03:10.559
know how to say this right, but like there's no

1035
01:03:10.679 --> 01:03:13.639
way to repay it. It's just the way you repay

1036
01:03:13.679 --> 01:03:15.519
it is to keep doing what you're doing. Does that

1037
01:03:15.639 --> 01:03:16.159
make sense?

1038
01:03:16.280 --> 01:03:19.039
Like to keep moving forward, keep.

1039
01:03:18.920 --> 01:03:22.960
Moving forward the way you're doing and providing and doing

1040
01:03:23.039 --> 01:03:25.880
what you need to do for your family and your kids.

1041
01:03:26.480 --> 01:03:29.960
So I think that like you need to kind of

1042
01:03:30.079 --> 01:03:34.280
like let go of what you did. It happened.

1043
01:03:34.800 --> 01:03:38.719
You can't change it. You're fucked up, but you're not

1044
01:03:38.920 --> 01:03:42.320
still fucked up, and that means more than anything. So

1045
01:03:42.480 --> 01:03:47.719
I think that you need to just move forward with

1046
01:03:47.880 --> 01:03:52.400
your best foot forward and think about what do you

1047
01:03:52.480 --> 01:03:54.519
want to leave behind. What's going to be your legacy.

1048
01:03:55.000 --> 01:03:57.079
You know, you have kids, so.

1049
01:03:57.400 --> 01:03:59.760
That's what should be at the forefront of your mind.

1050
01:04:00.519 --> 01:04:04.239
And I have a granddaughter and and your grandchildren because

1051
01:04:04.239 --> 01:04:09.760
you may have more eventually because look at his twelve grandchildren.

1052
01:04:10.239 --> 01:04:11.239
So like you.

1053
01:04:17.039 --> 01:04:19.719
But I mean, I think it's very normal to feel

1054
01:04:19.880 --> 01:04:23.559
all the things that you're feeling, like we are agreeing,

1055
01:04:23.760 --> 01:04:27.159
because yeah, and it's a lot. But I think that

1056
01:04:27.400 --> 01:04:32.239
you have to trust yourself more like you, You've got

1057
01:04:32.360 --> 01:04:37.039
to prove into yourself that you can do ship when

1058
01:04:37.119 --> 01:04:37.639
you want to.

1059
01:04:39.039 --> 01:04:44.119
So, you know what, you know what, you guys are

1060
01:04:44.159 --> 01:04:44.800
absolutely right.

1061
01:04:44.880 --> 01:04:47.559
And I'm glad, we know, we know you know, Like

1062
01:04:48.079 --> 01:04:50.960
you know, I'm glad I shared with the group, come

1063
01:04:51.039 --> 01:04:52.960
on with the group.

1064
01:04:58.519 --> 01:05:02.760
Feeding it to it went from not getting enough sex

1065
01:05:02.920 --> 01:05:06.480
to transform transformation.

1066
01:05:07.679 --> 01:05:10.280
Hey, look, you know what, you know what, I ain't

1067
01:05:10.320 --> 01:05:12.000
gonna lie, you know, like at my age, you know,

1068
01:05:12.880 --> 01:05:17.400
like stress, you know what I'm saying, like anything that Yeah,

1069
01:05:18.719 --> 01:05:20.800
and you know what, another thing too, and I'm gonna

1070
01:05:20.840 --> 01:05:22.480
keep it a buck like I'm gonna keep it real,

1071
01:05:22.920 --> 01:05:25.320
like my spinal cord injury, right like sometimes like you know,

1072
01:05:26.679 --> 01:05:28.440
like you know, like I got I got damaged nerves

1073
01:05:28.480 --> 01:05:28.880
and whatnot.

1074
01:05:29.039 --> 01:05:29.800
Like sometimes you.

1075
01:05:29.840 --> 01:05:30.079
Know, like.

1076
01:05:33.079 --> 01:05:39.480
Don't do it, don't do it, don't do it.

1077
01:05:41.679 --> 01:05:44.920
I just don't understand how I'm unemployed, but my still works.

1078
01:05:48.519 --> 01:05:49.639
That's when it works better.

1079
01:05:49.880 --> 01:05:51.800
I've heard, I've heard it works better.

1080
01:05:53.800 --> 01:05:56.239
Know what you ain't lying?

1081
01:06:00.239 --> 01:06:03.079
She goes into production.

1082
01:06:03.960 --> 01:06:04.800
People come here.

1083
01:06:04.920 --> 01:06:07.440
You know, people ain't got no job, they ain't got

1084
01:06:07.519 --> 01:06:08.800
no card, ain't got nothing, but.

1085
01:06:08.840 --> 01:06:16.039
They got a hell of kids. What do they say? Hey,

1086
01:06:16.920 --> 01:06:19.079
how hell you need a boy? How me? As you

1087
01:06:19.119 --> 01:06:23.679
can see, I can't miss like like, hey, come here, mama,

1088
01:06:23.840 --> 01:06:28.840
let me give me your taxes. Baby have a baby?

1089
01:06:33.559 --> 01:06:34.280
Would say that.

1090
01:06:37.079 --> 01:06:38.679
Because a new.

1091
01:06:38.599 --> 01:06:41.559
Thing that was passed today where if you get the

1092
01:06:41.719 --> 01:06:46.079
child the child tax credit, you don't get that money

1093
01:06:46.159 --> 01:06:49.639
in your refund. It has to go into a bank account.

1094
01:06:50.320 --> 01:06:52.639
Oh wow, for the child.

1095
01:06:52.920 --> 01:06:55.840
I found that where I could not believe it.

1096
01:06:56.639 --> 01:06:59.559
You know, forget about the child's well being while they're living.

1097
01:07:00.119 --> 01:07:03.440
Thanks you you know what, like you you know what like.

1098
01:07:05.800 --> 01:07:08.119
Like regardless, you know, like regardless of like you know,

1099
01:07:08.239 --> 01:07:10.719
like I had problems with like my kids mother's you know,

1100
01:07:10.880 --> 01:07:12.280
some of it was like you know what I'm saying,

1101
01:07:12.440 --> 01:07:13.960
self inflicted, right.

1102
01:07:14.360 --> 01:07:16.360
I always made sure that, you know, my kids were

1103
01:07:16.400 --> 01:07:19.599
good always, you know, daddy.

1104
01:07:21.199 --> 01:07:25.199
Yeah, but you know, you know, like like like I said,

1105
01:07:25.199 --> 01:07:27.119
you know what, like certain things could have been avoided

1106
01:07:27.159 --> 01:07:29.239
back then, but I was hard headed, you know.

1107
01:07:29.360 --> 01:07:31.039
So it's a different time, bro.

1108
01:07:31.719 --> 01:07:34.800
You know, my head was like R two D too

1109
01:07:34.960 --> 01:07:38.760
hard headed, you know. So now I was like, you know,

1110
01:07:38.920 --> 01:07:43.360
like like my vision is like a lot clearer and whatnot, and.

1111
01:07:45.440 --> 01:07:47.639
It is that's good, you know what.

1112
01:07:47.960 --> 01:07:49.719
Like I'm just basking in the moment being with you

1113
01:07:49.800 --> 01:07:51.760
guys on here because I missed a couple of weeks

1114
01:07:52.280 --> 01:07:54.480
you know, like it was too cold to come outside

1115
01:07:54.519 --> 01:07:55.159
to the office.

1116
01:07:55.519 --> 01:07:56.239
I wasn't gonna.

1117
01:08:00.079 --> 01:08:04.000
So so it's like seventeen degrees and ship, don't blame you.

1118
01:08:04.320 --> 01:08:06.440
Like that was crazy, no.

1119
01:08:06.800 --> 01:08:09.679
Yo, that yo. The Hudson River like literally froze over.

1120
01:08:10.280 --> 01:08:14.440
I saw videos of that ship. That's crazy. Or the ocean.

1121
01:08:14.559 --> 01:08:17.920
Did you see like down the shore before this wizard,

1122
01:08:18.600 --> 01:08:22.359
how people were like ice skating on the beach because

1123
01:08:22.439 --> 01:08:23.159
the from the.

1124
01:08:23.279 --> 01:08:28.199
Water coming you know on the they're crazy. I would

1125
01:08:28.279 --> 01:08:30.239
never that's moving water underneath.

1126
01:08:30.359 --> 01:08:33.520
No thanks, Oh my bad, my bad, go ahead, continue my.

1127
01:08:36.560 --> 01:08:39.279
No, but I was what I was gonna say, was

1128
01:08:40.319 --> 01:08:46.279
that before the final thought next episode, which would will

1129
01:08:46.359 --> 01:08:51.920
which will be March eleventh. It's a day before my birthday.

1130
01:08:53.000 --> 01:08:54.159
We should just do it on your birthday.

1131
01:08:54.199 --> 01:08:56.800
Done, So now it's gonna it's gonna have to be that.

1132
01:08:56.960 --> 01:08:58.199
It's gonna have to be on the eleventh.

1133
01:08:58.279 --> 01:08:59.840
Why are you trying to ruin his birthday?

1134
01:09:02.760 --> 01:09:08.000
So so Wednesday, Wednesday the eleventh, we're gonna, we're gonna,

1135
01:09:08.039 --> 01:09:10.760
we're gonna have I gonna do a show. It's gonna

1136
01:09:10.760 --> 01:09:13.640
be a birthday thing. We're gonna have a good time.

1137
01:09:14.439 --> 01:09:18.520
So everybody watching show up, it's gonna be good. We're

1138
01:09:18.520 --> 01:09:20.159
all gonna be here. We're gonna have a good time.

1139
01:09:20.960 --> 01:09:24.880
And I guess I guess Lady G didn't pay her

1140
01:09:24.920 --> 01:09:25.560
WiFi bill.

1141
01:09:26.279 --> 01:09:32.399
Oh no, let me let me you should play games.

1142
01:09:32.920 --> 01:09:35.079
I think we should play a game or something on

1143
01:09:35.199 --> 01:09:39.520
your on here or something. I don't know what. It's

1144
01:09:39.520 --> 01:09:40.720
gotta be something interesting.

1145
01:09:41.399 --> 01:09:43.800
We'll figure something out. So let me hold up real

1146
01:09:43.880 --> 01:09:45.359
quickly me let me.

1147
01:09:47.680 --> 01:09:48.239
There she is.

1148
01:09:48.920 --> 01:09:53.840
Yeah, just like every time I come in somebody's voice,

1149
01:09:53.920 --> 01:09:55.520
I can't hear it, So then I gotta leave and

1150
01:09:55.600 --> 01:09:56.239
come back again.

1151
01:09:57.079 --> 01:09:58.439
Damn it, damn pomcast.

1152
01:10:01.119 --> 01:10:07.159
Alright, so really quick, what the hard rock.

1153
01:10:08.479 --> 01:10:10.479
I'm at a convention at the hard rock Casino in

1154
01:10:10.520 --> 01:10:11.239
Atlantic City.

1155
01:10:11.680 --> 01:10:12.399
Oh gotcha?

1156
01:10:13.960 --> 01:10:14.880
Damn Atlantic City?

1157
01:10:16.479 --> 01:10:21.840
Yeah, all right, so real quick. Sometimes love doesn't die,

1158
01:10:22.319 --> 01:10:25.359
It just gets drowned by ego, pride, or poor listening.

1159
01:10:26.399 --> 01:10:29.760
You can hold somebody and still not understand.

1160
01:10:31.199 --> 01:10:34.920
What I said her, some child's godmother.

1161
01:10:35.840 --> 01:10:41.000
Oh you can. You can say I love you and

1162
01:10:41.119 --> 01:10:45.720
still never make them feel heard. If you're constantly defending

1163
01:10:46.000 --> 01:10:53.159
instead of listening, reacting instead of reflecting, proving instead of understanding,

1164
01:10:53.720 --> 01:10:56.479
you're not fighting for the relationship. You're fighting to win

1165
01:10:57.960 --> 01:11:02.920
and in love when when becomes the goal, connection becomes

1166
01:11:03.000 --> 01:11:08.399
the casualty fix, the translation before silence becomes the only

1167
01:11:08.520 --> 01:11:11.880
thing you both speak. M hm mm hmm.

1168
01:11:13.479 --> 01:11:17.279
Okay, Jerry Springer, be.

1169
01:11:17.359 --> 01:11:26.199
Good to yourself and each other. All right, but anyway,

1170
01:11:27.119 --> 01:11:31.359
all right? Next next episode will be marsh eleventh. Thanks

1171
01:11:31.439 --> 01:11:34.000
everybody for coming out, Thanks for everybody for being here,

1172
01:11:35.319 --> 01:11:38.079
and thank you for being fans of the show, we

1173
01:11:38.159 --> 01:11:43.520
appreciate you, the Purage Squad and an effect, and always remember, always,

1174
01:11:43.560 --> 01:11:47.960
you gotta always remember that even though we are who

1175
01:11:48.000 --> 01:12:01.560
we are, at some point, good night, every good night, everybody, goodnight.

1176
01:12:01.560 --> 01:12:05.039
Imagine you, guys, me saying good night, good night, good night,